Bonded for Life
by ICURAQT2
Summary: Ch 15 new! Advancing the plot - unsired! I love reviews! Original premise: Here's what might be happening in Mystic Falls post 409. Inspired by Stefan finding out about certain DE shenanigans and a vision of what it might be like when the sire bond can truly be broken...because I don't think what Damon told Elena to do at the end of 409 truly did enough to break it
1. Chapter 1

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 1**_

_A/N - Sometime in the future, hopefully sooner than later…perhaps shortly after #409. As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others…darn… ;-) _

_**Stefan's POV**_

Ink was flying across page after page. Randomness, emotions, red herrings, and on and on…

The sire bond…the effin' sire bond…it crept into every nuance and fiber of her being. It was different from the hybrids. Maybe it was different because of being a different species. Maybe it was different due to the feelings Elena had before turning. _Who knows? Who cares? It's just different._ He can see it in her. The extra thought she puts into every decision. It's not her opinions she's weighing. It's wondering "What will Damon think?" "What would Damon want?" "What would make Damon happy?" "I'm happy making Damon happy…"

It was disgusting. Sickening. No better than the Tri Delts or Andy, _poor Andy_. Maybe worse since Andy still seemed to have some of her mind intact despite the compulsion. She at least disagreed with Damon at times, didn't she? But Elena, his beautiful and brilliant Elena…Aw hell, who was he to mourn her loss..a killer, he killed Andy and so many more…But come on…Damon? Kowtowing to his every whim…

Of course Damon didn't do it on purpose. He hadn't even known that his blood had been given to Elena to heal her until after she'd drowned. Why hadn't Elena been told? Damn Meredith. Thank God for Meredith. Which was it? Better to be alive-ish but sired instead of really truly, permanently dead, right?

It's too bad they never anticipated something like this. They could have put some of Stefan's blood on ice with the doc just in case something ever happened to Elena…It would have seemed "normal" that Elena would want to be cured by her boyfriend's blood more than anyone else's, no slight to Damon or any other vamp intended. But whatever, it's too late now. It's too depressing to ponder the "what if's", the "what could have been's"…_Argghh, stop it, stop brooding_, he chided internally, _think of how to fix this, not about what would have happened if it had be your blood…_

He didn't want Elena sired to him anyway. It probably wouldn't have happened since it's so rare. Either way, it was so much more powerful knowing Elena gave herself freely to him and loved him so powerfully in return. There had been nothing supernatural about their love, but it had been, it _is_, _was_ extraordinary. Their connection was so complete, even though they'd needed to recover from ripper days and more, it didn't seem that their love would ever fail to get them through any tragedy that would befall them.

That should have meant something when Elena's feelings were amplified with the transition. Her feelings about everything, everyone, should have been amplified, including her feelings, her strongest and deepest feelings presumably, for Stefan should have carried more weight. You'd think… But that must be an indication of how significant the sire bond is or…that she had deeper feelings for Damon than he'd thought. Fuck. That stopped him mid-sentence.

Round and round the thoughts raced, never allowing him to arrive at a better place, a place of hope. It was getting harder and harder to hang on to hope that somehow, some way, they'd find the cure. Maybe it wouldn't be the complete cure that allowed Elena to become human again. But maybe something could cure or remove the sire bond. It's not like a vampire could turn a hundred times to experience the pain of it and stop feeling unnaturally indebted to Damon for having stopped the pain. There wasn't any pain, not like that. He hadn't saved her from a life of changing at each full moon. So…did he save her from something else? From dying? Sort of… But she didn't want this anyway. She said she was prepared to die. She wouldn't have felt grateful for living this way… So what then caused the sire bond?

Maybe Tyler was wrong. Maybe he found a way to break the bond but maybe it worked for completely different reasons than Bill Forbes had said, not out of some false sense of gratitude. Maybe it was one of a number of possible cures but not the cause.

When the hybrids were transitioning all those times, they felt immense pain. They screamed and cried out in agony. Every bone in their bodies was broken, over and over. It had to be horrifyingly awful, especially since it was all self-inflicted.

Stefan pondered on this a while. Was he missing anything else? If he was, it wasn't coming to him tonight. With sarcasm, he determined the net of all this so far was that he needed to get Elena to torture herself into breaking the sire bond even though it probably wouldn't work. He rolled his eyes and scoffed at the ridiculousness it. He could no more torture her, allow her to be tortured by anyone, let alone make her self-inflict it, than he could stop loving her. He just couldn't.

_I love her still. _

Savoring the pain that loitered with his last thought, Stefan dropped his pen into the crevice created by the binding of his open journal. He rubbed his face with both hands as if to erase the frustration, fatigue, and fear weighing on him. He pressed his palms to his eyes that seemed so dry. It seemed he hadn't blinked once as he poured out his soul. He'd been on a rant, frantically writing as if somehow the answer would appear in his journal. Releasing a heavy sigh and keeping his eyes closed for a longer rest, his hands ran through his hair and flopped down to the arms of his chair as he slouched further into the rich brown leather. He was exhausted. Not just from tonight. Not just from all the painful emotions clawing at his insides, although they were to blame.

He couldn't sleep, not well any way. He needed her beside him. He needed to feel her pressed to his chest, his arm around her, spooning the hours away as they'd sleep. Another sigh softly left his lips as he imagined her next to him in bed. The soft aroma of her shampoo, nuzzling her hair, hitching a leg between hers, the warm wet heat…His head bobbed waking him. He'd drifted off sitting up in the chair and he'd woken just as his fingers were exploring her warm skin.

It was easier to fall asleep outside of his bed…their bed…any bed. As soon as he'd make his way to a bed, it was like a second wind would hit him. His mind would race and torture him with loneliness and longing. He would lie in bed, fantasizing about how it would be when Elena came back to him. Even sleeping at Caroline's didn't help. Caroline even offered to stay by his side, platonically of course, until he fell asleep. She'd have stayed the whole night if it would help. He declined saying he'd only keep her awake.

Now in his room, alone in the boarding house, Stefan looked over at his empty bed. He very much thought of just staying in the club chair for the night but he wanted to turn off the lights so he might as well get up. He did just that, slowly turning off each lamp he'd lit to somehow make the room seem less empty, less lonely. The last lamp clicked off and he stood in the near dark between chair and bed, again hesitating. He slowly peeled off his shirt, his jeans, what the heck, everything came off in a near act of defiance. He didn't have to worry about modesty. It wasn't like her body would be pressing against him, skin to skin, and triggering his passion during the night. It was his bed. He could do what he liked. _Lord knows, they did_…he thought.

He made his way to the side of the bed taking a mental note that he still went to "his" side of the bed. He crawled into bed and made his way to the center of the mattress and propped up both pillows just for him. Under the covers, spread eagle on his back, he made himself as comfortable as he could. It would have been laughable to anyone else watching him try to relax. He was stiff and uncomfortable in his own bed as he tried to take up as much space as he could. His muscles cried out to either get up and hurt something or get over it already and relax. They needed sleep too.

Shifting and repositioning multiple times, it took a solid 45 to 50 minutes for Stefan to finally relax enough to fall asleep. His mind wandered each time he started to drift off, usually startling him awake. Always, he would see her face, smiling up at him, over and over, that smile… And finally he was asleep.

The next morning, Stefan recalled he'd had some nice dreams and some crazy dreams in the five or six hours of sleep he'd been able to get. It was more sleep than he'd had straight through the night in a while. First and foremost in his dreams, he was with Elena in happier times. Maybe it was the past or maybe it was the future and they were happy. It was mostly a montage of various visions with her being happy, smiling, with him, maybe some hand-holding, maybe some kissing. He might have made her laugh a few times…

Then there was this really weird scene he couldn't get out of his mind where Bill Forbes had transitioned, was sired to Damon, and Damon was being a complete jack-ass homophobe. Maybe it was Stefan's subconscious wishing Damon had been gay and thus not always making the moves on Elena. Regardless, he remembered it was funny to him while he was dreaming but he couldn't remember why exactly when he was awake. Thinking of others Damon had turned, he wondered if Vicki or Isobel would have ever exhibited any symptoms of a sire bond had they had the chance to test it out. But none of the others Damon turned had had romantic feelings for Damon before turning, certainly none that anyone knew about and certainly not Bill Forbes. _LOL_, he thought. Caroline Forbes certainly didn't. She hated Damon back then, especially when she remembered all he'd compelled her to forget. So, it was just lucky Stefan, once again the fool, and life ripping out his heart, again… Just Elena and one crazy, sad brick counting vamp in New Orleans, who'd loved Damon before turning; they were the few who were blessed with a sire bond.

Damon had tried to get rid of the sire bond back then but now they knew the bayou witch had failed. Her daughter claimed there wasn't a spell that could break it. It had all been a lie so the witch could increase her power and twelve more innocent people had died in the effort.

Stefan got up, oblivious to, but splendid in his nakedness. He stretched and yawned, crossed to his journal and brought it back to bed with him. Under the covers again, he began to pour out more of his ramblings and wild hairs in the hopes that some new breakthrough would come of the effort. He made a note to ask Bonnie about researching possible spells since maybe the other witch had lied or just didn't know of any.

As he wrote, he remembered another part of his dream. Bill Forbes had kissed then bitten Damon on the neck as he tried to express his admiration for Damon. Bill had even drunk from Damon, trying to take as much of Damon into himself as possible. Damon had then poked Bill in his eyes, kind of _Three Stooges-esque_, then punched Bill and broke his neck. Bill Forbes spun around with a big smile on his face and fell down dead doing a prat fall just like in the old comedy films. OK, so the dream wasn't a breakthrough on the sire bond problem, and he certainly didn't want Damon to hurt Elena, but at least now Stefan remembered why it was sort of funny watching it in his dreams (or at least why his subconscious thought it funny).

Making no further progress writing, Stefan made his way reluctantly to the shower. It wasn't that he didn't want to take a shower. He just knew that the sooner he was ready to go about his day, the sooner he'd be face to face with some new painful reality of losing Elena. He simply didn't want to experience any further reinforcement of the loss. He was avoiding. He'd already done a fair amount of damage in the boarding house, which he still needed to revisit and correct.

He bowed his head under the hot spray of the rain shower head. It was hotter than Elena would have been able to take. He leaned his hands up on the wall in front of him. The stronger side jets worked his chest and back. He must have let the water beat down on him standing perfectly still for five or ten minutes. He watched as the water swirled slowly to the drain and left him behind. In his preoccupied morning haze, he wished he could manifest a metaphysical change and join with the water to leave everything else behind. The concept seemed soothing to his soul as the water left with ease, not letting much deter its eventual departure.

It was wasteful, he knew, but he honestly didn't care today about water conservation. He needed an indulgence. The steamy spray built up shadowing him in steam within the enclosed glass shower to the point no one would have been able to see him from the outside through the fog. He thought about relieving some stress right then and there since he was so shielded from the outside world. It couldn't hurt, could it? Nah, forget it…

Grabbing the all-in-one shampoo, he lathered and rinsed. Soaping his hands next, he lathered his face, scrubbed his neck, his arms, underarms, and more slowly, his chest. He snickered at himself, scoffing and laughing at the idea he was seducing himself, in the shower as his hands roamed his chest, slippery fingers skimming his nipples…

His right hand lathered up with more suds and he turned his body so that the spray wouldn't take away all the soapy silkiness too quickly. Slowly, he began to stroke himself. He tried to keep his mind very specifically focused to this time, this place, just a few minutes to ease free of this world's problems. But it led mostly to frustration. Each time he felt himself get closer, to building to the next level, he was only able to think of her and yet thinking of her, missing her, made it more difficult to get lost in the moment.

He nearly stopped but so wanted to feel better, to have a moment where pain wasn't at the forefront. He convinced himself that it would be ok to think about her, physically, to think about her body, her sex, and her mewling cries of pleasure. He rolled toward the wall, leaning his shoulder into it for balance. It was cool to the touch and a contrast to the hot water and friction of his hand. It didn't take much longer for him to reach his peak as he imagined Elena pressed between him and the shower wall and his body driving them home together. As he came, he mouthed her name in a silent cry of want.

He panted as he worked through his last shuddering touch and release. Eyes closed and forehead resting on the wall he slowly regained his composure. As good as it felt, he was still overcome with his longing for her and his guilt for using her image in this way. She was so much more than sex to him. _Ah, get over yourself, Salvatore_, he chided, _don't be such a girl_. Despite the sexist joke meant to distract himself, he knew he had to try to not let his emotions, his built-in guilt-o-meter, run to the extreme. He could easily end up crying on the floor if he let himself wallow.

No, if anything, he needed to use other emotions to propel him forward. Anger was great fuel, like the anger over the betrayal of his loved ones. _How could they_…? But he didn't want to think about his brother or her just now. So he straightened up and finished showering. He hurried through dressing, drying his hair, brushing his teeth, and any other daily rituals. It was time to leave his room and face the day.

Elena was at home having been discharged, dismissed, commanded to leave, by Damon. She didn't like it one bit. Why would he do that?


	2. Chapter 2

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 2**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – as well as the dialogue excerpted from 409… no infringement intended._

_**Elena's POV**_

Elena was at home having been discharged, dismissed, commanded to leave, by Damon. She didn't like it one bit. She wanted to be at the lake house. She wanted to protect and be close to Jeremy, her only real family left. Why wouldn't Damon let her do that? She felt better knowing he was talking care of Jeremy of course, protecting him. She thought back to their last conversation trying to make sense of it. She couldn't separate her actions and reactions to his words, never mind her emotions, and was struggling to figure out what it all meant. Was she her own person anymore?

She parsed through all that they'd said, dissecting it and aligning it with her responses.

E:_ All the drama,…you're missing the actual fun part._ (She remembered entreating him with mistletoe over their heads. She wanted to make him feel good since he obviously didn't.)

D:_ Elena, we can't,…I can't. _(No kissing. Ok, then. She stopped flirting and tried another approach immediately. Logic. Emotions.)

E:_ Damon, you can't keep telling me this isn't real. I know how I feel and that you feel it too, so stop fighting it. _(He ignored her plea.)

D:_ It's good to see you like that, all normal with your brother. I want that again for you. _(Did she want it even more now that he'd said that?)_ Christmas was always mine and Stefan's favorite holiday when we were kids. Not that I've celebrated it since. Kind of miss that…_(Immediately she'd thought of making a list of ways to help him celebrate Christmas. Maybe she could even get Stefan to celebrate with him since Damon missed it so..but Stefan…hmm, maybe not…)

E:_ You're thinking about how upset he'll be when he finds out that you and I are together._

D:_ I've been lying to him all day. _(He feels guilty; no she had to make it better…)

E:_ No, you were helping me with Jeremy._

D:_ The point is not what I was doing. The point is that I'm here with you. I was supposed to invoke the sire bond, Elena, send you away. I was supposed to do the right thing by you and the right thing by my brother, which is what I'm going to do right now._

_You're going to go home._

E:_ What? No! Damon. _(The image of her home had flashed before her. She missed it. Her bedroom, her old life…)

D:_ I'm going to stay here with Jeremy. I'm going to help him complete the mark. I'll teach him how to hunt. I'll protect him. And we'll kill vampires without you._

E:_ Damon, please! _(And even though she pleaded with him, another part of her mind was already mentally taking note of which belongings she needed to remember to pack up and take home…)

D:_ I'm setting you free Elena. This is what I want. This is what will make me happy. _(She had calmed considerably knowing that Damon would protect Jeremy. She wanted to make Damon happy and he wanted her to go home. What did it mean to set her free? Free from what?)

E:_ I was going to fight you on this, but, suddenly, every part of my body is telling me that I need to get in this car and leave you._

D:_ So do it. _(Was that a reference to her words that morning, or was that just another command? Was she set free like he'd just said – free from what? Or was she leaving because he ordered her to – and thus still sired?)

Either way, she still kissed him, she wanted to kiss him goodbye. She was still so conflicted about leaving even though she knew she had to leave. He hadn't told her not to love him or that he didn't love her. He'd only said that she was "set free" and to "go home".

And she'd been home for a while now. This was the second night spent on her own in her home, well Jeremy's home really since technically she was dead, undead. As she wrote about their conversation in her journal, she paused for a moment taking in the quiet. It wasn't often that she or anyone in her world could simply sit back and enjoy the calm. If she'd still been human, she might have been less enthusiastic about being home alone in a house that made interesting noises only noticed when it was super quiet. But as a vampire, she had no such fears. She could protect herself and identify noises ad nauseam.

The phone buzzing pulled Elena from her respite. Caroline called wanting to learn the latest happenings with Jeremy and the lake house. She'd been focused elsewhere and hadn't really talked much to Bonnie or Elena since well before the hybrid slaughter.

"What do you mean you're here? I thought you were at the lake house?"

"No, I came home last night with Bonnie."

"Come down to the grill. I'll call Bonnie too," Caroline chirped encouragingly.

"I don't know. I'm kind of enjoying the quiet…"

"Elena, come on, don't be a killjoy. We need to catch up. The proverbial shit has hit a lot of fans. I'm hanging up and calling Bonnie. I'll see you at the Grill at 8:00," and she was gone. Elena let out a deep sigh, typical Caroline, interrupting her lovely quiet night. Well, she thought, I'd better get an update from the lake house if I'm supposed to update the girls. Elena dialed Jeremy first, not wanting to upset Damon by reaching out to him directly.

"Hey, sis."

"Jeremy, how's it going?"

"Well, good, interesting. It's kind of like _Fight Club, the Return_."

"Hmm, ok, are you sure you are OK?"

"Yes, fine, stop worrying. I can handle myself now, remember. What are you doing?"

"Just hanging out at home. I'm supposed to update the girls on the latest so I thought I'd check in on you and Shane and…"

"And Damon, he's fine, we're all fine. You going to see Bonnie?"

"Yes, probably. Caroline's calling her now. She wants us to meet at the Grill." Elena was wishing she'd told Caroline to come over instead. She really didn't want to go out.

"Tell her hey and thanks again for me would you?"

"Sure, Jer, I'll tell her." Her voice held some gentle teasing about his possible feelings for her friend.

"Have fun. If Matt's working, say hey too. Make him clean up something really gross."

"Yeah sure,…Ok,…well,…" She was stumbling, hesitating.

"Elena, did you want to talk to…" Elena heard a little commotion in the background and it sounded like something was thrown at and hit Jeremy.

"No, no, just you, checking in and whatever…"

"Ok, later Elena…"

"See ya, Jer. Be careful."

Elena just barely heard Damon in the background saying an overly sweet and lilting "Have a nice time…" just under his breath.

And Jer saying, "Dude, what the hell?" before the line finally went dead. Elena giggled knowing it was Damon who'd thrown something at Jeremy to stop him from passing the phone over.

Elena felt better once she started getting ready. It would be good to get out with the girls. The last time they had stayed in, at the boarding house. Things got a little tense with the news of Elena and Damon being together. Hopefully they'd be past that and could have a good time as well as catch up.

Arriving a couple minutes early, Elena was surprised to see Bonnie and Caroline already in a booth. She joined them questioning how they were already halfway through their cokes. "Did I miss anything? Am I late or something?"

"No, no, I was already here. I had dinner with my Mom," Caroline offered.

"I'm just quicker than you," Bonnie teased innocently.

"Ha!" Elena slid in on Bonnie's side when her friend made room leaving Caroline with the space she preferred to gesture broadly and be able to survey her surroundings. Typical Caroline; she had her audience in front of her and, gosh, she was a hand talker when she got going. _LOL_, Elena thought as she listened and watched. As horrible as the content of their discussion was, Elena did so enjoy being with her girls.

Caroline proceeded to share information from her Mom, more details of the hybrid situation, and Tyler's Mom. She couldn't wait to tell them what Hayley had done to screw them over. Eventually she got around to Klaus' involvement and wondering if he'd known all along. Was he Hayley's partner in crime on this? Was it someone else? She remarked about Hayley having been seen with that Professor at the Miss Mystic Falls event. At the time, Caroline remembered thinking that was just a little odd but hadn't really focused on it as she was more perturbed with Tyler and Hayley play-acting at dating all for her and Klaus' benefit that day. She'd really only catalogued Hayley and the Professor as odd because of the conversation that day with Elena about Shane showing up so much and him being creepy until proven otherwise.

Finally, Caroline wound down and wanted to know more from the girls. "So, Jeremy, emo bro, the hunter…not so little anymore…" They all shared their respective looks of appreciation, half disbelief and half amazement, at the newly muscular little brother.

Bonnie didn't catch herself soon enough and spurted hers out loud, "I know, right?" Her face, her eyes gave away more than a hint of her lustful appreciation for Jeremy's more robust physique. The girls just gave her a knowing smirk and she blushed quiet.

"So what happened?" continued Caroline.

Elena took pity on Bonnie and answered for her. "Bonnie worked her magic and somehow anchored him by his positive feelings for _her…" _ (Elena gave an overt wink wink and Caroline giggled. "…And associated those trusting feelings back to me. It somehow undermined his subconscious hunter urges and made him remember I was his sister and someone he didn't want to hurt. Right?" She looked at Bonnie to see if she'd summarized it correctly even though she'd teased her along the way.

"Yeah, it took a lot of effort on Jeremy's part but he worked it out," Bonnie answered, proud of Jeremy.

"Don't be modest, you did a lot too," Elena added. "He says _hey_ and _thanks again_ by the way." Elena gave her a knowing smile.

Bonnie tried to continue to direct the conversation away from her and Jeremy. "Yes, well, Shane was a big help and..."

"So, the professor was at the lake too…" Caroline interjected abruptly. Elena shared a look with Bonnie trying to piece together the reason for the interruption. "Seriously? And you two don't see anything odd about that?"

"Care, it's ok, I know we were, we are concerned about him, but I talked to him. He seemed to genuinely want to help."

Bonnie looked grateful at Elena's words, glad she wasn't going to have to defend Shane alone. But then Elena continued.

"He does have some very strong motives though. He told me about losing his family. He might be hiding something about Silas and that whole story, but he's definitely helping when it comes to Jeremy and me. I do still have some suspicions though and so does Damon."

Elena tried to ignore the scoffing roll of eyes from Caroline and continued. "Damon thinks Shane might have been involved with blowing up the council." Both Bonnie and Caroline seemed shocked by this, their mouths dropping open.

"Why? Why would he think that?" Bonnie asked stunned.

"Because Shane knew the Pastor. They were in communication, lots of phone calls and such, right before the explosion. April recognized him too. No one else knew him. And now Shane is, well, in the mix, a lot." The girls sat quietly for a moment, letting this all sink in.

"If it's true and if Shane was involved in both the murders of the council and the murders of the hybrids, and the hunter's activities…" Caroline let that thought hang in the air. None of them knew what to say next. If it was true, Shane was more dangerous than maybe even Klaus. Shane was the unknown. Even humans had been targeted…And the Mayor was more collateral damage…

"Any way…we'll have to figure that out sooner than later…" Caroline tried to lighten the mood just subtly by changing the subject. She wanted to get a last update on Elena and all things sire bond related, no doubt for Stefan. "But you think he's really helping with Jeremy…Does Shane know about the sire bond? Could he help with that too?"

Elena wasn't sure what to say next. Should she tell them how things were left between her and Damon? "I don't think we need him to help," Elena offered quietly.

"Elena…," Caroline whined softly wanting so to get through to Elena.

"Caroline," Bonnie chimed in help reign her in. She knew a little about what had happened at the lake.

"It's OK Bonnie." Elena was a bit peeved. She turned full on facing Caroline, shoulders straight and said strongly, confidently, "There is no more sire bond."

"What?" The girls were confusion in stereo.

Elena didn't take her eyes off Caroline's. "My last night at the lake, Damon invoked the sire bond. He told me to go home and that he set me free."

"Wait, what? He can just do that and it's gone?" Caroline probed.

"I guess so…"

"And how do you feel?"

Elena thought for a minute then answered. "I miss him. I want him to come home but he's protecting Jeremy, so, so I can wait." Bonnie and Caroline sat looking at her quizzically. Elena looked between them not sure why they seemed not to believe her. With more than a little frustration, she snapped at them both. "What?"

"He told you to go home and that he set you free…What does that mean?" Caroline clarified.

"I,..I,.. I came home. I left him there…" Elena tried strongly to reinforce the truth of her words.

"Ok, so wait, you came home. What did you do then?"

"Nothing much, laundry, wrote in my journal, cleaned the bathroom…" Turning to Bonnie she added, tongue in cheek, "Jeremy's a slob by the way." She gave a small smile at her effort to change this to having a nice evening with her girls.

Caroline didn't let up. "Did you leave the house?"

"I came here didn't I?"

"Before that?"

"No, I didn't need to…I didn't want to…it was nice and quiet…"

Caroline's gears were spinning. She gnawed on her lip. "You, Elena Gilbert, stayed in your house from the moment you got back from the lake until coming here." It wasn't a question. It was an observation. They all knew how active Elena was. It was even more pronounced now that she was a vampire. She'd be too jittery sitting at home for days that she would have made plans to do something, anything, an errand. "You said earlier that Jeremy says hello to Bonnie." This was a question.

"Yes."

"When did you talk to him?"

"After you called about coming here. I called there for an update so I could, you know, update you both."

"Who did you talk to?"

"Caroline…"

"Who did you talk to, Elena?" Caroline asked more forcefully.

"Jeremy. And only Jeremy." And suddenly she remembered that she'd heard something, something so minor and soft. It was Damon in a sing-song voice from a distance, like someone would chime into another's phone call from afar…She hadn't talked to Damon, but he'd talked to her. Damon was in the background. He'd said to _have a nice time…_

Her face changed. She was somewhere else. Her friends saw her thinking, leaving them, deep in thought and maybe even seeing a little fear on her face.

She had to go. They begged her to stay, to talk it out. She left them abruptly, a little faster than she should have if she didn't want anyone to suspect she was simply a human girl. Bonnie and Caroline shared concerned looks both wondering how in the world they were going to fix this. They could not allow their friend to not have free will for the rest of her days.

So, is she still sired? Had he given her permission to leave her home…?


	3. Chapter 3

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 3**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410 since they've really given us no indication of what the status is of Elena's feelings and the confrontation with Stefan at the school. I can't wait for him to let her have it though, so…I must write…_

So, is she still sired? Had he given her permission to leave her home…?

Elena sped home. Her mind raced. Was she finally seeing that even when they weren't together, she was still doing what he'd told her to do and was she no longer herself? _No, no, I am me! _she raged internally.

Earlier that day, Stefan had left the boarding house telling Caroline he needed to hunt. He did, but it was really an excuse to ditch her and his surroundings. He ran for miles without thinking, just wanting to distance himself long enough so that she'd leave and he could be on his own. He loved his friend. She was so great letting him explode the other night and quietly being there for him, not stopping his rage. But Stefan didn't want her now hovering, prodding him back to sublimating his anger. He needed his anger now more than ever. Without it, he could easily become a basket case, lost in his anguish.

After finally focusing on and finding some sustenance, Stefan ran back to the boarding house, internally mocking how he used moderate stealth (Caroline's comment coming back to him) to approach the house undetected. Good, her car was gone.

He changed his shirt and jeans, dirtied more by mud than blood, rinsed his mouth, and set out to his car. Consciously, he didn't know where he was going. He just wanted to be gone. The stereo was blaringly loud, screaming almost, with the worst head-banging radio station he knew. Crossing county lines, Stefan had to compel his way out of a ticket. He finally slowed after that, knowing exactly where he wanted to go but was afraid to admit it to himself. He stopped for coffee. An excuse really, to rethink where he should go and what would he do when he got there…

Finally, fooling himself no longer, he headed to the lake house. Once near, he parked the car about a mile away and made his way to the Gilbert lake house. Approaching like a navy seal, keeping hidden and only as close as he needed to be able to see them, her, he watched the house and the surrounding area for the better part of an hour.

At one point, Jeremy walked out to the woodpile. He chopped more wood for a fire. Dang, he's getting big, Stefan thought. It's going to get harder to stop him from hurting people without actually hurting Jeremy in the process. At one point it almost seemed that Jeremy stopped to listen, that he'd sensed something. Did he feel someone watching him? Stefan wasn't even that close. He could barely hear anything going on this far away and thus hadn't figured out what anyone else in the house was doing.

Eventually, Jeremy simply left the axe in the stump and headed into the house weighted down by a load of well-seasoned firewood. Stefan was left to watch and wait. Another hour and nothing, there was no sign of anyone. Stefan reasoned he needed to move closer. He came within 100 feet of the house, approaching from the right hoping it would be less likely for anyone to spot him. Finally he could hear talking and dishes rattling as they ate. But who? He could hear Jeremy, the professor, then finally Damon harassing Jeremy about what little he knew about killing. Where was Bonnie? Where was Elena? Bonnie was a relatively quiet girl so maybe she was off practicing her magic in another part of the house. He listened for her, trying to hear a soft chant or candles blazing lit or being snuffed out…

He tried to place the heartbeats. Jeremy's was thunderous compared to pre-hunter days so it was hard to make out others. He thought he heard one that might have been the professor's but he couldn't be sure. Damned animal diet limited his hearing skills.

Finally, he heard Damon harassing them to finish eating lunch so they could get started on the real lessons for the day. He told them to meet him outside, in the back which meant the lake side of the house. Stefan moved to ensure he wouldn't be seen when they all came out. He could see Damon emerge through the sliding glass doors to the deck. Stefan stiffened, a part of him wanting to rip Damon apart for laying hands on Elena, especially doing it the right after his break up with her. It was cruel and harsh behavior, even for Damon.

His brother stood there watching the lake for a while before ambling down to the yard. Damon made his way to the dock and began skipping stones across the lake. Stefan watched curious. The only times he'd ever seen Damon do something as passive-aggressive as skipping rocks was when he was frustrated about something, usually about a woman, which meant Katherine.

The sliding doors opened again and Jeremy started to exit the house. But Stefan heard the professor calling him back for a minute and back inside Jeremy went, closing the doors behind him. That was curious, a little. What did he want to tell Jeremy without Damon hearing?

Stefan looked back to the dock. Damon wasn't there.

"Hello, brother." The voice came from behind Stefan. He cringed and seethed at the same time, knowing that if he turned around he might just rip Damon's arms right off his body. He didn't want Damon this close yet. He'd wanted to see _them_ from a distance, together, to see the reality in action before he confronted them both.

"Whatcha doing?" Damon asked mocking Stefan's spying on them.

Slowly Stefan rose up from where he'd been hunched down and surveying the lake house. He took a deep breath and slowly turned around to face Damon. Damon was a good ten yards away. Smart, Stefan thought, to keep his distance. Both knew that Damon was stronger, fed better, and was faster than Stefan. But Stefan was angrier and thus less predictable. He also may have had weapons for all Damon knew.

Stefan simply stared at him. Damon wasn't prepared for this. He expected violence. He grew uncomfortable with Stefan not speaking, just simply boring holes into him across the distance between them. Damon knew. He knew that Stefan knew. It was bound to come to this.

Damon actually felt guilt gnawing at him much as he had when he'd been skipping stones across the lake and thinking about his brother and her…He was actually feeling sick about the whole thing. Not about loving Elena; he did love her. But that he'd believed it was all real. And now, now he just didn't know.

"It had already happened, Stefan," Damon started carefully. "It was before, before you told me about the sire bond…"

Stefan's upper lip quivered in disgust. Damon knew what Stefan was thinking. _How could you? _Of course that question, if voiced, would have been laced, no, saturated with animalistic rage. Damon would have felt the same in his brother's shoes.

"I thought it was all real, Stefan, otherwise I would never…"

Stefan took a step closer, his body fighting with itself, barely holding him back from killing something, killing his brother. Stefan took two more very purposeful steps closer, still torn between wanting to kill Damon and not letting the rage take over.

Damon took a step closer too but countered a bit for defensive measures. He almost wanted Stefan to beat the crap out of him if it would help him stop feeling so guilty. Guilt was for Stefan. Guilt was a waste of energy. Damon's hands were up trying to slow Stefan down and approach him non-aggressively as he professed his relative innocence.

"It didn't happen again. I sent her away."

"Liar," Stefan growled at him.

"It's true. I admit, it took me a while to do it but I did it. She's home."

"I don't believe you."

"Call her."

It was quiet as they eyed each other for a bit.

"I'm not going to call her, Damon."

"I'll do it."

Stefan sneered again. Damon slipped out his phone and dialed. He held the phone out so they could both easily hear but neither spoke. _Hello?_ Her voice was clear. There was music and a washing machine in the background. _Damon? Damon? I think you butt dialed me…Damon? Well then, I'm going back to my laundry._ The line dropped as she clicked off.

"That doesn't prove..."

"Can you hear that music coming from this house? Come on, Stefan, you know the sound of the wash going at the Gilbert's house…"

"Fine, she's home," Stefan bit out, gritting his teeth, "But you still lied to me."

"I know. I know. Just imagine though for a sec, you finally think you got the girl, that she wants you…Could _you_ let go that easily? I needed some time."

Stefan's fists clenched so hard, he drew blood. He knew Damon was right at least about that. Stefan being there at all was evidence enough that he couldn't let go easily either. Damon took a few steps closer to his brother. Stefan seemed to be relenting from his initial rage.

Stefan came at him in a blinding fury. First a right hook, then an upper cut, a body blow to the kidneys and then a backhand across Damon's face spinning him to the ground. He fell to his knees, his back to Stefan, then leaned forward on his hands to spit out the blood pooling in his mouth.

"Shit, Stefan, I thought you understood."

"Oh, I understand, _brother_. I understand that you took advantage of Elena, sire bond or no, immediately after your _brother_ and she broke up. That you have wheedled yourself into a relationship with the woman your _brother_ loves which has led us to the point where she developed feelings for you which more than likely are the cause of a sire bond. That's what the beat down is for. I should kill you but I won't. Because I also understand what it's like to love her and be loved by her. I completely understand what it would be like to try to let her go. _I've_ had to do it more than once. I won't kill you, for her."

Damon knew Stefan wouldn't, at least didn't believe Stefan would ever really try to kill him. Regardless, he didn't fight back. He deserved this. He wanted this. It would help him, distract him.

Shane and Jeremy had come outside and gotten wind of the Salvatore brothers fighting off to the side of the house. They didn't come any closer than just off the deck and into the yard. This fight was not Jeremy's fight. Before they knew it, Stefan was gone and Damon was flat on the ground. Stefan had shoved a tree branch into Damon's side to slow him down in case Damon tried to follow him.

Caroline called checking in on Stefan. He didn't say much about his day just that he'd hunted and found all the chess pieces, and was staying in for the night. She didn't think anything of it other than he was working through the breakup which she hoped was temporary. It was dark when Stefan rolled back into Mystic Falls. He was headed home but found himself taking a turn back to the Gilbert home. He knew he shouldn't. He tried to convince himself that it was just to see her, to know that she was alright. When he pulled up to the house, he stayed to the far side. There were some lights on but he couldn't hear anything. He slowly pulled around the corner and saw her car backing out of the driveway. She was headed toward town.

He followed keeping his distance and saw her head into the Grill. He waited for a parking spot that allowed him some privacy on the darker side of the Grill. He quietly debated if he should simply stroll into the Grill. He could just happen to run into her. What harm would there be in that. He stopped cold when he heard a laugh that sounded a lot like Caroline.

Getting out of the car, he walked around the building listening for any sign of Elena or Caroline. He continued to debate simply walking in. How would she react to seeing him? But then he remembered the back door and decided, if she did see him, she might be less suspicious that his presence had been pre-arranged if she thought he was there first. He snuck in the back and slid into a booth that hid him from view. _Ok, now what Salvatore?_ he mocked laughing at his childish attempt spy on his ex-girlfriend.

Matt strolled over. This must be his station, Stefan thought. "What's up, man?" Matt asked taking out his order pad and pen. "You know the girls are here, right?" Matt gave a little nod in their direction.

"Yes, you know, I'd rather just be on my own tonight, Matt. Better they don't know…" Stefan was speaking rather quietly. Matt picked up on it and the fact that Caroline, if she focused on them, would be able to hear them.

"You are going to tip me, right? I can rent you the table…" Stefan threw some money on the table smirking. "Something to drink then?" Matt asked all waiter-like. Stefan nodded. Matt knew what to get and left to do so.

Stefan shifted his focus to the girls' conversation. He was pretty interested in the parts where Shane was highly suspect and the whole hybrid situation as well as Klaus' involvement. At one point, someone from school said hello to Stefan but then left him alone rather quickly. If anyone had noticed it would not have been obvious that Stefan compelled them to move along.

Then, finally, things got around to the sire bond. Stefan already knew what Damon had told him. He'd told him that he'd invoked the sire bond. Well he'd actually said that he'd set her free which Stefan assumed meant that he'd broken the sire bond. But was it true?

Listening to the conversation, it seemed obvious that Caroline didn't believe it was broken, but Stefan wasn't sure. Elena had left Damon…Well, she'd left the lake house… Caroline's probing was impressive. She could have been a Fed, an interrogator, or a lawyer. Stefan had a soft smile on his face listening to his friend work, more than likely, on his behalf.

The smile fell away when Elena said that she missed Damon. He heard Caroline trying again…She was asking the very question Stefan now thought of what Damon had said. _He set you free…What does that mean?_

Caroline's questions escalated to the point where Elena suddenly gave no more answers. They were quiet. What happened, he wondered. Then suddenly she was leaving saying she had to go. There was something in Elena's voice, something he couldn't quite pin down. He got up to leave, to follow her and in doing so snuck a glance to where they'd been sitting. Caroline gave him a sad but encouraging smile then focused back on Bonnie as if she hadn't seen Stefan there at all. He left the way he came, leaving a sizable tip for Matt before making his escape.

By the time he was outside, Elena had already pulled out of her spot and was heading the opposite way from home. More than likely she was going around the block and then would turn toward home. That meant she'd likely be coming back around the block towards him. He quickly pulled out and headed around the block, just like she did, to ensure she didn't know he'd been there, listening, spying. He didn't want to give her any reason to be angry with him especially if she were having some kind of realization about the sire bond.

He followed her home, keeping his distance. He parked a block over and watched her hurry into her home. She seemed very agitated. He waited a respectable amount of time so that it didn't seem like he'd been waiting for her. He pulled up in front of the house. Slowly he got out of the car. He adjusted his leather jacket, took a breath and steadied himself before heading to her door. He heard glass breaking and his plan to casually drop by fled his thoughts. He ran to the door. He wanted to run in, to protect her from whatever was happening. But that wasn't his place any more. He knocked urgently instead, calling her name. "Elena! Elena, are you alright?"

He heard her coming to the door which meant she was probably ok. She slowly opened the door.

"Hello, Stefan. What are you doing here?"

"I was, I wanted, I just wanted to see you but then I heard something break..."

"Come on in," she said resigned to his visit. She walked back to the kitchen leaving him to close the door behind them. There was a dish shattered on the floor. She stood looking emotionless at the damage.

"'Lena, Are you OK?"

She took a while to answer. "I wanted to see if I could do it."

"Do what?" He was watching her warily.

"Break this dish." She continued to stare, somewhat entranced by the damage she'd done.

"What?"

"No one told me to do it. I know I shouldn't do it. It was my mother's. I just wanted to know I could decide to do it and then do it."

They were quiet for a few moments. Stefan then went to get the broom and dustpan. He started sweeping up while Elena continued to stare off. She finally noticed a larger piece of glass between her feet and bent to retrieve it. She held it in her hands, feeling the smooth and the jagged edges. She let it cut the tip of her finger and watched it close almost immediately.

Stefan finished cleaning up, pitching the broken remnants into the trash and stowing away the broom and dustpan. By the time he turned back to her, Elena had sliced through her hand with the broken shard. "Elena!"

Stefan flashed to her and grabbed the glass from her. He pulled her to the sink before any blood would spill from her palm. They both watched as she healed quickly. He began rinsing her now healed hand under the warm water.

"What do you think you are doing, Elena?"

She slowly moved her eyes from her hand to Stefan's face. "I told you. I want to know if I can decide for myself."

"So you cut yourself? What kind of a decision is that?"

She pulled her hand away from his grip. "I knew it would heal, Stefan. I wasn't trying to kill myself." She walked away. Stefan turned off the water, dried his hands and followed her to the family room. She was on the couch. He sat down leaving space between them.

He took a new tack. "So, where's Damon?" She looked at him. Could she still read him like she used to, he wondered.

"You know he's at the lake house or you wouldn't be asking."

"You both were. I just assumed since you were back…" he said trying to cover.

She bought it and answered. "No, he stayed to work with Jeremy and Shane."

"Why didn't you? I would think you'd want to be with Jeremy now."

"I do."

"So go. Do you need me to drive you?"

"No."

"No, what? You don't need a ride or no you can't go?"

She hesitated, not sure how to answer. She got up and paced. Stopping suddenly she looked at him.

"Did Caroline call you tonight? Did she send you here?"

"No!" he said defensively but still feeling a bit sheepish since Caroline had obviously known he'd been listening while she'd questioned Elena.

She paced some more.

"Come on, Elena, why don't you go back to be with Jeremy?"

"Because I can't, Stefan! I can't! He sent me away!"

"Who sent you away, Elena?"

"You know damn well who, Stefan. Damon! Damon sent me away. _You _made him. He said he had to do the right thing by you and me. But it was for _you_!"

Stefan sat in stunned silence, disappointed at the probable meaning behind her words and her anger. He could barely ask the question but knew he had to just ask one more. Ever so quietly, he said, "So,…he sent you away,…but you still love him…?" Stefan looked broken, anticipating her answer.

She didn't answer immediately. She sighed heavily and flopped down on the couch. Her arms were crossed over her chest as she slouched into the soft cushions. She looked on the verge of tears. "I don't know. I think so. He wanted me to go away. He said he set me free. Do you think that means he doesn't want me to love him anymore?" She wasn't looking at him. It was almost like she forgot who she was asking the question, that she'd only recently broken up with the man sitting next to her that obviously still loved her…

Stefan knew what he'd like to say in answer. But he didn't. He didn't want to cause her anymore pain than she was already in.

He got up to leave. "I think you should ask him that." And he was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 4**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410 since they've really given us no indication of what the status is of Elena's feelings and the confrontation with Stefan at the school. I can't wait for him to let her have it though, so…I must write…_

Klaus showed up at the lake house the next morning, early. It was odd to see him there. Damon sensed his presence first, while he was outside with Jeremy teaching him some fight moves. Both were covered in grass stains and dust from the patches of dirt they'd created in the lawn from all the rough and tumble activity.

Damon stopped engaging Jeremy and turned to face their audience of one.

"Don't stop on my account."

"Klaus, what are you doing here?"

"I've come to see the progress being made with our hunter."

"I'm not _your_ hunter," Jeremy sneered.

"Why, yes, you are, young Jeremy. If you weren't needed, you'd be dead, so I advise you to once and for all learn some manners."

"Take a break, Jeremy," Damon encouraged over his shoulder, almost gently, not taking his eyes off Klaus. When he saw Klaus glaring back at Jeremy, he turned to face Jeremy and motioned him with his eyes to go in the house. Jeremy looked back at Klaus clearly hating him but managing to control his desire to attack. He headed into the house grabbing his bottle of water on the way in. He was moderately comforted knowing full well that Klaus hadn't been and would not be invited in.

"What do you want, Klaus?"

"I told you. I'm here to monitor the progress being made. I have to say I'm a bit disheartened that I don't see any vampires being murdered by our young hunter."

"We're getting him ready, Klaus."

"I see that, but ready for what? We don't need to make him any better at killing. We just need to help him kill a few vampires. It will be better for him in the long run. Certainly, it will be better for any vampire that doesn't want to be killed by a hunter, perhaps, oh, I don't know, maybe someone like his sister, Elena."

"We already have him trained to not hurt her."

Klaus took that in with a nod, almost looking pleased.

"Well, then perhaps you or your brother would prefer he was less capable of killing you two. Or are you telling me that you've trained him from wanting to kill the likes of you two as well?"

Damon snarled a bit at Klaus. "Feel free to leave, Klaus. You've seen our progress. I'll consider your feedback and continue from here."

Klaus didn't make any indication that he would be leaving.

"Why isn't Stefan here? He was supposed to be in charge of the hunter's mark?"

"He delegated," Damon sneered.

"And where did he think his talents would be of better use than right here?" Damon didn't answer. "He can't be with Elena. She's yours now, isn't that right? Where is the lovely Elena?"

"She's at home."

"Really, that's interesting. I would have thought she'd want to be here with Jeremy, you know, family and all. Not to mention her overwhelming desire to always please a Salvatore…"

Damon tried to control himself but his face contorted and twitched, unsuccessfully masking his anger.

"She is no longer sired to me, if that's what you are insinuating."

"Really? How interesting," Klaus said disdainfully. "And just how did that happen?"

Damon didn't answer. He had noticed Klaus pulling out his phone a few moments before. Klaus now dialed.

"Good morning, Stefan, I hope it's not too early for you, dear boy. I certainly wouldn't want to interrupt whatever important matters are keeping you from your part of our arrangement…"

Damon could hear that Klaus had awoken Stefan, which was surprising even though it was still morning. Maybe he'd gotten drunk last night after their fight. His voice had the same quality he was used to hearing after a night of heavy scotch or bourbon.

"Klaus, what are you talking about?"

"Well here I am, come to visit you and your tribe hoping to see progress on the hunter's mark and I find that you have…" Klaus leered at Damon as he continued, "…_delegated_…this important task to your brother. As you can imagine, I have less confidence in your brother than perhaps you. But since we've been working _together_ to find the cure, is it safe to assume you are working on this as well, albeit from a distance? Or have you once again left me to wonder about your motives?"

Stefan sighed heavily. "Klaus, I couldn't be there…Elena and Damon…"

"Oh, I know all about them. Isn't it just terrible when family betrays family," he remarked dripping with sarcasm and shaking his head at Damon. "But your back-stabbing brother here tells me Elena is no longer sired to him."

They both heard Stefan scoff through the phone. "Yes, she is."

Damon looked puzzled. Klaus watched him and raised an eyebrow questioning him.

"I broke the sire bond," Damon said defensively in answer.

Stefan now knew Damon would hear. "No you didn't, Damon. She's confused. She doesn't know what you meant by being set free. She went home, sure. She's still waiting for you to come home."

Damon didn't believe this and his defenses were still raised. "Maybe she does love me, Stefan. Did you ever think of that?"

Klaus was growing tired of this. "Well I can see I'm not going to get what I need done here until you two figure this out." Damon just looked at him not understanding what should happen next. Klaus sighed at the tedium. "Go! Be more prescriptive in how you 'set her free' and see who she picks, poor girl. I'm tired of all this _As the Salvatore's Turn_ banality. Perhaps then we can be done with this once and for all and get back to the important matter of growing the hunter's mark."

"I need to stay with Jeremy," Damon interjected.

"I'll stay with them…"

"Oh, no you won't..."

"It's not in my interests to harm our hunter. I also know that neither of us trusts the professor so I'll watch him as well. I won't press for an invitation. I'll simply ensure their safety and security while you are away. I expect a prompt resolution to this personal matter and a quick return to the real work at hand. Am I understood?" He didn't wait for an answer. "Good. Get on with it." Klaus ended the call and made his way to a large Adirondack chair facing the lake. Without turning around but knowing Damon still hadn't moved, he said, "Now, Damon."

Begrudgingly, but knowing he needed to find out if Elena still choose him without the sire bond, he left quickly.

Damon called Stefan first. "Where are you?"

"Where do you think, Damon? I'm still in bed."

"You sound hung over."

"Well, I did tie one on last night after realizing my only family had yet again lied to me."

"I told you, Stef. I broke the sire bond. I still think it's broken. I'm on my way now."

"Fine."

"Call Elena and have her come to the house. I'll meet you both there."

"She won't leave the house unless you tell her to, Damon."

"Yeah, right."

"I'm serious, Damon."

"Fine, I get it. You believe the sire bond isn't broken. I'll get her there. Just be there when I get there. I just hit the highway."

They both clicked off the call.

Damon decided he didn't want to talk to Elena yet. He wasn't ready to talk to her. If he was going to find out she really loved him of her own accord, he wanted to be there in person. He sped along and debated what to say when he called her. Better yet, he thought, why not text her? Problem solved. He didn't bother with pulling over to text. But he did wait until he wasn't surrounded by a few semis. He texted her to meet him at the boarding house and indicated he was on his way. Elena texted back immediately confirming she would meet him. She calculated the time it would take for him to return from the lake house. She didn't realize he'd left sooner than his text.

Arriving home, Damon found Stefan dressed and waiting in the main salon. He looked tense and yet tired. He probably hadn't slept well. Damon knew the feeling. Sauntering into the room, Damon headed straight for the liquor. He poured a drink and motioned to Stefan as if to ask if he wanted one. Stefan simply looked away. Damon drank that first pour and sloshed another into his glass. He made his way to face Stefan from the opposite couch. He let the quiet sit for a while and the clinking of the ice in his glass seemed the loudest noise in the world.

"So, here we are again, brother."

Stefan turned to look at him then looked away in disgust.

They sat waiting her arrival for a couple more minutes.

"I really did think I broke the bond, Stefan. If it's not, I'll try again."

Stefan didn't look at him but gave a nod that he heard him.

"I do worry that you won't survive this if she chooses me, though."

Stefan tried not to but snarled a bit. "You don't worry about me at all, Damon. We wouldn't be in this situation if you did." He'd risen to his feet by the end of his statement and took a few strides away from him. He needed some distance.

"Really, that's what you think?"

"Yes, Damon, that's what I think. I think you would do anything to ensure my life is ruined, to take from me whatever it is you think would hurt me most."

Damon smirked and got up to get another drink. He was going to need it today. If he had to again find the strength to let her go again, he'd better have a few under his belt. Damned vampire tolerance, he thought. This scotch was the expensive scotch too.

Stefan took some meaning behind that smirk. "So you don't think you hurt me at every turn? How about at least recently? What about when you blood-shared with my girlfriend? You do remember she was _my_ girlfriend then?" He'd added the last part with a healthy dose of derision.

"Oh, so we are back to that then…Fine Stefan, do you want me to tell her to drink from you? Would that make you feel better?"

"No, Damon! That's not the point. You knew what it would mean to me. You knew she was starving and that she would do it and not realize what it meant. For all we know, maybe it's why the sire bond kicked in when it did, how it did, maybe it made it stronger. We'll never know if it added to the problem or not!"

"Ok, maybe you're right, but doing it wasn't to hurt you, not directly…It was just a nice benefit."

Stefan stopped dead in his tracks where he'd been pacing back and forth behind a couch. "Why?"

"You know why, Stefan."

"No, Damon, I don't. I don't believe it's about an eternity of misery that you promised me."

"Well then think harder, little brother." The booze was loosening Damon's lips.

Stefan paused watching him. "Seriously? Katherine? Still?"

"Yes, Stefan, Katherine. She was the start of all this, wasn't she…She couldn't choose. No I take that back, she chose you in the end. But not at first. She chose both of us at first. How did you get her to push me out?"

Stefan almost looked hurt while still fuming. "I didn't."

"Oh yes, you did. How did you say it? You and your boyish charm," he mocked trying to remember. Then he continued. "You _wheedled_ your way into her heart until she didn't want me at all anymore, didn't you?"

"No."

"Yes, yes, it was good for a while wasn't it? She took us both to bed. I actually believed we no longer had to fight over her. We were all together. We were all happy. It was good wasn't it Stefan, sharing her. I taught you well, didn't I? I showed you the ropes. You got so good at pleasing her she didn't need me anymore, did she?" Damon was growing rather animated by now. "That's it, I've got it. I can solve all our problems." Damon had a delicious smile on his lips and an evil leer in his eyes as he told Stefan his masterful idea. "I'll tell Elena that she should love both of us!"

Like a perfectly timed piece of music, the brothers realized at that moment that Elena was in the foyer watching and listening to them. They didn't know how much she'd heard. It was quiet as she took in the scene, especially those last words of Damon's. She slowly stepped down the stairs and into the salon. She kept looking from one to the other.

Finally, her gaze settled on Damon. "Is that what you want?"

Stefan couldn't help himself. He should have just let Damon dig his own grave, so to speak. But instead he was up against the back of the couch, nearly lunging over it as he shouted "No!"

Elena didn't react to Stefan. She only reacted to Damon. He sauntered closer to her. The alcohol was really kicking in now; he wished he hadn't drunk so much or had gotten so pissed off at Stefan. It was like he couldn't stop the words coming out of his mouth. "Would you like that, Elena?" He reached out to trace fingers softly down her cheek.

"Damon, knock it off!" Stefan warned, growling at him.

She looked so lost, so confused and yet pleased by his touch. There was a slight tremble of her lips. "Would you?" she asked in return.

"I want you to choose, Elena. I want you to choose to be with me, with Stefan, or with both of us."

Elena's knees nearly buckled. Damon caught her with one arm and spun her around to face Stefan.

"Look at him, Elena, is that who you want. Do you think it would make me happy for you to choose him? Or would I be happier if you chose me?" He spun her back around to facing him, still holding her with just one arm. He finished his drink and set the glass on the table near them. "Maybe I'd be happiest if we both had you, Elena. Choose, Elena."

A tear escaped and trickled down Elena's cheek as she searched his eyes for any indication of what he really wanted. She knew it would not be to choose Stefan. But did he really want what he was suggesting?

"She doesn't understand, Damon. Do you? Do you understand what you are doing to her? She's sired. She can't choose if she doesn't know what will make you happiest."

Another tear escaped despite her best efforts to be happy in Damon's presence. "Fine," he said, "fine." He wiped away her tears and gave her a soft smile. Holding his hands to her cheeks, he said soothingly, "You don't have to choose, Elena. It's ok." He leaned in to kiss her knowing this might be the last time she'd ever allow it, never mind want it. Stefan rounded the couch ready to pull him off her if he did more than that.

"Fine, Stefan, I believe you. She's still sired. Now what?"

Stefan took a breath, happy to be moving past the trauma just inflicted on them all.

"Let's talk about that. Why don't we sit…?" Mostly he'd said it so gently for Elena's sake. He was truly concerned that underneath the sire bond that there might be irreparable damage to Elena's psyche after Damon's little stunt. He motioned them forward to sit down. Elena stayed with Damon wanting to sit near him but not too close so she wouldn't be rubbing Stefan's nose in it.

"Elena," Stefan started the conversation. "Why don't you ask Damon what you were asking last night?"

Elena knew exactly what Stefan meant and turned her full attention back to Damon. "Damon, what did you mean you were setting me free?"

Damon's face fell. He couldn't look at her. He stared down at the cushion, his eyes blurring as he lost focus on the pattern of the fabric. Even though he'd just admitted believing she was still sired, looking at her now, it was like learning on a whole other level that he really had failed completely trying to do the right thing.

He reached for her hand which she gave willingly. When he looked up, he saw the love in her eyes as she patiently awaited his answer.

He spoke so softly. "Elena. I love you. You know that. I would happily be with you forever if you let me." She smiled hopefully at him. Stefan clenched his fists but knew Damon was going to get there eventually. Damon stared deeply into her eyes. "But, Elena, what I meant was, I want you to be free of the sire bond. You should no longer feel it driving you to choose me or do what I say just to please me. If you really do love me, all on your own, I'd be so happy."

Stefan cleared his throat.

"But, I want the sire bond to be no part of that. It has to be stopped. You have to feel what you really feel and make your own decisions. Can you do that, sweetheart? Can you please turn off the sire bond? Stop it? For me?" Damon wasn't quite sure what else to say to make it work.

Elena closed her eyes. Almost instantly, she seemed to shake, subtly, slowly at first until it seemed she might be going into a seizure. Her hand was clenching tighter around Damon's hand, so tight she might end up breaking bones. A gasp and a short moan escaped her mouth. Then just as suddenly her eyes flew open. She was staring at Damon with a mix of anguish and horror. She pulled her hand away to cover her mouth and silence another sound coming from her mouth. It looked like she was holding in a scream.

It was a scream that she felt take birth in the pit of her stomach and didn't know if she could keep inside. She wanted to scream like a mother being ripped away from her child, like a tortured animal escaping to freedom. She wanted to throw her body across the room and slam into a wall just to feel the pain.

She looked over to Stefan with her hand still covering her mouth. Her expression changed. Her hand dropped away from her mouth. She looked longingly at Stefan, almost happy to see him. His name was on her lips. She let it escape like a breath. "Stefan." She'd almost smiled when he gave her a look, his hopeful look that she was back, that she wanted him, was again choosing him. But then, like a flood, she remembered all she'd done, all the hurt, the distrust, the betrayal, sleeping with his brother, and again her hand was coming to her mouth to stop her from screaming.

"Elena, it's ok." Stefan started to move toward her but stopped when she stiffened. She looked back at Damon. The shock of what she'd done making her want to retch was etched back onto her face.

"Oh god, oh god…" she muttered behind her hand, looking from one brother to the other. She looked like she was going to crawl right out of her skin as she squirmed away from Damon. Stefan came closer to soothe her in any way he could think would help. He wished he'd had any clue beforehand what turning off a sire bond like this would do to her emotional state. He almost wished they hadn't done it when he saw all the pain coursing through her body and soul.

Stefan's hand just barely touched her and she was instantly silent. Her face quickly aligned back to his. Ever so gently, he took her hand, the one not covering her mouth and held it as tenderly as he could. She seemed to calm a little. He brought her hand to his chest, placing it over his heart. Both of his hands were gently holding her hand in place while his eyes held hers captive.

Gradually, she removed her other hand from covering her mouth and slowly reached out to trail fingers ever so lightly upon his cheek. Again, like a breath, she whispered, "Stefan."

"I'm here."


	5. Chapter 5

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 5**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! _

Damon watched the scene unraveling before him like he was suddenly on the outside looking in. And he was. He stayed glued to the couch, unable to tear his eyes away. He watched the almost visible connection sparking between Stefan and Elena as she slowly applied the lightest touches with the soft pads of her fingers on his brother's cheek. Stefan remained perfectly still, knees bent, one on the floor to stay perfectly aligned face to face with Elena still seated on the couch. Their eyes remained locked even as tears escaped softly, slowly from both of them.

It almost seemed loud somehow when Elena broke the silence with an even softer whisper than before. It was more like she mouthed the words since she couldn't find her voice. "I'm. So. So. Sorry." And then the tears came harder from her. Her hand started to pull away as if she felt she didn't have the right to touch him. His hand moved her hand back to completely palming his cheek. His other hand moved to cup her cheek in return.

"It's ok. It's ok, 'Lena. It's not your fault…" Stefan murmured low. They continue to stare and cry, like they were taking in the sight of a long lost lover.

"No, it's mine." Stefan and Elena were taken aback hearing Damon's voice. Elena abruptly pulled her hand free from Stefan. At the same time, she turned her face to look at Damon which disengaged Stefan's hand from her cheek. The loss of contact was painful to both of them, especially Elena, even though she was the one who made sure contact was disrupted.

Damon had gotten up from his place on the couch when he'd spoken those three words. He went straight for the bottle from which he'd been pouring drinks, put it directly to his lips and downed four long pulls of the burning brown liquid.

Stefan slowly rose up to standing. Despite the warring sibling rivalry, the sight of his shattered brother pulled at Stefan's heart. He understood the pain of being on the losing end. "It was the sire bond, Damon. None of us understood it at the start."

Damon didn't speak. He didn't look at them again. His back to them as he walked away, he simply raised the bottle as if toasting them in goodbye. He grabbed his leather jacket with his free hand on the way and left through the front door. He left the door ajar, swaying softly in the breeze of his exit.

Stefan watched as Damon left. He knew there was little that could be said or done to help Damon. Time was the only thing that could possibly mend him. A fleeting thought to warn the Tri Delts crossed his mind before he decided sarcasm, even unsaid, was inappropriate at this moment.

Stefan moved to sit at Elena's side. She was sitting so perfectly still. It was a complete contradiction to the emotions and chaos, the complete and utter turmoil in her mind. The only visible indications of the reality inside were her nails dug into the couch and the look in her eyes. It wasn't quite grief, closer to devastation. It was the look some people had after great tragedy, when they finally believed in the reality of it but weren't yet allowing themselves to feel it fully. He recalled the same look on 9/11 when people finally believed they weren't watching a _Die Hard_ movie, that it was really happening, had happened, but still it hadn't quite hit them fully yet.

He sat with her there not quite knowing what to do. His left arm was around her, but on the back of the couch, not touching her. He knew what a trapped animal would do if they felt cornered. Some instinct was telling him this would be similar. He wanted to stroke her arm, to soothe at least some of the anxiety but thought he'd better speak first. It was soft, just a reminder that he was there for her, hoping to pull her back to the present and be in the moment with him.

"Hey."

She blinked but didn't move.

"Elena."

She sniffed, the remnants of tears subsiding.

With a minute shake of her head, "How could I?" was all she said. Just three little words… It didn't mean just one thing. She meant everything.

"It's ok, E-"

She silenced him with a look and the firmness of her statement. "It's _not_ ok." She paused, looking at him, taking him in as if she hadn't seen him in ages. Then as if re-remembering, she said, "How can you even look at me?" She looked away. "I can't stand it. I want to rip my skin off and leave me behind."

"Elena,..."

"No, Stefan, you can't possibly forgive me for what I've done. And Caroline…and Bonnie…and Jeremy…uh…Jeremy." She closed her eyes at the painful thoughts, her tears coming back at the thought of her brother. "I made this happen to him, when I killed the hunter…." She looked back at Stefan. He waited patiently, letting her get it out but dying to hold her in his arms. "I've killed, Stefan. I never wanted that..." Her tears became a full blown crying jag, a meltdown. His arms were quickly around her and she curled into his chest. He slid her onto his lap and smothered her in his arms and body like she was a small child needing protection. Her body was wracked with sobs as she hid her face in his chest and tried to disappear.

Stefan rocked her in his arms for at least an hour. He shushed and soothed, rocked and cooed to her. He whispered over and over that they would get through this, it would be alright, just let it out, she'd see, it would get better, they'd work it out, together…

Elena quieted at times, sniffled into his shirt, cried harder again, then calmed again. Her hair was a mess, damp with tears and hiding her face as she nuzzled into him trying to hide her face. When she seemed to have gotten to the end of her crying, Stefan tried with gentle fingers to brush back her woebegone mess of hair. Instead she turned her face further down into his chest. She didn't want to be seen.

They sat quietly for a few more minutes. Finally Stefan asked if she'd like to lie down. She stiffened straightaway. "I don't mean anything by that, it's just that this…_awakening_ is taking a toll on you and I want you to rest, 'Lena. It's going to take time," he added, assuring her that he understood she wouldn't be over the trauma immediately. He waited for any sign from her.

"Should I take you home, Elena?" It took a minute, but she shook her head no. "Have you fed?" She nodded yes. He waited again, to see if she would voice any of her thoughts. "Do you want to lie down for a while?" Again it took a bit for her to answer but she slowly nodded yes. "I'll take you upstairs…" he said, half a suggestion, half a question. She slid her arms slowly up and around his neck to hold on which usually signaled for him to carry her, but she still wouldn't look at him. Slowly, no vamp speed needed, he walked first to the door to nudge it closed and walked slowly upstairs all the while carrying her like the broken young girl she was.

He gently placed her on his bed and when she wouldn't let go, he lay beside her. Her arms came back down to her sides. Protectively he sheltered her and nuzzled softly into her hair just as she did into his chest. "Ssh, sleep now. We'll talk more again later. Just rest now." He petted her gently, rhythmically, soothingly.

And did she sleep. It was eight hours later when they both woke in the dark. Even Stefan had slept lightly, making up for the restless nights without her but still on guard for her. He had woken a few times and just watched her. He wanted to be sure she was not having nightmares not to mention to be sure that this hadn't all been a dream for him, that she was really here in his arms. He even remembered to check his phone and wondered why Klaus hadn't bothered them. Maybe Damon went back to the lake house…

"Can you ever forgive me?" she half whispered, half croaked, having not spoken for hours.

"I told you. I don't need to forgive you, Elena. You were under a spell. You can't be held responsible for a sire bond."

"Please, Stefan. I need it…if you can,…please."

"Yes, yes, Elena, I forgive you, I forgive you. But you know, you are going to have to find a way to forgive yourself." He nuzzled in her hair and kissed the top of her head while his right hand gently circled her lower back.

"I don't know if I can do that."

"Do you remember that day we hiked above the falls, the day we thought was going to be your last day as a human? Before the sacrifice…?" She nodded. "Do you remember what we talked about, the worst parts of being a vampire?"

She knew exactly what he was talking about. His words had always stuck with her. It explained so much about him. "That sadness turns to despair…That grief and loss could cripple you."

Her words, reciting his words back to him, meant that she'd thought about the next thing he'd said that day. "We have to be able to forgive ourselves and move forward, Elena. If not, you could end up wanting to turn it all off. We wouldn't have us, Elena, our families, the lives I hope we both still want, the love we feel for others."

She didn't answer him but took in his words. She had indeed felt the urge earlier. She'd felt it for the first time, how she was on the precipice of turning it all off as her emotions flooded her, engulfed her. It really did feel like the proverbial light switch both Stefan and Damon had mentioned. She knew in that moment that she could simply flick it off in an instant. But she didn't.

Finally, Elena spoke. "Sorry about your shirt." She'd basically used it as a box of tissues. "I might as well do this to it to." She unbuttoned a button and slid her fingers behind the fabric and used his shirt to dab away her completely smudged eye make-up as best she could. Stefan let out a slight chuckle. It might have lightened the mood, but she was really just buying time, choosing her words. Then, sliding her hand through her hair and brushing it out of her face, she repositioned to be able to look up at Stefan and his beautiful green eyes. The moonlight danced across his face.

"I won't lie to you, Stefan. It crossed my mind. Flipping the switch. I know how to do it now. I could feel it." A small panic pricked at him but he forced himself to remain calm and listened to her. "I don't know if I can do this. Live like this. I never wanted this." _Oh my god_, Stefan thought. _Is she talking about ending her life, her immortal life?_ Trying not to express his internal alarm, he scooted lower to align them face to face.

"It just feels like that right now, Elena. You've been through so much. Too much, I know. But I can help you. And I know you. You are _so_ strong, stronger than you've ever given yourself credit."

"I don't know…" she said, not quite believing, not agreeing with him.

"I do. I know you. This, right now, the real you, working it out." He suddenly kissed her, full on the mouth. He didn't try to turn it into something more, just pressed their lips together like his life depended on it. Then, just as suddenly, he disengaged and sought her eyes. "I'm sorry." He suspected she'd feel conflicted, even if she might want to be with Stefan, she had just slept with, and seemed to be in love with, Damon. Even if that hadn't been real, it had to be doing a number on her, more than he could imagine. "I, I shouldn't have done that. You need time..to.."

"It's ok, Stefan. You've had to endure so much, the loss of us. I didn't really. It's so strange. I knew I loved you. I knew I missed you. But then it was like watching a sad movie and not my drama at all and it was gone. I was so awful. What I said to you…I'm so sorry…" She trailed off.

She leaned in and kissed him softly, much as he did, not deepening the kiss further than the feeling of them pressing to each other. Pulling back, she said, "I'm sorry you had to go through it."

He gave her a soft smile that even reached his eyes. She smiled lightly in return but it didn't quite radiate through her eyes. There was still so much anguish there, in those deep brown eyes that he could just drown in, laying here with her.

They lay there for quite some time, looking at each other in the moonlit room.

"Stefan?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm not sure what's next. I'm afraid I'll make a bad decision and I'll ruin it."

"Ruin it?"

"I, it's…I don't trust myself." She seemed at a loss for words. "I both want to kiss you and don't want to kiss you. I don't know why."

He licked his lips as he pondered what this could mean, distracted by wanting to kiss her too. "Maybe, it's just a leftover feeling from the sire bond. Your mind was playing tricks on you to want certain things. That's got to leave a mark on you, on your instincts. It will probably pass in time. Or maybe it's just emotional fatigue. Let's not over think it. We'll see, in time." He paused, trailing his thumb across her cheek. "There's no hurry, Elena. No pressure. I'm just so relieved you are you again."

"Am I?"

"Yes. You will be even more so with each passing day."

She watched him, willing herself to have the same belief in her that he did.


	6. Chapter 6

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 6**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! _

Stefan was too concerned to leave Elena alone yet. The sire bond had only been broken hours ago. But he was feeling the itch to hunt. He also knew he'd need his strength to keep up with Elena, to deal with any new repercussions of breaking the sire bond that were yet unknown, especially if she was going to stay on human blood.

He could sublimate the hunger with sleep but they'd slept so much already. They couldn't sleep the entirety of the night after an eight hour nap. They certainly didn't need another full eight hours despite the emotional ride they'd been on. Like she could sense it she spoke. "I think I'm hungry."

"You _think_ you're hungry?"

"I'm still trying to figure out which instincts are real, remember? Even hunger seems…I don't know…off."

"What are you feeling?"

"My mouth is dry, like endlessly dry. My throat aches. My gums, they haven't felt sore like this since I transitioned."

"I'm going to suggest something. But we don't have to do it, ok? Just tell me what you think."

She looked up at him from her position in the nook of his arm as they continued to lie on the bed, he on his back, she nestled against his side. The look on her face was pensive, waiting patiently but really curious what he would say.

"How would you feel about going on a hunt with me?"

It was a quick, almost micro expression but obvious to the two vampires. Her eyes flared and she gave a slight gasp and curl of her lip like the predator she now was and her fingers pressed a little harder against his chest. It was a fleeting reaction but certainly confirmed her desire at the thought to feed.

"I think you can trust that you are definitely feeling hunger to feed. At least your body knows it," he told her.

She gave a soft smirk saying, "Definitely." She swallowed back the urge.

"So what do you want to do about it?"

She knew what he was asking. He wasn't being coy about it. But he did need to know. It was only fair for him to know her choice of feeding options. They stayed looking at each other as she pondered and he tried not to hope biasedly.

"When you asked, I immediately saw prey. And I wanted it badly. And, it was human."

He waited for more, tamping down the urge to be disappointed. She didn't deserve the pressure from him, the guilt.

"But then I also remembered not feeling guilty when feeding, with, you know…"

"You can say his name, Elena, if you want." He reached to gently thread her hair behind her ear and gently trailed fingers across her check as he moved his hand back to resting on his stomach.

She shook her head no. She didn't want to think it, never mind say it. "When I think of then, I don't like them, I don't like me, well her, you know. It wasn't fair. I didn't give hunting animals with you a fair shot."

"I'll be ok, Elena, if you can't..."

"I don't mean it wasn't fair to you, although it wasn't that either. I mean it wasn't fair to me, that I didn't get to try and make that work for me, in this new life of mine, not really. I might be able to make it work. I don't really know."

"I'm not going to pressure you either way. No expectations at all. I'll try so hard but feel free to yell at me any time I'm not living up to that."

"So let's go."

"Really? You are ready?"

She smiled and nodded excited for the chance to hunt, her inner beast anticipating the thrill of the chase. He smiled too, hungrily, for her, and for the hunt, but he kept his desire to maul her with probing kisses in check. They both were off the bed quickly, pulling on shoes, and out the door in a flash.

They sped through the woods for miles, alternating taking the lead. Dang, she's fast, he thought appreciating her physique as she moved past him yet again. Her hair was flying straight behind her like a flag in a strong wind. Stefan wondered if she'd find prey first. He'd only shown her one time so she didn't know all the best locations and tactics yet, at least not those needed in the woods.

She was ahead of him when he heard voices. From years of practice, his first instinct was to veer away and ensure not to be seen. But then it hit him, just a second later, what would be her instinct in the heat of the moment? Catching up to her, he'd found she had not veered away from the voices. She'd turned to move closer to the voices, not farther away. She had also positioned herself up wind of the campsite on a high point with a great view of all paths to her prey. She was ready to leap, taking in their scents, eyes flared and red, fangs extended.

In the distance, the couple was having sex in a sleeping bag under the stars, completely unaware of their audience. Stefan watched her watching them. The show wasn't that enthralling but she was definitely captivated. He was at her side, ready to grab on to her should she make a move. "Hey," he whispered. She immediately spun her face to his. "Breathe," was all he said. He held her eyes, slowly took in a deep breath and let it out. She didn't. She slowly turned back to the couple who were getting more heated and loud. She eyed them hungrily but could hear next to her, Stefan taking these long deep intakes of breath and then slowly letting them out. She slowly began to join in this ritual, all the while watching the couple reach their peak and slowly return to breathing normally post coitus.

Her fangs receded and the blood slowly left her eyes. She slowly licked her now dry lips and turned back to Stefan still quietly watching her. He gave a gentle look, like a welcome back hello, seemingly ever so patient with her. "Thank you," she whispered.

He touched her cheek softly and slid his hand down to hers. "Come on, let's go." He pulled her up to standing. She lightly tugged his hand to stop him and pull him closer. She slid her arms around his waist, hugging him.

"Thank you," she said again. He hugged her back. She squeezed harder like she was hanging on to something more than just him. "Ok, I'm ready. Let's go."

They ran again, deeper into rougher woods, hopefully less likely to run into other humans. Stefan found the deer first. There were at least three to choose from directly ahead of them. They crouched down and watched the animals' instincts on display. The deer were initially alert, showing their first signs of concern.

"Do you remember what I showed you?" he asked mouthing the words. She was already nodding yes before he finished. "Maybe take the smaller doe…" She was answering again before he finished, this time slowly shaking her head no before he'd even finished. A sly grin at the corner of her mouth and her eyes teased him that he better watch and learn. He couldn't help but grin back at her, his blood beginning to heat with the thrill of hunting with her.

Then, as if they'd shared a silent signal they each circled round their prey confusing them enough with an attack from two sides. They each took down their own catch. Stefan, having had decades to hone his skill and style took down the doe with ease. He began to drink relishing the satisfaction it gave to slake his basic thirst. It would never be as completely satisfying as human blood, but then again, no blood was ever really satisfying to him. He always wanted more of it regardless so this would suffice. His quarry was still alive and able to flee once Stefan released it. The doe staggered about confused as to which direction to run, then blindly fled into a heavily wooded stand of trees.

Stefan turned to see Elena. She wasn't far, about twenty yards away. She'd taken down the largest of the deer and was drinking steadily. The beast's heartbeat was fading, slowing but she urged it on with the pressure from her hand on its chest. There was a raw beauty to her, predator taking prey, survival. She wasn't particularly cruel to the doe, considering the lesser of two evils, killing deer vs. killing humans. But the deer was not going to survive this night, he could see that easily.

Elena was lost in the feed. As the last beats of the dying heart faded, she raised her face to the sky, eyes closed, feeling nearly rapturous as the blood travel her body. Her face, wet with blood, glistened under the moonlight. Her fangs were still at the ready. She let the animal slip from her grasp as she opened her eyes and brought her gaze directly to Stefan. She eyed him hungrily.

She stood immediately and he was at her side in a flash. She stared at his beautiful face, blood dripping down his chin. With two hands, she pulled him down by his collar and licked across his chin.

"Better," she murmured then licked him again.

"Better?" he asked huskily.

"The blood, it's not as good. But this helps." She licked again then planted a deeply probing kiss on him. His hands were on her hips for balance as they ravaged each other's mouths. Stopping briefly, she pulled back to look at his face. She'd felt more blood was on his face. She realized she must have been covered with it and had then covered him with it. Emotions changing in nanoseconds, she was instantly panicky and about to apologize.

"No," he cried out firmly and slammed into her with another heated round of kissing. Her guilt assuaged for now, she responded hungrily. Her hands were groping him, pressing her to his groin. He had a hand in her hair, holding her head, not letting her mouth escape his, while his other hand squeezed her ass.

They heard it at the same time, a growl. It was not from one of them. It was still a ways off. It stopped them instantly putting them on their guard.

"Is that…?" she asked quietly.

"Wolf."

" You mean..?" she looked quickly back at the moon checking how full it was.

"No, just wolf…it's downwind of us. Probably smells the blood." They both looked down at the carcass Elena had left. Before she could transition to guilt, he brought her face back to his. "Circle of life, Elena. The wolf would find its prey no matter what we did." She nodded understanding. "Come on. We'll stop at the creek on the way back to rinse off." She nodded again and took his offered hand. They ran together, hand in hand until narrowed paths and jumping ravines required they let go.

Stopping at the creek, they each leaned in to scrubs hands and face in the cold water. It felt refreshing, not that the cold was that noticeable to them. It was the feeling of erasing the evidence of their kills, well, the evidence of her kill and his hunt and release.

She smiled at Stefan now, looking shiny and bright under the moonlight, his countenance all youth and sex appeal. He too smiled at her but underneath he was worried for her, worried what was next when they got back home, to his home, also his brother's home. And would this blood be enough for her?

They ran all the way back, laughing along the way as each jokingly tried to trip up the other or outdo the other's last move. Arriving in the back yard, they stopped to sit on the steps of the patio and enjoy the last of the dark night before the sun would begin to change the sky from black to blue. The stars were so clear.

"Do you remember seeing the stars for the first time when you turned?" she asked.

"Vividly. I thought I should be able to reach out and touch them, or climb high enough or jump high enough to reach them. They were so beautiful, crystal clear. Still are."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." They stayed there for a while. It really was a gorgeous night. As the minutes ticked by, they each wondered if the other realized they were both waiting for the other to make then next move.

Stefan didn't know what she wanted to do next. Sure, they _slept_ together earlier. But really slept, not like he hoped they would at some point. He could wait. He was skilled with denying himself, as long as nothing got started. That worked with both sex and blood.

Elena didn't know what she wanted to do next either. They'd made out, hungrily, tonight. It was all part of the hunt, right? Could it be something more already? Could she really want that with him already? What did that say about her? She'd just slept with his brother. Not willingly, of course. Well not unwillingly, it wasn't like he forced her or anything. But she didn't have free will, yes, that was it. But now she did, right? What does she want? Can she trust the passion she felt earlier?

"OK," she said suddenly. He seemed a little startled from his thoughts at her sudden words. He looked at her questioningly, brows raised. "I'm just going to tell you what I'm thinking. I'm at that same point again, not sure if I can trust my impulses, my instincts." She paused, bracing for the truth. "I want you. You know that right?"

"I do now."

"I do, of course I do. I wanted you before turning and after turning. Yes, even after turning. It wasn't until later that it got…lost." She got up, anxious, needing space to walk, to think. "Even early on when I was having trouble adjusting, when I was really hungry but didn't know how to fix it, I still wanted you. It was just that something kept messing it up. It was like,…" She stopped directly in front of him. "Crap, sorry, but I'm just going to say it. It was like getting cock-blocked every five minutes."

Stefan let out a good chuckle, nodding like he totally understood. She laughed; relieved at his response and feeling like she could continue uninhibited. She began pacing again, really getting amped up. "We're in the woods and I think ooh great, sex in the woods, then I'm vomiting. Then we're in bed and you, mm, and me, and I'm about to finally have you, like this, and then I'm hallucinating from werewolf venom! Oh, and that night, Mr. you were really going to be in for it." Stefan let out another laugh, pleased and admiring her expression of desire.

She stopped still. His laughter subsided as he took in her change of attitude. "Then, then my first time, wasn't…" The words "with you" went unsaid. "And I don't bring it up to talk about it or make you angry or jealous. It's just that I don't know if _how_ I did it was me, this me, would I have been like that with you, would I have been different? I don't know what to do." She stopped upon seeing him look away from her. "Oh my god, it's too much, I've said too much…" She came to kneel in front of him, her hands on his knees.

It was quiet for a few moments. Stefan had looked away but then looked back at her. "I want to be here for you Elena. And if you need to talk about it, we will. I can't lie and say thinking about you with anyone else is in any way what I want to do."

"I'm so sorry, Stef."

"No, it's ok. Let me finish. If what you are saying is, at least what I think you are saying,… I think it might be best to think about it this way. Your first time as a vampire wasn't you, not really. But I get it. There's bound to be some cross-over between what _you_ would do vs. _sired you_, in bed." He had to visibly contain his anger at the thought of her with his brother. She squeezed and stroked his knees gently, soothingly and winced seeing his pain. He took a deep breath and finished his thought. "But, maybe, just maybe you could think about it like that, that it wasn't really your choice, what _you_ wanted. And then, when you want to, to be yourself completely, with, someone…then that will truly be your first time, in a way."

"With _someone_?"

"Well, I, I didn't want to presume…" He smiled self-consciously.

"It will be with you, Stefan, if you'll still have me."

His hands came to rest on hers.

"When you're ready. I'll be waiting."


	7. Chapter 7

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 7 (Adult Content)**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! _

_A/N – There is strong sexual content herein. It is meant to be tasteful while still being erotic. I believe it is essential to the story, the healing, and the adult relationship that Stefan and Elena had and hopefully will have again. Don't read further if you have concerns._

"When you're ready. I'll be waiting."

His words tugged at her heart. She looked into his eyes longingly. Coming forward, her hands still on his knees, she leaned in to reach his lips. She kissed him, softly at first, then more intensely. She began to kiss and lightly pull at each lip. First, his top lip, then his fuller bottom lip, then the bottom again, then top, sucking and toying with him. She eased her way further up to straddling his legs and sitting in his lap facing him as they kissed. Her arms slid up to circle his neck when she moved to deepen the kiss. When her hands had left his knees, he'd slid his hands around her hips and steadied her in his lap. Her tongue teased at the corners of his mouth then dove in as his mouth allowed entry. He groaned at her increasing intensity.

They were still on the steps off the patio, under the stars. When he could muster the will, Stefan pulled back a bit gruffly holding her shoulders away from him. He looked up at the night sky.

"What's wrong?" she asked, surprised at stopping.

"Nothing, nothing's wrong. I just want you to be sure. It hasn't even been a day…" he said. "Don't do this just for me…"

"I'm not," she answered sounding more defensive than she intended. A small part of her wondered if that was a lie, a white lie, tiny compared to others…or was she really ready…

"Elena, please, just be sure. You aren't the only one who might behave a little differently…now that we are both…"

"Ok,…" she said but more like a question. She started to lean in to him again but his hands kept her at a distance.

"If we start this,…" he continued, "…I'm not going to want to stop. I mean, I'd never force you. I just, I may not always be strong enough, clear headed enough to do the right thing." He looked at her longingly, almost desperate for her. "I've missed you so much." He weakened for a moment and pulled her toward him, kissing her again and again but not releasing his hold on her shoulders. He so wanted to get lost in her. He pulled away again trying to hang on to his wits. "I just need to know you are ready, really ready…"

Her mind raced with visions of Stefan in bed, his rock hard body contrasted with his tenderness, his lips on her body burning her skin as he rocked into her and his face when he reached that moment of release. She definitely wanted that, him. Slowly, she brought her hands to his cheeks, palming them and he eased his hold on her. "I want you, Stefan. All of you." She kissed him longingly. His arms came around her back, pulling her torso forward and pressing her core to his. Lips were joined in searing kisses while hands wandered and groped. Kisses wandered desperately down necks. Fingers ran through and tugged on hair. If air had been required, it might not have been allowed. So was the heat between them.

The make-out continued as Stefan stood up holding her tightly against him. He turned around and walked them up the few steps onto the patio. Slowly but snugly, he slid her down his body to standing. The kept kissing and kissing even as he walked her backward to the glass doors which he managed to open without incident.

They were just about to step over the threshold when she stopped, her hands on the door frame prohibiting her from entering. "What? What is it?" he asked panting, concerned.

She looked alarmed for a second. "Nothing. It's nothing." But she didn't let go of the doorway and her hands shook a little. Stefan slowly dropped his arms and his gaze. He was frowning, maybe angry. "No, no, Stefan, don't stop. I want this, I do. I want you." She reached for him, touching him wherever she could before he'd pull the hand, or the arm she'd touched away from her.

"Elena…" he snapped, trying to stop her with his voice.

"No, no I do. I just, in the moment, it was just a flash, it's gone, I'm good…" she pleaded.

"A flash of what, Elena?"

"Stef, please..." She didn't want him to be angry. Was he?

He could see the worry on her face. He tried to calm himself but the quieter voice almost seemed worse. "I'm not angry, Elena, I'm frustrated. A flash of what?"

There was a pause, but she knew he meant business. She wasn't going to lie to him. She'd been honest and straightforward so far. Why stop now? She took a breath and said, "A bed."

The image then flashed in his mind too. He knew what she meant and he didn't like it one bit. She didn't say _your_ bed. She meant another bed, specifically another bed in this house. He stood there, his mouth agape as he realized how that might give her pause. But what it meant was the real question.

"You know how images just come to you? That's all it was. I was anticipating, you and me, in bed, and then something about going inside to make love, it just, flashed and I panicked, for just a second."

"I understand. I get it. It's ok," he said quietly and stiffly, resigned to not being with her tonight, resigned to reliving the image of her in Damon's bed. He trailed fingers down her arm and dropped his hands away as if in defeat.

"No, Stefan, you don't. I still want this. I want my memories, my life to be with you, in your bed," she again pleaded. "Our bed," she added softly. "I know it's stupid, but it was kind of a good thing, scary but good. I panicked because I did not want to go there. It was like having déjà vu. It was like my subconscious knew all along not to go there, you know, but some kind of fight or flight instinct was now able to stop me when the image flashed. This makes so much sense to me now. This is exactly what I was trying to explain before about trying to figure out my instincts, my body and my mind, how it played tricks on me. I'm sorry. I don't know if I'll have other times where I'm having these odd impulses, but I do _know_, Stefan, I want to go with you, inside, now." She stated the last part rather fiercely. She gave him a moment to respond. She'd said her peace and hoped he would understand.

"We could stay at _your_ house, if that would be better..." She smiled at how sweet he was being despite how incredibly uncomfortable this all must be for him to consider. It was a really generous offer to avoid a Salvatore bed in this process. Or was he really asking if they'd been together in her bed too..?

When she reached for him, he let her this time. She touched his arm and lingered. "We can easily stay there, no worries. We will. And it will be fine. But I need to face this now. I want my life back, Stefan." She held out her other hand to him. He took it. He let her lead, let her set the pace.

They walked upstairs, hand in hand straight to his room, not looking back. He wondered if she thought about what he needed, how much of this he could handle, but he pushed it down and out of his mind considering it being selfish of him.

He closed the door behind them before she led him to the bed still holding his hand. "You know, before I turned, I loved everything about being with you, making love with you." He reached to touch her face and trailed his thumb across her lower lip. Her tongue lightly moistened the pad of his thumb and her lip. "I had always wanted to know how it felt for you, the sensations you'd feel touching me. You never wanted to stop touching me."

She reached for the hem of his shirt and peeled it up and over his head, slowly exposing more of his body. She took in, and let out, an appreciative breath at the sight of his bare chest, washboard abs, broad shoulders, and his amazing arms. She trailed her fingers down his jaw and proceeded to explore each well-defined muscle on view for her to enjoy. After lightly skimming his oh so smooth skin over rock hard muscles, she spoke in a sultry whisper. "I don't think I ever told you how seeing your body made me so incredibly hot for you." He smiled a little shyly at the not so subtle compliment but otherwise remained still. "But you knew that…" She kissed his chest as her fingers roamed down to his belt. "And the way you'd love me, tasted me," she licked his skin. "Hhmm." She added teeth, nipping lightly then kissing him. "I understand now. I don't want to stop touching you either." Her hands teased lower, unzipping his jeans to expose him. "You're teasing me now, aren't you? Not touching me back…"

He smirked lightly. "Yes and no. I don't want to pressure you." He hissed as she gave him a squeeze with the hand down his jeans. Returning to kissing his chest, she stroked him encouragingly.

"What you said before, how would you be different now that we are both turned?"

"You'll just have to wait and see."

"Stefan," she gave him another squeeze to make him hiss or moan, whichever he felt at her touch. "Please make love to me."

He looked at her, eyed her up and down, making sure she knew what she was getting into and not putting on the brakes any time soon. Suddenly his hands were on her, grasping her by the shoulders and stopping her movements. He planted a kiss so longing and yet sweet on her mouth. He pulled her against his bare chest holding her so tightly, if she'd been human, she'd have not been able to endure the crush. It was as if they were somehow molded as one and she was dizzied in his arms. It wasn't from lack of oxygen. It was the overwhelming intensity of sensation that seemed to explode within her every time he touched her, kissed her, held her.

He pulled out of the kiss, hands still on her shoulders. Eyeing her shirt, already a goner after Elena's messy kill earlier that evening, slowly, he threaded his fingers into and along the collar. He pulled at it, dragging it down to her shoulders, stretching and tearing it in the process. "When I would think about us together, both turned, in some ways, it was very much the same, because…" He got very close to her ear. "I always make love to you when I'm with you, Elena," his voice deep and sensual, his words tickled at her ear. She hummed at the sensations as he nipped at her neck, soothing each love bite with his tongue. Electricity ran through her.

He looked her in the eye again. "But I imagined, even back then…a certain desire of yours would become more heightened." Now at her other ear, he again whispered low, "You like to be taken, Elena." She sighed in longing. "You like to know how much you are mine and I am yours. Am I right?" She moaned again at his hand on her throat, his lips possessing her again and her arms reaching to pull his groin against her. "I'll take that as a yes…" He tore her shirt down further, within a fraction of baring her breasts completely. She gasped in pleasure, her arms momentarily trapped by her shirt despite having the strength to get free if she wanted.

He kissed her all over her bared skin as his fingers traced lines and circles across any space he wasn't kissing. Slowly he turned her round and round, kissing every bare spot along her chest, her back, her neck, her mouth all the while his hands roamed her body, kneading, fondling, squeezing, pressing her to his chest as he turned her and allowing her to feel all the incredible sensations as her new self. Stopping the last turn with her back to his chest, he suddenly opened her jeans and pulled them and her panties down her legs. She moaned at the sensation, stepping out of them with his help. He spun her back to facing him again and he finished off her shirt and bra with one last tearing motion. Again she gasped stared at Stefan with unadulterated desire. Her hands free to roam, she pushed his jeans down over his hips hurriedly. His hands roamed her nakedness as she worked to free him once and for all from clothes.

They were on the bed in a flash. He was on top of her, dominating her, taking her. It's what she wanted. She didn't want any more foreplay. She needed him now and told him so. He needed her yesterday, the day before…

It was heated, deep, and loving. Their eyes, their longing looks were blazing in their intensity. It was still love making regardless of the ferocity and speed of their thrusts. The index, the scale had just changed. Elena's vampire visage emerged without a passing thought. Stefan responded in kind and he rode her faster.

Elena came first, whaling her pleasure louder than her human self would have. Her fangs grazed Stefan's neck sending a shiver through him and sending him over the edge. He roared out the long awaited release. "I Love you!" he cried out even if it was only recognizable to her. She kissed and nibbled at his neck when he collapsed on top of her.

"I love you, Stefan, love you, only you…" She gently but firmly pulled his mouth to hers, palming his cheeks to kiss his mouth and his face all over. "You. Mmm. Love you. Just you. Stefan…"

He was now recovered enough to hold his head to hers, returning the kisses she landed on his mouth, accepting those that didn't. She continued her cooing words, over and over. He couldn't help himself and let a question slip out. "Are you trying to convince me or you?"

As she realized what he'd said, she stopped her kisses and looked hurt. He was instantly sorry and a guilty look flushed his face. "I'm sorry," he offered quickly regretting his words. Using her new found strength, she startled him by flipping them over.

She stayed watching him from above for quite some time, straddling him, hands positioned at his shoulders. Anger, hurt, they seemed very similar to her in the moment. Finally she spoke. "Maybe I deserved that," she said although the bitterness in her tone said it still hurt. "I guess it's a sign of my guilt to say it like that…_just you, only you_…even though it's true."

"It's my fault. I was being petty." She looked at him with genuine curiosity, wanting him to explain further. "When you said it, it sounded like a comparison, not like you just plain loved me."

"Oh, no, no, not at all. I didn't mean it that way at all." She leaned in closer, fingers petting quickly at the tension in his brow, across his mouth, so wanting him not to think that she was even thinking about anyone else but Stefan.

"It's my own baggage. I was feeling the comparison long before and maybe some pressure to make sure you really wanted me. Making sure I made you feel it."

"I didn't mean to…"

"No, it was self-imposed, I'm sure of it. Me and my guilt." He rolled his eyes at himself and let out a sigh.

"No, I pushed you to do this tonight…I'm sorry…I should have asked…I thought I was just pushing me, working it out…I'm so sorry. I should have realized. You were different, and wonderful. But I want _you_, Stefan. I want you to be _you_. _You_ don't have to _prove_ _anything_ to _me_." It went unsaid, but he realized she believed she had something to prove to him, thus the constant reassurances that she loved him…_just him_…It started making sense now. His hands reached for her.

"I'd like to try again."

Her face lit up, so happy and relieved that he could move forward from what she viewed as her mistake. "Really?"

"Yes. Like us."

She nodded, so happy and in awe of him. She wanted to cry; she looked like she was about to cry. He pulled her down to him and stopped her with a kiss. It started slow and tender. Her hair fell forward around them, shielding them. It so reminded them both of the past. They shared a soft smile in between kisses in their hidden world.

"Ooh, under the covers then…" she smiled mischievously. "I used to be cold so we'd be under the covers." He chuckled lightly at her, but it was a great idea to help them feel more like _them_.

He opened the bedding next to them and she crawled off him and scurried under the covers. She then helped him join her, moving the bedding when he pushed up his body and slid underneath. They snuggled close, face to face, taking their time to enjoy just being together, feeling their bodies pressed together. He stayed watching her, gauging her reactions as his fingers began to toy with her skin. She trailed fingers down his cheek, across his lip. He sucked a finger into his mouth, using his tongue in ways he planned to use on other parts of her. She gasped at the feel of it, the imagery sending shivers to her core.

Removing her finger, she replaced it with her mouth, then her tongue. Her hands found his hair and began massaging and circling his scalp as they kissed. He loved that, she knew, she remembered. His hands caressed her in return, groping her buttocks, pulling at her cheeks and hips and alternating sliding up and down her back. He was already hard for her, but he wanted something else before once again entering her. He needed to taste her, really taste her.

He rolled her completely on her back and pressed her body into the mattress, making sure his legs were between hers. He broke their kiss and began moving down her neck, kissing as he moved south. His hands joined in and began toying with her breasts as he kissed one and fondled the other. It wasn't long and he was descending further. When he finally neared his destination, he teased and avoided the very spot she knew was his intended target. She was writhing, half in ecstasy, half pleading for relief. There were fingers, hands, tongue, lips, all simply driving her mad. Never had she felt anything like this. And then…

Warmth and wetness flicked across that spot, the spot. Elena nearly flew off the bed, sitting up straight suddenly with an exclamation of, "OH MY GOD!" If Stefan hadn't been where he was, she was sure she'd have found herself across the room. But Stefan didn't stop. He nudged her back to lying down which she did rolling back slowly, gasping as he continued loving her with his tongue. He slowed to prolong her pleasure until she was begging, just like old times. "Please, fu…, Stef…" she gasped. His fingers joined in and soon had her throbbing with pleasure. She bucked in rhythm with him, hands in his hair, pressing him to her in just the right way.

She exploded, screaming and in spasm, completely and utterly without any control of her body. She was shaking like she never had before as she rode out the most amazing orgasm. She was sure no human had ever come close to that experience, maybe not even another vampire.

Stefan slowly climbed up to see her face and was pleased with her look of utter awe and wonder. She couldn't speak. A tear or two had escaped from the corners of her eyes. Watching her, he slowly pressed himself at her core and slid inside. She gasped, her head tipping back as well as her eyes rolling back, her mouth opening wide as if she silently was saying, "AAaaaaahhhhh…."

In and out, slow at first, he set their pace, building, and building her back up along with his own pleasure. His whispers were soft, snuck in between kisses. "I love you, Elena." "So beautiful." "Feels so go-od…" And then she in return, "Love you, Stefan, Stefan, Stefan…yes, Stefan. Harder, Stefan…" Her tears were flowing now, definitely happy tears. She was so overwhelmed with the beauty of it all, the love, the ecstasy, the intensity.

They both had speed, strength, and endurance now so he brought them home with a flourish. They finished in a frenzy of Stefan's thrusts, Elena's gyrating hips and sexy talk, and a healthy dose of love.

Elena continued to weep happily. To date, this was the experience of her life. She was home again, or maybe for the first time.


	8. Chapter 8

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 8 (some minor adult content)**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything I've seen in the preview for the 410. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! _

They lay together afterwards, bathing in the afterglow. She loved feeling the weight of him atop her and wouldn't let him roll away. He tried a second time to slowly shift at least part of him off her and she whined, half teasing half serious.

"Elena, I must be crushing you."

"Nonsense. I'm strong now, remember." She smiled and squeezed him harder with both legs and arms.

"Ok, ok, easy there," he half chuckled and half gasped at her grip around his waist.

Her smile faded slowly and she looked at him more seriously, almost sadly.

"What is it?" he asked softly.

She was trying to identify the feeling as well. "I don't think I could take being separated from you again. A part of me is so tired. I don't want any more drama. No more anything other than this, us, you and me. I know it's too much to ask. But it's what I feel."

"I think I know what you mean. And it would be nice for a while…but…"

"No…, no but's…" she tried to silence him with a kiss.

"We can't hide from life forever."

"Why not?" she pouted but knowing he was right.

"Hey, I'm not in any hurry to share this time with the world yet."

"Good," she smiled at him.

"But," he said, she grimaced. "Your friends and family are going to want back in and likely soon."

She suddenly thought of Jeremy. "Oh my god, I completely forgot about Jeremy. I hope he's ok. He's probably…" She trailed off because everything she'd thought of saying next would involve hearing from or about _him_, the other brother.

"It's ok, Elena," he said nuzzling a soft kiss at her check and neck. "I can check on Jeremy for you. Don't even think about it. I'll call up there a little later and see what's what. He's probably asleep still this early anyway."

"What time is it?"

"Almost 5 am. That cathartic 8 hour nap yesterday really has us all messed up time-wise."

"Or maybe it was everything else we did all night long," she said sexily if a little sleepily as she tapped a finger at his nose then trailed it along his mouth.

"Are you tired?" he asked

"A little."

"Then sleep. There's time before the outside world comes knocking, if they even come." He kissed her lightly and used the distraction to flip her on top of him. "But I'd rather sleep this way," he teased. "Or spooning, that works too."

She smiled down at him, enjoying the feeling of her body lazing on his. "I guess I could stay here for a while," she smilingly replied. She kissed him lightly then shifted slightly to rest her head on his chest, nuzzling in at his neck. He played with her hair a bit before wrapping his arms completely around her and closing his eyes, ready to doze off. It didn't take long and they both were on the verge of sleep.

"Stef…" she mumbled quietly.

"Hhm?"

"Don't leave me."

His eyes opened wondering why she would say this.

"Never." He petted her soothingly for a while, pondering the reasons behind her words and eventually dozed off with her.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A few hours later, Stefan awoke, alone. He could hear the shower running. He stretched and yawned before making his way to the bath to join Elena. Padding across the room while running his hands through his hair, he took notice of their clothes strewn about, including Elena's torn shirt and presumably torn bra. He didn't remember unhooking it so it too was probably ruined. He wondered if there was a complete set of clothes for her stored in his room.

Upon entering the bath, he thought he heard her say something, make some sound. He could see her through the glass walls of the steamy shower, her back was to him. For a second, he thought he smelled blood. He looked around wondering where it was coming from. Did she have a blood bag in here? He couldn't spot it if she did. And the scent, it wasn't human, was it…? No. Elena?

He closed the distance between him and the shower in a flash finally fully awake and alert. The steamy glass of the shower had shielded some of her from view before he approached. Now, he could see that her back looked red in some spots but it was fading quickly. She sensed him and turned away as if she needed to rinse at another angle.

"Stefan, you startled me. Are you coming in?"

Her voice sounded calm but yet not. He opened the shower door and quickly turned her toward him. He eyed her up and down suspiciously. "Elena, what have you been doing?" He'd just barely caught a glimpse of her skin rubbed so raw but healing too quickly to understand what was happening.

She snapped at him. "I'm not doing anything, Stefan. I'm showering. Is that not ok with you?"

He realized in his concern for her that he sounded really overbearing. He softened but just a little. "I smelled blood, Elena."

"Really?" She tried to play surprised as she sniffed for any sign of it.

"Elena, it was yours. I've been on this planet long enough to know what I smelled."

She grimaced, caught. "I don't want to talk about it Stefan. Can you ease up, please?" She moved around him as if to leave him in the shower.

He looked genuinely taken aback. This didn't sound like _his_ Elena. Then again, since she'd turned, there were bound to be differences that he hadn't yet experienced, that she hadn't yet experienced due to the sire bond controlling her. He stopped her by gently taking her arm. "You're the one who told me not to leave you, Elena. And if you need a few minutes fine, but we are going to talk about this, whatever this was." He slowly released her arm to let her leave. He turned away to put his face under the spray.

She stood there for a moment, regretting how she'd spoken to him. They'd come so far in just one day. How could she snap at him like that? She'd almost slapped away his hand from her arm too but just the thought of doing it had shocked her and she reigned in the urge. Still feeling quite moody, she didn't trust herself to not do it again so she just stayed still, evaluating her actions and reactions. He began to shampoo his hair. He knew she was still there, in the shower, watching him. If this was all the space she needed, it was fine by him. _Take your time_, he thought, hoping she would. He scrubbed his scalp, taking his time, giving her time, and then rinsed his hair.

"I could wash your back for you," she suggested softly.

He stilled for a second turning his head in her direction but not looking directly at her and said, "That'd be nice."

She walked up to stand just behind him reaching her hands around his waist for him to place the soap in one hand and a loofa in the other. They'd done this before. She began lathering and soaping him up and down his back and even his bum. This went on for quite some time. He didn't stop her even though his back side was more than squeaky clean by now. Eventually, she gave him the soap and loofa back the same way she'd received them so he could continue washing elsewhere. But she didn't stop rubbing him down with her hands, gently massaging his muscles from his neck down to his lower back.

When she slowed, he leaned forward to let the shower rinse his back. When complete, he leaned back upright and was about to turn around when her arms came back around his waist and she hugged him from behind. She wasn't quite ready to face him yet. Her body was slippery and soft against his more muscular form. Her arms came around him and angle up onto his chest pulling him tightly against her. Her face was turned to one side, her cheek resting on his back. "I'm sorry," she whispered. Stefan let out a sigh, closed his eyes at the feel of her, and crossed his arms across hers on his chest. He pressed her arms against him savoring her hold around him. "I don't want to be a burden to you, Stefan. I don't want to have to be fixed all the time."

"You are not a burden, Elena," he said quietly, wanting to turn and face her but her grip on him made choose to wait. Let her get it out her way, he thought. It was quiet for a minute. She didn't say more. She loosened her hold on him so he turned as she dropped her arms. She looked like the one burdened, rather worn and tired emotionally, but still incredibly beautiful even when in pain. He waited for her to speak. She swallowed, looked at him, looked away, then back again. Finally she sighed and prepared to tell him.

She couldn't do it, not yet. Instead, she placed her hands on his chest and leaned against him hoping his natural reaction would be to hold her. He did. The warm water rained down on them. She pressed closer, applying just a bit more pressure against him and slid her arms around his waist. She lightly shifted her body, slipping against him softly, as they remained in their embrace. These subtle shifts, her soft breasts, her silky smooth skin, her hips gently moving, all slippery against him were quite a distraction. She could feel his body reacting to her and raised her head to smile up at him.

"Stefan, kiss me." Her hands slid down to stroke his behind and he groaned softly.

"So the plan is to distract me with sex, then?"

"Is it working?" she asked as she massaged him a bit more intimately and kissed his chest.

"We'll talk later," was all he could gasp out before bringing their lips together in a heated kiss. They kissed a while, but she had other plans. Soon she was pressing him against the wall and kissing down his body. No longer human, she was able to do things to him she hadn't been able to before. When she took him in her mouth, he almost broke one of the side shower heads when his hand tried to grasp at the wet shower walls. It was insane how good she made him feel. She did not relent on driving him mad with desire. Despite his warning, she finished him that way with his hands in her hair and her name on his lips.

Standing up, she looked at his face, pleased with his naked abandon. He pulled her against him, to lean her body against his as he still leaned and braced himself against the shower wall. Recovering slowly, he looked down at her sweet face. "You are definitely not a burden…jeez that was amazing."

"I'm glad. I'll let you finish showering now."

"Wait, what? No, no…" he said trying to stop her from leaving the shower.

"Stef, it's ok. I wanted to do that for you. I love you." She kissed him softly but looked a little sad through her soft smile. "Don't worry. I'll take a rain check for later if you like. Just not right now, k?"

She left the shower and toweled off, leaving him to finish. He took his time. He wanted to give her the time and space she obviously was asking for from him. He could tell she was thinking through what they would no doubt talk about later. By the time he emerged to dress, her hair was dry-ish, she was half dressed, just her jeans lying on the bed for her to step into. She was sitting at the end of the now made bed, eerily still, waiting for him. She was looking straight at him. Wrapped in towel, wrapped low around his waist, he headed over to her with a question on his face. "You ok?"

"Yes, well as good as can be expected, I guess. I'm ready…to talk…when you are."

"Ok."

"I figured if I have to go through more therapy, I think I need to lie down or at least sit." He smirked a little at her, trying to not laugh at her plight but she was too cute in that moment making sarcastic jokes.

He sat on the bed with her and waited. She didn't start. She seemed to be struggling with starting. She let out an exasperated sigh and let herself fall back on the bed. "Ok, maybe lying down would be better." He joined her, settled on his side next to her, his head propped up on one hand. She turned her gaze to him and said, "You know, this might be a little easier if you weren't lying there like a super model."

"I can get dressed." He looked so sweet making the offer that it just made him all the sexier to her.

"Thanks but I might lose my nerve." She cleared her throat and dove in. "This morning, I got a text, from Jeremy and another one then from Matt. They were basically asking what the heck was going on." Stefan looked at her with a question so she continued. "_He's_ _there_ and they said he seems…off..."

"Wait, Matt's where?"

"At the lake. But, that's not what I meant…" She swallowed and pursed her lips. Pointedly she said, "_He's_ back at the lake, training Jeremy."

Recognition came and he chose his words carefully. "Oh, you mean,…", the words _my brother_ went unsaid. "Ok, but why is Matt there?"

"Helping, I guess," she surmised.

This didn't explain what she was doing in the shower though. "Ok..," he said in a way that asked her to continue.

"You are going to think I'm crazy. Maybe I am…but… When I start to think about the sire bond…and really it's when I think about…_him_, I just want to scream. And it's not his fault. He didn't know any better than the rest of us, right? But then I get suspicious and think maybe he did, or should have known. Should he have known? Why didn't he know?"

She paused thinking, struggling with the possible answers. It may have been a rhetorical question or maybe she wanted Stefan to answer but he waited for her to go on. "I certainly don't know the answer. There's a part of me that feels sorry for him. Of course that means I'm assuming it was real for him and that he didn't know how wrong it was. But Stefan, there is this other part of me that is just seething. I want to rip something apart or scream bloody murder at the top of my lungs. How could he not have known that at least something was wrong? I chose you and then suddenly it's all reversed? Wouldn't that give just about any one cause to wonder?"

She stopped for a moment trying to calm down her now very tense body. Her eyes closed and she took a cleansing breath. Opening her eyes and staring up at the ceiling, she admitted the most painful elements she was dealing with at the moment. "I feel violated, Stefan. I feel shame. And I'm just so angry." A tear escaped from the corner of her eye. He gently dabbed away the tear with the back of his hand as he lightly stroked her cheek. She turned to see eyes so sad for her, wishing he could take away her pain. They were quiet for a few moments. When it seemed that she had said all she wanted to say, he spoke quietly.

"Can I share something with you?" She nodded and rolled to her side to face him. "I certainly can't truly know what this is like for you. I think I can at least relate on some level. When I was compelled and then freed when I turned, I experienced some of the same kinds of feelings. I felt violated by Katherine forcing me to accept her and shame for all I'd done. I hated her to the point that I nearly lost my way, lost who I was, or really who I so desperately wanted to be."

"Sounds worse for you since she knew exactly how evil she was being."

"Maybe, maybe not. I think it's different for a woman." Elena was about to interrupt him thinking he shouldn't minimize how wronged he was by Katherine just because he was male, but Stefan continued. "Yes, I know that's no excuse for what she did and it's not fair that it's different, it just is. But my point is I let it ruin me for a time. I let the anger and rage I felt take over. The way I hurt myself and others may be different than what anyone else might do when they felt abused and angry, but it's no less valid of a reaction."

She let her lids closely lightly. He knew. He'd figured she'd hurt herself. Again, she was ashamed.

"I didn't intend to hurt myself," she said softly. "I mean I didn't plan it." She looked back up at him then away again, eyes downward, almost closed. "I got the texts and I got nervous. I was afraid to respond which made me mad, so mad at myself, it was way overboard." She shot a look up at Stefan as she smirked out, "I just love these heightened emotions." She paused and got serious again. "So then I'm mad and showering, and I think about all those questions, why didn't he know about the sire bond and all that, and the next thing I know I'm scrubbing the heck out of my skin, to the point that it hurts, but a good hurt, you know? Like I'm scrubbing it all away… Inside I'm raging, boiling, and trying to hold it in but can't. Suddenly I wanted to bite something so bad and the only thing that was there was me. Without even a hesitation, I bit my arm. It was the strangest feeling. Like relief. I watched it heal and realized I wasn't as riled up any more, so I did it one more time. Then you were there."

"I understand the feeling. The want to bite, tear into something sometimes…"

"But why right then? I get that I'm an emotional basket case, but I'm mad, why not the urge to punch a hole in the wall or something?"

"It's all part of the blurring of emotions. You know how we change during sex? Same thing."

"Huh,…" she said pondering but not quite sure she got it. "It makes more sense to me during sex than me in a shower pissed off."

"You've never been through something like this before, and certainly never as a vampire."

"No, I haven't…"

"It's like reaching the peak of your emotions, whatever the emotion is, and the only way to let it out is by doing something extreme…"

"Like biting…hmm, Ok, I get it." She added, "You're pretty good at this, you know, did you ever want to be a shrink…? Vampire therapy, an untapped market…"

He smiled at her additional attempt to add a little levity to their very serious conversation. "Elena, I am no shrink. Besides, I'm sleeping with the patient. If it hadn't been for Lexi I would never have recovered. What I do know is that I want to be whatever you need, do whatever helps you move past the pain you are feeling so you can get back to a life that you want."

"Me too. Like I said, I want my life back."

"I really want you not to hurt yourself even if you do heal instantly. There's got to be better ways to work it out. Can I make a suggestion?"

"Of course. Please"

"I've always heard that you've got to name it to own it. Until then, you can't move past it. I think you named what you are feeling, shame, anger, violated… Maybe another step would be being able to name where each of those is directed."

"You mean, say his name."

"I mean wherever they need to be directed, when you are ready." He actually wasn't only thinking of his brother. She may also realize she's angry with others, maybe at him, maybe even with herself.

He'd learned so much by how his best friend had helped him. If it hadn't been for Lexi, he would never have recovered. Stefan would do whatever Elena needed to help her just as Lexi had helped him, even if that meant Elena would for a time be mad at everyone, including him.


	9. Chapter 9

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 9 (adult content annotated as usual if you want to skip)**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm not including anything after episode 409. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! Extra A/N – don't get mad, healing can be painful…and I wrote this before some of the rants I've seen but it's a little scary that some others had the same reaction as I did to a certain something Stefan did…but in the end, I'm still all about Stefan, PW, and Stelena…remember, it's just fiction…_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 9**_

That was a really good talk, really. They both felt better for it. Stefan had shared some experiences that she could relate to and showed he understood in part what she was going through. Elena was working through her feelings in a relatively healthy way. Sure she'd had the episode in the shower ending with snapping at Stefan. But, she worked it through, evaluated her feelings, the reasons behind her feelings, and came to a level of understanding. It was just the beginning certainly, but a good beginning.

She leaned in to thank Stefan properly with a kiss. They remained canoodling, talking, making plans for the day and deciding if they both should take a trip to the lake. Elena continued to worry about Jeremy and all that seeing him involved. Seeing Damon was not an appealing thought. Elena wasn't sure she could handle it. What would she say? What would he say? How would they act? What if they disagreed on plans, on Jeremy, on the cure…? They decided that indecision in and of itself was an answer for the moment. She wasn't ready yet. They could always go up later in the afternoon if she changed her mind.

_MMMMMMMM starts here_

Stefan was still basically naked lying facing her, except for the towel around his hips. Her jeans weren't on yet. It would be so easy to… Images of a quickie and more flashed in her mind. Her hands were resting on his chest. She slid a leg over his hip seductively. Her fingers began to gently trail his pecs and tease his nips. A sexy smirk found his lips. She leaned in to kiss him good and proper this time. It was a tasty kiss, all heat and tease, tongue and deep. He held her face and moaned as she explored his mouth. She hummed and let her hands roam down his chest to the fold of the towel at his waist. They both opened their eyes and stared intently. A mischievous smile teased at her mouth and eyes. She slipped a hand lower between them, applied a good tug, and the towel was stripped away, releasing Stefan. She pushed the towel completely away, momentarily lifting her leg higher to slide her hands down and bare his behind. His hands moved from palming her cheeks, sliding down her back to pull her closer. "Elena," he growled, kissed her again, and returned the favor. Her panties were torn from her, thankfully a not so favorite pair. As soon as they were gone, she pushed him to his back and straddled him. She attacked his mouth while his hands roamed her body.

Quite suddenly, unexpectedly from Stefan's point of view, Elena took him inside her in one deep, stinging plunge. Stefan gasped at the sensation, one of extreme tightness and pressure and warmth. The move hadn't given her time to adjust so it was, oh, so tight. He felt both extreme pleasure but also concern for her. She held still a moment, squeezing him even tighter, flexing her muscles more than once. "I'm fine," she said reading his mind. "I'm always ready for you, Stefan."

_God, that's hot, she's always ready for me, wet for me, hot for me…jeez… Shit, that feels good…_

She rode him good and deep with the rolling gyrations of a cowgirl on a sexy bronco ride. His hands slipped under her shirt, pushing her bra out of the way to feel her breasts and pinch the tender buds already so hard for him.

As much as he was enjoying her ride, she was enjoying it just as much if not more. She liked taking the lead and now she had the strength and stamina to really do him right. She kept her rhythm going strong, faster now than when she started. She kept rhythm as raised her shirt over her head, dropping it on the bed. She unhooked her bra letting it fall forward into Stefan's face making him smile before he bit the fabric between his teeth chuckling. He continued fondling her breasts and stroking his hands up to her face, down her neck and back to her breasts. Her hands joined his on her breasts. She stroked fingers along the backs of his hands encouraging him then slid her hands down his arms and to his chest. Her nails dug into his chest as she balanced her skilled and steady hips against him.

Two fingers pried the lace from Stefan's mouth and began to trace his mouth, those pinks lips she loved. His tongue caught her fingertips and teeth nipped to trap her inside. She smiled down at him still riding him in the most magnificent way. She allowed not one but two fingers to stay in his mouth and he sucked and toyed with them. Soon she was almost jealous of those fingers and had to have his lips on hers. She freed her fingers from his mouth, slid her hands up his arms to his wrists and removed his hands now at her waist. She pinned his arms down and dove in for his mouth.

Her hair was everywhere, covering him, as was her mouth. Her breasts tickled and pressed against his chest. She ravaged his mouth, toying with him, stopping, starting again, changing direction, and angling a new way, biting a lip, sucking it into her mouth. He tried to nip back but she would just change direction on him and again kiss him so deeply. He was lost in the blissful attack, until she lost her rhythm a little. In a flash, he'd flipped her over, pinned her wrists, and drove deeper into her in the process. She cried out from a mix of surprise and pleasure. This time he took charge of ravaging her mouth as he quickened their pace.

Initially a little disappointed that she didn't get to finish her ride, Elena was over it when Stefan leaned his hips just so and thrust at just the right angle. "Yes, yes, there, stay there...please,…, Oh Stefan,…love…you…" she panted. A smile teased at his lips upon hearing her words. He still knew her body so well, not that much had changed there. She came moments later, crying out her release. As she did, he ratcheted up his speed, really letting go for the first time with her being turned. Her eyes flew open, rolled back, and her mouth opened wider as she felt her climax extend and deepen causing her to shake and rise up off the bed into his chest. He came then, feeling her flex and squeeze around him, almost vibrating in spasm. He shuddered as his hips thrust almost involuntarily and practically pushed her further up the bed.

_MMMMMMMM ends here_

They were collapsed in a pile a limbs, completely sated, spent. "God, I love you, so much," he whispered. She voiced a happy, contented sigh. She turned to kiss his cheek next to hers. He raised his head to kiss her on the lips. She smiled at him, feeling for the first time in so long like herself, at least a bit more than she had.

"I don't suppose we could just stay in bed forever?" she asked.

"Well, I think we'd get bored eventually, if not hungry."

"Bored? Never happen," she joked, "not with you naked." She smacked his butt making a sharp stinging sound. They both chuckled at that. He separated from her and rolled to his back. They both lounged a few more minutes recovering from the happy satisfied state they'd both achieved.

"So, now what?" he asked lazily.

"What, you're bored already?" she teased.

He smiled but knew they needed to take another step, whatever that step might be in this healing process of theirs.

"I could go check on Jeremy…," he suggested.

"Without me?" she asked sounding more panicked than she intended. He rolled to his side to calm her, trailing a thumb softly down her cheek.

"What do you want to do, seriously?"

"I don't know. I know I don't ever want to be apart again," she said, reminiscent of their recent talks. "I'd be lost without you, you know that right?"

"You're stronger than you think…"

She continued "No, I know I can be again, sort of, it's just that without you, I just know that if you'd walked out on me again before the bond was broken yesterday, I don't think I'd have been able to break it even though I was told to do it. I think I would have…" He was looking at her a little oddly so she stopped. "What?"

"When did I walk out on you?"

"Well, you did break up with me. I get why you did. I was just awful," she said disgusted. "And then that night, when I came to stay. I was in the door 10 seconds and you left." She sat up to slowly start dressing and to see if her shirt had survived them laying upon it.

Stefan sat up at the foot of the bed. "And you think that was me walking out on you?" He wasn't looking at her, but his body was definitely communicating some displeasure. That night was a particularly difficult night for Stefan with a fair amount of anger directed toward Elena and Damon.

She didn't truly notice or understand yet what the stiffness in his muscles meant. She sat up next to him and answered plainly. "Well, you did." Her bra back on, she slipped her shirt over her head.

He stood up and turned around to ask flippantly, "So, what, you wanted me to stay and watch?"

"What? Of course not…"

"You're the one who basically kicked me out of my own home, Elena." He crossed to the closet to dress.

She stood up from the bed. "I did not. I was coming to the place I thought I'd be safe. I couldn't stay at my home anymore." She grabbed her jeans from the bed and brusquely starting stepping into them.

"You could have gone to Bonnie's or Caroline's," he called back a bit sarcastically.

"I guess, but I never thought we'd get so far as to not protect each other."

He emerged from the closet in jeans and slipping a shirt over his head. "We'd just broken up, Elena. You were drooling over my brother. What in hell did you expect coming to stay here?"

She stumbled trying to answer, realizing she expected too much, expected him to have been her protector again. "I, I expected you to…to not leave."

"So you could tear out my heart as I listened to you fuck Damon?"

She gasped. "Noo!"

"Then what, Elena?" he barked.

She barked back. "Maybe it wouldn't have happened!"

He just stared at her and simultaneously nodding and shaking his head, but refraining from raging at her. So she did have anger toward him after all, even if she hadn't realized it. He swallowed the bile rising in his throat. She blamed him, maybe not for all of it, but for not stopping that night from happening.

"You blame me."

She hesitated, afraid he was right. "No."

"Yes, you do."

"No," she said a shade less confidently. _Did she blame him?_ She felt the newly regained ground under her feet seem to give.

"Then what was I supposed to do, Elena? Tell me. What was I supposed to do when my newly made ex-girlfriend tells me about how strong her feelings are for my brother and then shows up for a sleep-over?"

"I didn't show up for a sleep-over…not like you mean it." He waited for her to continue, a look of not so thinly veiled disgust on his face. "I didn't. You have to understand,..." He scoffed at her telling him he had to do anything and went to a drawer for a pair of socks. "I didn't come over that night to sleep with him. But now I know you thought I did. You thought it would happen, didn't you? That's why you left, isn't it?

"Stefan, I choose to come here without even thinking of going anywhere else, because this is where I felt safest. Nothing else even entered my mind. I'm not saying that _sire-bonded _me wasn't pleased to be nearer to _him_…to Damon…" She said his name, ever so softly, closing her eyes to muster the strength. "But I did not know what was going to happen, I didn't plan it. He could have locked me in the basement cell and I would have been happy if it made him happy."

"You're in denial, Elena," he accused. He sat on a different side of the bed facing away from her with his socks in hand a pair of shoes at his feet. There was a pause as she considered this.

"Maybe. But so are you. It still wasn't really me that night Stefan. Can you at least see that? That I would never hurt you like that? Not the real me. Even if I had really wanted to move on to a new relationship, the girl you loved would not have done that to you, in front of you, like that."

Stefan thought long and hard on what she'd said. Maybe it wouldn't have happened if he'd stayed. Maybe one of them would have suggested they wait since Stefan would have heard them. Maybe one of them would have had some sense of what it would do to him…Maybe he shouldn't have left that night. But if he hadn't maybe Caroline wouldn't have figured out the sire bond that night.

"I didn't know then that you were sired. I just thought you wanted him."

"And that I'd be so heartless to rub your nose in it?"

"I didn't _know_! I didn't know _you_ anymore! _You_ weren't _you_ anymore!"

She nodded understanding, as if he could see her. "When _did_ you know? About the sire bond…How did you figure it out?

"I didn't. Caroline did."

"When?"

"I went to stay at her house. We were talking and a light just went on for her. I didn't get it until she spelled it out for me. She'd been so involved with Tyler and his sire issues that something just clicked for her. It all made sense. The blood, trusting him, but not me, killing the hunter,…" It was quiet after he trailed off.

"Why didn't you come back for me?" she asked softly.

He felt that knife, razor sharp and directly into his soul. He could have stopped them…maybe…He'd left her there. He left her at risk; left her to be violated by his own brother…He was devastated. She blamed him. Maybe she had every right to blame him.

Slowly she sat back down on the bed. They sat, facing their respective walls, each lost in their anger and guilt. Minutes past, silence deafening as both of them now sat eerily still.

"I'm sorry. Elena…I never…I never thought that night would lead to…Truly I didn't, not consciously. I just hurt so badly. I could feel what was happening, what I thought was really happening between you and Damon…But I didn't think sex…"

"I know. I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to keep it from happening. I think this is really more about anger at myself."

"All this time, I was so angry that you'd chosen him; that you left me. But I left you too…" he whispered.

"No, it's not your fault. I didn't give you much choice, Stefan. We didn't know any better at the time. I can't blame you for that. I see that now. I put you in an awful position. You were hurt. You tried to leave me with what you thought I wanted. It was the fucking sire bond, not us. I'm sorry. I don't blame you, not anymore any ways."

She got up slowly and walked over to his side and sat down, barely letting their thighs touch. They sat for a while in silence again. "Is this what you meant earlier about me directing my feelings to wherever they belonged?" Stefan gave a light snort of a laugh. She was completely on the mark except that he hadn't known he'd end up reaping some of the guilt for this along with her.

Elena gently laid her closest hand on his hands in his lap. As if she could hear his thoughts, she said, "That's enough, Stefan. No more. We've said our peace. Let's move on. No more guilt. For either one of us…Promise me…" She turned her face to his. Tearstains trailed down both their cheeks.

He felt her gaze and turned to her.

"I'll never leave you again."


	10. Chapter 10

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 10 (minimal adult content)**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – I'm have not until now not included anything after episode 409. But I'm going to borrow some plot points at this point to drive forward the story and keep me focused on the relationship development which I prefer to focus on. Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! _

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 10**_

Stefan felt better than he had in a long time. The homespun therapy sessions seemed to be helping. Elena smiled today, multiple times, genuinely smiled with each smile increasingly beginning to truly reach her eyes. He knew better than to think they were out of the woods, that they would ever be out of the woods completely, but he enjoyed a few little wins along the way, despite his guilt that lingered from earlier in the day. He was never completely able to manage his guilt away, it was always there. Especially when it came to Elena and any pain he may have been able to keep from her, it would remain with him. He swallowed it, pushed it away as always, stifling the gnawing at his soul so he could focus on recovery.

Her first real smile was when he told her a Lexi story. Elena got a real kick with how Lexi always called Stefan an idiot at the beginning of their relationship, well at the beginning of her tutelage and his recovery. It wasn't friendship until later. Lexi was coming up a lot over the last few days. She was Stefan's touchstone. She had guided Stefan through so much of his life, his re-birth into his after-life, and thus Lexi was so relevant to their present circumstances.

In sharing the "idiot" stories, Stefan was trying to boost Elena's confidence and share how his start to finding a better way to live had been less than stellar. In a way, she was re-experiencing her first days as a baby-vampire but this time without undue influence. There wasn't a clear line, none which they could agree on, when the sire bond had made her, well, not her any more. What Elena had truly experienced as the real Elena was questionable, a bit of a grey area. Therefore, they agreed they were starting from scratch, together, finding out who Elena Gilbert, Vampire, was going to be when she "grew up".

The second real smile was while they were awaiting the imminent return of Jeremy and Damon. While they waited, Stefan was trying to distract Elena from stewing about the fact that she'd be seeing Damon in the near future. He drove her to get coffee then back to the Gilbert house. He hoped the change of venue would help her cope with seeing everyone, anyone, face to face, now sire-bond free.

After she freshened up and, Stefan decided to tell Elena about a time when he'd accidentally seen Lexi naked. They'd known each other for so long, had been so close, but all platonically and never once had they seen each other naked, until "the incident".

It was almost like he forgot on some level that Lexi was a she. They were friends, best friends. She had been savior, teacher, sponsor, coach, confidante, and sister for so long, that it would have never dawned on him to even try to catch a glimpse of her in a state of undress. The incident happened after he'd been living on his own for a number of years. Occasionally they'd visit each other and catch up. On one such visit to her home, they had gone out drinking and he'd met some of her friends. She had truly built herself a nice family of good, fun people and he'd enjoyed himself immensely. Later, lying in bed, Stefan was staring at the oddities from all of Lexi's travels artistically placed around the funky guest room. He wondered if he would ever get this kind of good place in his life, as Lexi had seemed to be in at the time. He dozed off dreaming of what that life might look like if he could have it.

Stefan's musings were interrupted when he jolted awake having heard a noise from downstairs and went to investigate. He knew, thought he knew, it wouldn't be Lexi. He'd heard her get ready for bed, heard when she'd crawled into bed, and heard when she'd said "Good night, Stefan" from the room down the hall.

Now downstairs to investigate on behalf of his friend, Stefan peeked through the crack of a swinging kitchen door. He saw a completely nude and hot female body. The woman was really _gettin' some_ from a guy who had her up on a countertop. A dimmed pendant light above the woman made her torso the focus of the rather artistic display of live art in front of him. Her fair skin glowed in the soft light. The muscles of her hips and legs clenched with her movement. _Had one of Lexi's friends decided to stay over?_ He couldn't see the woman's face. He just saw a beautiful female body, full breasts and curvy hips, jiggling lasciviously as she shook from each forceful push inside her.

Stefan was almost drooling at the sight. He hadn't had a woman in a while and found he couldn't tear his eyes away from her body. The woman was leaning back on her elbows with her head tipped back into the shadows. Her legs were around the naked guy thrusting into her. Stefan remembered thinking it odd that her toenails were painted a sick orange color. What an odd thing to notice when a naked woman was on display, he shared with Elena making her laugh.

Then, like it was in slow-motion and before he could vamp-speed away, he heard Lexi's voice. "Stefan, do you mind?" The couple had stopped ever so briefly and had looked his way, stunning him like a deer in headlights. Hearing that voice, her voice, made Stefan gasp and vamp-speed up to his room.

He was completely flustered. He'd caught wood by seeing Lexi, his Lexi, naked! She was the equivalent of a sister to him. The only phrase running through his head being "Holy shit, oh shit, oh shit…" He eventually went to sleep but he was truly freaked out and embarrassed having been caught leering at his dear friend and mentor having sex. Not only that, he enjoyed the view, _sick bastard_, he thought. In hindsight, he commented that it was further evidence that he was always prone to overreacting emotionally.

They slept in late, Stefan purposefully hiding in his room, like a little chicken, Elena chimed into the story. He was delaying coming downstairs and hoping any embarrassment would have passed. Better yet, maybe more friends came over and would distract Lexi from being ticked if she was. But no such luck. The morning was awkward, but really only for Stefan. Lexi went about the morning as if nothing had happened. In Lexi's mind, she thought very little had happened. It was no big deal. The social mores of that or any decade simply didn't apply to vampires. How could they? Lexi and Stefan were ageless. But Stefan didn't know this at that time.

About mid-morning, she realized Stefan was completely tense but agreeable about what to do that day, his last full day with her. This was not the norm. She usually had to coerce him into certain activities she liked but he didn't. She also thought he was avoiding eye contact. So she confronted him. "What is wrong with you today?"

"N-Nothing, I'm fine." He didn't look at her, just kept focused on the newspaper and his coffee.

"Stefan, you can tell me. You want it, don't you?"

"Uh, what do you mean?" he asked looking up at her worriedly.

"Come on, Stefan, you can tell me. It's not like I can't tell when you need it and want it. Just be a grown up about it and tell me the truth."

"I don't. Lexi, really, I don't. I didn't know it was you."

"Wha?"

He cut her off continuing quickly to explain. "It was dark. I wasn't there long…I hardly saw anything…"

_Oh..._, she thought. She figured it out. She was talking about blood, he was not. She decided to torture him a bit. "It's ok, Stefan, you can tell me. It's what I've been hoping for…Did you like what you saw?" He nearly choked on his coffee when she unbuttoned the top button of her shirt. "Did you wish that it could be you instead?" she asked hopefully.

"No!"

"No? Why not? You didn't like what you saw?

"No! No!"

No?"

"I mean, yes, you are, very hot, I mean beautiful, I just didn't, I mean, we, I don't,…"

"Oh, Stefan," she pouted and covered her mouth to hold in a fake sob. Really turning on the dramatics, she continued. "You still don't want me? I've been waiting and waiting for the day when you'd finally want me…and there you are finally seeing me as a woman…and I thought…I hoped…" She turned away from him and sniffled as if in tears.

Stefan stood up to step closer to her. "Lexi, wait, I'm sorry, I…" he fumbled to explain. Before he could step in it any further, she turned around smiling and laughing at him as she pronounced the following.

"And the award for best actress goes to…" She laughed as she posed mocking him with a tip of the hat to herself and her acting skills. "I so had you! Get over yourself, Salvatore. Jeez, you'd think you'd never seen sex before." He fell back into the couch where he'd been sitting, even more embarrassed than he had been. She zipped to his side and plopped into kneeling on the seat next to him. She starting poking at his stomach and waist and occasionally sneaking in to squeeze his package annoyingly as Stefan, too slow in response, tried to swat her teasing hands away. "Wait, did you get a chubby? Did you? Oh my god, it's alive?! Come on now. Did little Steffie get turned on watching mommy and daddy having sex on the counter? Come on, let's see Mr. Chubby." Stefan flinched and laughed but was no match for Lexi's strength and speed from the years she had on him. They ended up out of breath and laughing, she laughing more than he. If he could have blushed, he'd have been bright red.

"Aw, don't worry about it, Sweetness. I'd be worried if you saw people having sex and didn't react. At least you know you still want it." She paused. "Seriously, when was the last time you put yourself out there?" He shrugged. It had been a long time. He didn't trust himself yet. "But you still want a woman?" He gave her a look that said, _seriously, you are asking me that? _"Come on, seriously, I have to ask. You could find yourself wanting something different. You are different now."

"Yes, I want a woman, Lexi."

"And you figured that out last night with my help, no doubt?" she teased, sneaking in one last goose to his package which he swatted away again too late.

He shot her another look. "I've always wanted women, a woman. I'd tell you if I wanted something, someone else. I'm not a prude."

"Ok, good." Switching gears, she changed subjects. "How'd my boobs look? Good? Still perky?" Lexi was looking down at her breasts and supporting them with her hands. "Again with the look…I'm seriously asking you as my friend…boobs, good or no?"

"Yes, good,…very good. Really nice in fact…"

"Don't sound so surprised…"

"Honestly, I'd never thought about them before so they were kind of a surprise."

"Well they've always been right here." She gave them an asexual squeeze. "And I know they are good. I just wanted to make you say it." She scrunched her nose at him teasingly. Then sounding truly concerned she asked, "But what about my ass?"

He pushed her off her knees and she fell back to the opposite side of the couch laughing. "Lose the fluorescent puke colored pedicure. It's gross."

"Ahh, another clue to the kind of woman you want," she said eyeing him with a wry smile. "What else?"

"I'm not saying another word. I just hope you disinfected the counter."

Elena was smiling and laughing off and on throughout the story. Stefan tried not to stare or pause for the entire story so as not to break the lovely distraction. Her beauty became stunning when she smiled at him, it took his breath away. Each time he saw it he resisted the desires to simply watch her and put a hand to her cheek. He'd continued telling the tale, animated where he needed to be, and delivering perfect punch lines. When he was through, he looked at her, and she back at him, with such love and happiness, however fleeting it might be.

She smiled back, knowing full well what he'd been up to, but enjoying it all the same. "Thank you," she said putting a palm to his cheek.

He gave that shy boy smile she loved, his equivalent to blushing. "Any time."

"So you liked towel girl's boobs then?" she teased.

"Ew. That's what you take from the story?" making a face at the thought of Lexi sexually.

"I'm just glad you didn't tell me that story any sooner."

"I never would have told you that story if she was still with us."

They quieted for a few moments, teasing seemingly done with for now.

"They are still not here," she said, worry creeping back into her face.

"We could always make out for a while," he suggested with wriggling brows. He sidled closer to her, cornering her on the sofa. She giggled at his maneuverings.

"I don't know about that…Can we just make out…? I think we are incapable of only making out."

"You may be, but I have the discipline for both of us."

"Ha," she said laughing, "As if…" still laughing as he leaned in to kiss her playfully. They kissed, keeping the mood light and happy until a low rumble of a car they both knew came to a stop out front. She stiffened in his arms and opened her eyes to see him watching her.

"It will be ok," he said. "I'm right here. Elena, just breathe." She took a big breath in as she watched him do the same. They stood up to greet presumably Jeremy and Damon.

Her brother came bounding into the house, visibly upset, and followed by Matt and Damon, less so but also upset. "Well, the shit has hit the proverbial fan, Stefan."

"What? Why?" Stefan asked, taken aback at the abrupt start to the conversation. Damon didn't even really make eye contact with Elena although she watched him a bit.

"Klaus has some very, shall we say aggressive plans to get the map..."

Jeremy interrupted. "Yeah, well you agreed with him jackass."

Damon plowed forward staring between Jeremy and Stefan. "And his insane family is wreaking havoc yet again. Kol doesn't want the cure found and is trying to get Jeremy killed or maimed."

The fight club boys proceeded to update Elena and Stefan as to Klaus' scheme to create newbie vampires in large groups for Jeremy to kill. Kol had soundly won the first round by killing all the newbies. His next plan was to cut off Jer's arm in lieu of killing him so he wouldn't be haunted by the Hunter's curse. Rebecca got her hands on the headstone of Silas. Shane was in custody for possibly mass murder.

Elena participated in the conversation now and then, even responding to Damon. She had to as it was all about protecting her brother, her number one priority once again. Damon responded indirectly, more to the group than to her directly. It would seem he had his own way of dealing with the would-be awkwardness with Elena and Stefan. Distraction and avoidance were his key methods.

It was rather anti-climactic but Elena didn't mind it actually, even though she'd been trying to think what she would say to him. Would she take the road of compassion and comfort him for what he'd been through, that her adoration of him wasn't real? Would she confront him about her concerns that he should have known better? That he should have been the one with the strength, with enough love for his brother, to abstain from bedding Elena so quickly? Should Damon have tried to get Stefan to stay at home that night, to not leave…? She really didn't know what she wanted to say to this other brother so she focused on saving hers.

They decided that the Gilberts would stay home since no Original Vampire had been invited in. Stefan tried desperately to stay, but Elena wanted to stay with Jeremy and promised they would call the cavalry if Kol showed up. Besides, Stefan should try to get the only remaining dagger they knew of from Rebecca so they could put down Kol. Damon was going to check in with Bonnie and jailed Shane about next steps in finding the cure.

Jeremy went upstairs to shower. Stefan asked Matt to help search for the dagger while he distracted Rebecca. Damon dropped Matt at home to change and get his truck. Stefan stayed behind to talk with Elena before heading out to find Rebecca.

"Are you sure you are OK on your own?"

"I won't be on my own. Jer's here." Still seeing his concern, she added, "Look, I'll be fine. Really. No I don't want you to go, but there are more important things to deal with than me being all needy." She pressed up on her toes to reach his lips and kiss him sweetly. "Thank you, for everything, for the last few days. I'd be lost without you, you know?" They kissed again.

"Love you."

"Love you." He gave her a last squeeze for strength and left to find Rebecca.

Elena looked around her family home, taking in the quiet and emptiness. Yes, Jeremy was upstairs in the shower, but even he was different now. The Hunter, her would-be killer brother, needed her protection. She couldn't lose this last remaining foothold from her human life. Sure Bonnie and Matt and others were still in her life. But family, her only family left, was Jeremy. Elena set to thinking through how she could impact protecting Jeremy and finding the cure.


	11. Chapter 11

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 11**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – But I'm continuing to borrow some plot points to drive the story forward. This is the most plot driven I've ever gotten, so it's a new experience/experiment for me – testing out new writing skills…Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! I'll get back to the Mmmm content soon enough…just needed to catch up on some "canon" bits...then the naughty bits will return both here and in "School Days". ;-)_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 11**_

Elena pondered their current predicament anxiously, waiting for Jeremy to come back downstairs. _How can they get the map without harming innocent humans? Could Bonnie do a spell to find any other hunters? Could they track and find out if that hunter's map was further along? Too dangerous_, Elena thought, leaving that idea behind. An unknown hunter could attempt to kill any number of them including Stefan or Caroline…The idea quickly moved into the "unacceptable risk" category.

What about finding an existing nest of vampires and subduing them, restraining them for Jeremy to finish off. _Kind of ruthless_, she sneered at herself. _Hunting my own kind now?_ She bet many, like her, never wanted this curse either and they just wanted to survive. She was no better than those. But what else was there? Creating new vampires in order to kill them was beyond cold.

_OK, find a nest of really evil vamps that deserve it. Sure, easy enough. No problem._ Jeremy returned at that moment and questioned the smirk on her face. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing, just solved all our problems. All we have to do is find a nest of really evil vampires that deserve to die so we can hold them down while you take them out," she offered enthusiastically but laced heavily with sarcasm, as if it would be the easiest task in the world.

"They all deserve to die," Jeremy grumbled crossing to the fridge, hungry since Damon had kept him from his favorites while at the lake. Elena gaped at him. Jeremy realized what he said and looked at Elena across the room. "I'm sorry. It's the hunter in me. I'm just on edge." Elena took a few steps toward him as if to comfort him. "No don't. Elena, I'm sorry. I just don't want to accidentally do something we'd both regret."

She stayed put. "It's ok Jeremy. I get it, at least as much as I can. That feeling of not being in control of who you are or what you do... I don't know if the sire bond is like the urges you get as a hunter, but I know it can't be easy figuring out if you are making your own decisions."

"I guess it's kind of similar. How are you doing with all that?"

"I'm…a work in progress." She sat down at the table thinking it somehow made the vampire in front of Jeremy seem less threatening to his subconscious mind. "Right after breaking the sire bond, it was like I had no confidence in any of my impulses. I'm still working on it, but I'm better than I was the first day or so. I was second guessing everything because my thoughts didn't always match my physical reactions and vice versa. You know what I mean?"

"Actually, yeah, I kinda do." They shared soft smiles as they commiserated. Jeremy ventured to step a bit closer. "Look, Elena, I really want to get this cure for you, and I really don't think you deserve to die, but I can't target innocent victims. I won't do what Klaus wants, or Damon and Stefan for that matter either."

"You won't have to. I won't let that happen. We will figure it out."

"So how are you going to find a nest of evil vampires that already exists so you can hold them down while I execute them?" he said making light fun of her earlier idea.

"Oh we will. There has to be a way. Maybe Damon knows where to look…"

"Maybe? More like probably," Jeremy snarked implying Damon of all of them probably knew where to find more nasty vamps.

"Actually, you'd think Klaus would know even more, or any of the Originals should know…right?"

"Yeah, they're all evil..," Jeremy snorted his disdain for the Originals. Elena shot him a look. "What?"

"The Originals are all evil…deserving…"

"Yeah, so…"

"When one dies, their entire line dies…Would that mean if you killed an Original, you, a hunter, would be 'responsible' for all their deaths?" Elena made little quotes in the air when she said "responsible". "Would you then maybe complete the map with one kill?"

Jeremy looked stunned at the idea. "Elena, I can't kill an Original."

"You can with a white oak stake."

"We don't have one," added Jeremy getting a little nervous that Elena was starting to like this idea for real.

"We could…"

Elena called Stefan to vet her plan. Stefan hadn't been able to find Rebecca. If she was home or close to home, she wasn't saying. He was on the phone with Rebecca trying to convince her to meet under the pretense that she should work with the gang on the search for the cure. If she didn't come around, he'd need to keep her out with him so Matt could safely search her place. Texts started to fly between Stefan and Elena.

S: Can't talk, Rebecca not cooperating yet.

E: New plan. Who has the white oak stake?

S: Kol, I think he took it from Rebecca, probably why she wants the dagger, protection.

E: Dagger not required any more. New plan. Hunter kill's Kol = map

S: = map?

E: Entire line…entire map

S: Ah, might work, might not. Big gamble, Original sib vengeance

E: Have to protect Jer from Kol anyway, might as well try, please? Get stake instead or both?

S: Will try, stand by.

Elena was more than excited by her plan by now. It was a big idea. Big problems needed big ideas. Jeremy, on the other hand was still nervous, young hunter that he was. "How many vampires do you think there are in Kol's line?" Jeremy asked.

"I don't know. He seems more likely to kill than turn people, doesn't he? But, some of the ones he turned might have turned a lot…It's really hard to predict." Elena pondered that for a moment, rethinking her idea. The thought that someone could just as easily decide to kill her line, albeit not likely with success due to Klaus being a hybrid…hhmm…

Elena's phone buzzed with another text but it wasn't Stefan, it was Damon.

D: How the hell is Jer going to get one up on Kol?

E: We all will help, hold him down, and give Jer the target.

There was a pause in Damon's response. Elena could "see" him thinking it over. It always took Damon a little while to come around to a new plan, especially when it wasn't his own. Stefan had probably texted him with brief info and told him to get on it.

D: OK, fine, I'll work it out with Jer. Be there in 5.

Elena breathed a sigh of relief. She didn't want to have to fight Damon already. She felt she could but in the moment, she wasn't sure if a million other angry thoughts might come spewing forth about the sire bond. Jeremy had to stay her number one focus for now. She told Jeremy to get ready to work with Damon…

The Gilbert doorbell rang. Elena and Jer gave each other a look. Damon, already? Not likely. "What is this, Grand Central?" Elena huffed. The pace of activity tonight was blistering as this plane heated up. Elena opened the door with Jer close behind. Before them stood Kol, the craziest of the Originals, mostly in the sense that he was the least predictable. "Hello again, Mate," he said with mock cheer to Jeremy.

"Again, not mates."

Elena was grateful for the brief exchange. The couple of seconds it took hid her shock at Kol's appearance at their front door. She reasoned she shouldn't have been surprised. Kol was on a mission to stop the Mystic Falls contingent from getting the cure and thus the map. The "fight club" left the lake and Kol had followed; no mystery there.

"What do you want, Kol?" Elena asked as if annoyed. Kol, feeling cocky as ever, spread his arms to rest on either side of the door. For just a second, Elena caught a glimpse of the indestructible white oak stake inside Kol's jacket. Kol didn't notice her gaze having looked past Elena to Jeremy.

"I want you, well, your brother there, to invite me in."

"And why would I do that when you want to rip off my arms?"

"It's really for your own good, Jeremy. You don't want to kill anymore anyway, right, darling? I'm just giving you an out from all this madness."

"By ripping off my arms…" Jer said pointedly to the obviously insane Kol.

"It's the best option. Otherwise, I may just have to compel someone else to kill you outright. Then that someone will have the hunter's curse...and yada yada yada…" Kol leered at Elena. "You remember that don't you sweetheart?" Then back to Jer but laughing eyes still on Elena, "Maybe your sister here would like to help me out." Elena sped away from the door, hopefully out of range of Kol's compulsion. Jeremy moved forward, blocking Kol's view inside. "No worries, love, I won't make you kill your brother. Although sometimes family appreciate being offered the opportunity first, you obviously do not. I'll just get another of you lot to do it…someone who has been invited in. I'll be seeing you," Kol menaced. He left rather pleased with himself, satisfied with having toyed handily with his prey.

Elena was immediately group texting to warn everyone that Kol would try to compel someone who can get in the Gilbert home to kill Jeremy. In her haste to get the word out she almost forgot she'd seen the white oak stake.

"Jeremy, Kol has the stake, on him. It was inside his jacket."

"You saw it?"

"Yes, I could have reached out and taken it but I'm sure I'd have lost an arm in the process. This means when Damon gets here, we'll be able to plan how to trap Kol, grab the stake and send him to a fiery death."

"Maybe he wanted you to see it and to go for it, so he could pull you outside and force me to let him in."

"Hhmm, I don't think so…" She replied all to her group text letting them know that Kol was in possession of the white oak stake. The team should come over to plan how to put Kol down permanently.

Damon arrived and again avoided Elena. He went straight to Jeremy. They began to choreograph a number of ways to pin down and kill Kol. Eventually, they needed someone to play Kol. No one else had arrived yet, so Elena was the only way to make three. "I can help," Elena chimed in having been on the sidelines.

Damon finally looked at her for longer than a passing glance. He lingered for a moment on her face trying not to give away how disappointed he was at losing her to Stefan. He realized he never truly had her, but the hope that had grown in his heart was again dashed. "Fine," he answered.

Jeremy was "Kol" first. This kept the hunter between them, each vampire pinning Jeremy from opposite sides. Once they had their moves down, Damon was "Kol" allowing Jeremy to practice his strike from different angles and holds. Elena holding down Damon was the first physical contact between them since the sire bond had been broken. Despite their interaction serving a greater purpose, Elena still cringed inside with each touch as she thought of how intimate they'd been, how intimate she'd been with Stefan' brother. _It was so wrong…how did we…?_ On top of that, she'd enjoyed it. It was hot. _Ick! _She tried to get it out of her mind and focus on prepping to kill Kol. She knew others would arrive soon. She could handle it for a while longer.

Rebecca finally agreed to meet and insisted on the Grill. Stefan was hoping for some place less public now that he knew Kol was searching for someone to compel. He agreed, taking what he could get. He decided to ask for the dagger before suggesting the white oak stake. Becca always seemed to know when Stefan was lying but he wouldn't be lying. He did want the dagger even if it was just the first stage of subduing Kol. Rebecca might actually be supportive of putting down Kol if she thought it would be temporary. He also knew Rebecca still had a soft spot for him based on their previous relationship, a relationship which really wasn't that long ago for her after her 90 year nap. He felt guilty about using it but he needed to get that cure and soon if there was any chance of making Elena human again. Elena had opened up to him about finding her emotion switch. He didn't want to risk anything driving her to flip off her emotions before he could get her the cure.

Stefan arrived first and secured a booth. She joined him shortly thereafter, sliding into the bench across from him. "So, what is this really about then?"

"I need the dagger."

"Well that's more direct than usual. Why?"

"Kol. Best case, he' going to rip off Jeremy's arms. Worst case, he's going to compel someone to kill him."

"And then poor Elena would be lost, devastated at the loss of her brother. You are still her knight in shining armor aren't you?"

Stefan didn't take the bait. He didn't know who else knew that he and Elena were back together and that the sire bond had been broken and he didn't want to get into it now with his exe. "We need the map, Rebecca, to get the cure."

"Yes, there is that."

"You still want it don't you? We just need to stop him, temporarily."

She smirked at him. Just then, Stefan saw Kol enter the Grill. "Shit, your brother," he mouthed trying to buy time before Kol found him.

Rebecca touched Stefan's hand drawing his attention back to her before Kol got too close. She agreed to give Stefan the dagger under one condition. Her voice drew Kol over too soon. He slid into the booth next to Rebecca. 'Hello, sister, I hope I'm not interrupting."

"Yes you do."

"I know but I was trying to be pleasant about it. Is this a date? Still trying to bag a Salvatore, sister?"

"Shut up, Kol. What do you want?"

"I need to borrow your date."

"I don't think he'd be interested in you."

"But I am in him. Stefan, I need you to do me a favor." Kol began to compel Stefan. "First, I'd like you to break your fingers without feeling any pain."

"Kol, what are you doing? He's going to need his hands for what I have planned tonight. Knock it off."

Stefan looked at Kol and Rebecca with a dazed look of the compelled and started breaking the fingers of his left hand without flinching. "And the thumb too please, darling." When Stefan looked at his right hand wondering how to now break those fingers since his left hand was out of commission, Kol chimed back in. "That's alright, one hand is good. Now put your broken hand flat on the table." Kol then smashed his fist down onto the mangled hand. Stefan cried out drawing some attention. "I told you not to feel pain, Stefan."

"You said not to feel pain when _he_ broke them, not when you did it for him," Rebecca admonished.

"True. No more pain, Stefan, you are fine." Stefan visibly relaxed looking back and forth between the two Originals. "Go ahead, straighten out those breaks so they heal right." Stefan set his bones and looked up at Kol as if for approval. "Very good, darling, now, I need you to kill Jeremy Gilbert. He won't suspect you because you will use stealth to get to him amongst your friends. They will think you are still on their side so you will be able to get close enough to take him out without much difficulty. Oh, and I'd like it to be tonight, sorry Becca, but you understand. Have you got that? You won't remember this conversation or seeing me here tonight."

"I'm going to kill Jeremy Gilbert tonight. He will trust me to get close enough so I can easily take him out."

"Very good. So Becca, would you like to watch the show? It should be quite entertaining."

"No thanks, you've already ruined my night."

"Don't be sad, Rebecca, be a good girl won't you? We all will be much better off without Silas and you, dear sister, will remain with your family as you should." Kol stood from the table and gave his last goodbyes. "See you ring-side. Better get a move on there, Stefan. Only a few hours left to get the job done." He was gone.

Stefan turned back to Rebecca. "I have to leave," Stefan said quietly. He looked at Rebecca, not happy to be leaving without finishing his conversation with Rebecca but he knew he had to leave right away.

"Yes, yes, leave," she said drearily. He was up and out of his seat hurriedly. She left as well and began to text him as soon as she was outside. "I'll get it. See you soon, lover." Stefan just rolled his eyes at her flirtatious text then deleted it, but was happy to know she would give him the dagger. Another text came in. "Kol's watching you from across the street." Stefan hurried to the Gilbert home heeding the warning. Kol was too dangerous to run into without help.

_(don't forget two new chapters tonight so #12 is posted too!)_


	12. Chapter 12

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 12**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – But I'm continuing to borrow some plot points to drive the story forward. This is the most plot driven I've ever gotten, so it's a new experience/experiment for me – testing out new writing skills…Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! I'll get back to the Mmmm content soon enough…just needed to catch up on some "canon" bits...then the naughty bits will return both here and in "School Days". ;-)_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 12**_

Stefan made his way quickly to the Gilbert home. He needed to catch up on Elena's progress with Jeremy and Damon. Entering the front door, he saw the entire contingent ready for action: Caroline, Tyler, Bonnie, Damon, and Elena, but no Jeremy. Where was the star of the show? Elena went to meet him in the foyer. "Where've you been so long?" It wasn't an accusation. She sounded genuinely anxious at having been apart so long.

"It's ok, I'm right here," he whispered quietly in her ear as they hugged hello before she brought him in to the others. Damon had averted his eyes from their hello. He got up to refill his drink.

"Where've you been, brother?"

"Convincing Rebecca to give us the dagger," Stefan answered entering the family room.

"But we don't need the dagger any more. We are going to stake him," Caroline added confused.

"And what if Kol shows up without the stake in his jacket?" Stefan asked.

"Good point," Caroline answered.

"Did you see Kol, Stefan?" Elena asked.

"No, just Rebecca."

"What was my last text to you?"

"You warned me that Kol wanted to compel someone to kill Jeremy and that Kol has the stake. Is that what this is about?" he asked questioningly looking at everyone.

"We just want to make sure he didn't get to anyone," Elena answered.

"He didn't get to me," Damon said. "I drank some of the town's lovely water, watered down with bourbon of course." He made the ice in his glass clink loudly. "I was with the Sheriff and came straight here."

Caroline responded next. "That was a good idea, why didn't we all do that to get back on vervain? Tyler and I were together…and," Caroline blushed when Tyler smiled at her. Ok, now everyone knew what they were doing before. "We came right over. We didn't see anyone else."

"So I'm the missing link? I didn't see him, guys. But I appreciate the due diligence. That said, it could be a human that gets compelled, you know." Stefan looked around the room.

"Don't look at me," Bonnie said. "You know witches can't be compelled."

"I was thinking more along the lines of the Sheriff or a deputy…someone with a weapon," Stefan added.

"Then we should get this done sooner than later. The sooner Kol's out of the picture the sooner anyone compelled will be freed," Elena suggested with urgency.

They all agreed. They also agreed they needed to watch what they talked about since Kol had already stopped by once earlier that day. He could easily hear them and foil the whole plan if he cared to spy on them. That said, the stereo was on in one room and the TV was on in another to obscure their conversation from eavesdroppers. They finished prepping their plan and getting Stefan up to speed.

"Where's Jeremy?" Stefan asked hopeful he'd finally make an appearance.

Bonnie answered. "Where none of you have been invited in. He'll come when it's time. Elena, make the call."

Elena took a calming breath and used Jeremy's phone to call Kol, hopeful that the number on speed dial was still current. "Jeremy Gilbert, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"It's Elena Gilbert actually. I want to talk."

"And just what do we need to talk about, my little hybrid catalyst?"

"I want to make a deal to save my brother. Name the time and place."

"Well now, I tried to get a little hospitality from you earlier, but neither you nor young Jeremy was very welcoming. Shall we try that again?" The doorbell rang. Elena opened the door and hung up the phone.

"He's not here, so he can't invite you in."

"Pity, what do you suggest?"

"We'll talk. Here."

"With you safely inside, that's a bit impolite, don't you think?"

"I'll come out."

"That's very brave of you."

"I'm not coming out alone. Stefan and Damon are here."

"Of course they are…Ah, the ever-present allure of the Petrova Doppelganger. I never met a Salvatore who could resist." Stefan came forward into the foyer looking ever the protector. "Ah, back to this brother now are we? One can't help but wonder for how long…" Kol said with only him understanding the double entendre. He knew when Jeremy arrived that Stefan would kill him without really consciously knowing why. Elena would break at the loss and the devastation of one of her lovers killing her brother. Kol stepped aside with a grand gesture like he was their host letting them into his domain. Elena and Stefan joined Kol on the porch.

"The sire bond has been broken. I'm back to being me, well as close as I can be while not being human anymore." Elena took Stefan's hand. They shared a glance ending when Stefan encouraged her to continue. "We've decided we don't want the cure anymore. I don't want it anymore."

"Isn't true love grand," Kol mocked. "I don't believe you. And even if you don't, Klaus does. He will jam it down your throat to get more hybrids."

"Kol, I don't care what you believe, but I'm not, we are not looking for the cure anymore. I'm getting accustomed to life, to being this way. I'm meant to be with Stefan and now I will be forever. Bonnie can do a spell, she's been researching, and she says she can get Jeremy to completely stop hunting. Please Kol, let us do this for my brother…"

Bonnie slipped out the front door, sidled past Kol to stand at Stefan's side. "It's true, Kol. I know how to stop a hunter without killing him."

"Well this is interesting." Rebecca had joined the party. "So Teams Gilbert and Salvatore are no longer looking for the cure." She joined them on the porch and stood next to Kol. Putting her hands on her waist, she let her jacket fall open revealing the handle of the dagger for all to see except Kol. She took a couple steps closer to sneer at them. "Was any of it ever real? Were we ever a team working together? It's just one betrayal after another with you people. And you, _I can't be a vampire, Stefan_," she whined as if in imitation of Elena. "Now you are suddenly ok with it? You fickle, two timing slut."

Together Stefan and Rebecca had distracted Kol from their real motives as Rebecca ranted and pushed at Elena's chest. Stefan made it look like he was protecting Elena when he pushed back on Rebecca. It was all a ruse to allow Stefan to take the dagger and hide it behind his back.

"That's enough Rebecca!" Kol shouted but smiled at his sister's dig at Elena. Rebecca was taking advantage of the situation to let out some probably very real sentiments about Elena so it wasn't a stretch for Kol to believe her little tirade. Rebecca gave a smile and wink to Stefan and Elena before turning around to confront Kol.

"Really, Kol, you can't imagine why I'd be disappointed about not finding a cure that I learned about hundreds of years ago? That I wanted hundreds of years ago…?"

"Becca, darling…"

"Don't darling me…" At that very moment, Bonnie gave a scream and Rebecca gave a last gasp of the dying. Stefan had put the dagger in Bonnie's hand, tore her sleeve to wind it around her hand enclosed around the dagger, and pushed her hand up into Rebecca's heart from the back.

"Sorry, Bonnie," Stefan let out under his breath.

"What did you do?" Kol screamed in shock as Rebecca fell daggered into his arms.

"She wanted the cure. She brought us the dagger to use on you."

Kol seemed rather speechless as he held his sister's lifeless body. Of course it was temporary but it didn't mean he liked the situation. It took a moment for Kol to understand what Stefan had just told him. He was still distressed at this turn of events but finally he said, "I guess I should say thank you."

Elena had her arms around Bonnie who was still in shock with her part in the killing, temporarily, of Rebecca. This was not part of the plan, but it seemed to be working in their favor. They could see it on Kol's face. He was starting to believe what they'd said was true. Finally, indicating how he was holding up the body of his sister, Kol said to Stefan, "Do you mind not leaving my dead sister out on the front porch like sack of potatoes?"

"Sure, sorry." Stefan looked at Elena who nodded yes to his silent question. He took her from Kol and brought her inside to lay her on her side on the sofa in the living room. Stefan sped back to Elena's side, not wanting to leave her nor Bonnie alone with Kol.

"So, now what?" Kol asked.

"Now we figure out how to stop Klaus from searching for the cure. Are you in?"

Kol nodded slowly, still hesitant to completely trust anyone.

Jeremy's voice came from the open foyer. "Elena?" Stefan stiffened noticeably, at least to Kol, and looked like he was getting ready to make a move.

"It's ok, Jer, you can invite him in now." Kol looked at Elena rather impressed and got just a little bit more comfortable with this turn of events. Or, maybe he was pleased because the show might really be getting started now that Jeremy had arrived. She walked to the door followed by Kol, Stefan right behind, and then Bonnie. Elena stepped just inside the doorframe awaiting Jeremy's invite. "Really Jer, it's ok," Elena coaxed gently again.

Jeremy hesitated, not looking at all pleased to invite Kol inside and offered a sneer instead. Kol took the bait leering in closer to Jeremy. Elena took a step further into the house as a natural response to counter Kol's move into her personal space. Kol put his arms up on the door frame as he had earlier. "Grow a pair, mate. Even your sister has bigger ones than you."

Elena gave the sign. She could see the stake still tucked inside Kol's jacket. Suddenly, Damon, Stefan, Caroline, and Tyler each had a hold on Kol. Elena ripped the stake free of Kol's jacket and Jeremy moved in to take the stake from her and strike. Bonnie was using some kind of spell to help keep Kol pressed up against the invisible barrier that kept unwelcome vampires from entering the Gilbert home. The stake struck at Kol's heart just as Kol's eyes found Stefan's. He choked out a couple of words before screaming in agony. "But you were…"

Stefan said, "Sorry." The fiery death overcame Kol moments later. Upon his death the barrier was broken and his burning corpse fell into the foyer. The action startled the team as they nearly fell in on top of the blaze.

From the front yard, they all heard a menacing voice. "What's going on?" It was Klaus. The group on the porch stiffened then quickly sped inside jumping over and past the burning corpse.

"Quick, pull him inside!" Elena exclaimed not a moment too soon. In the commotion and confusion, and as burnt hands healed from handling the body, the group realized they'd just kept the white oak stake out of Klaus' possession.

Klaus was at the door, eerily reminiscent of Kol's previous stance, hands on the door frame and screaming to be let inside. Klaus was furious. His brother, as much as he hated him at times, didn't deserve to be killed by this ragtag bunch of impure, diluted vampires.

"Let him in," Bonnie said. When everyone stopped and looked at her like she was crazy, she again said commandingly, "Move to the kitchen and let him in." Everyone except Bonnie moved to the kitchen. Jeremy gave the invite.

"Witch, you can't hurt me. You aren't strong enough." Klaus stepped inside and vamp-sped past Bonnie and toward the group in the kitchen ready to rip out someone's throat. He found himself stopped by an invisible barrier trapping him in the Gilbert family room. He roared and struck at the invisible walls, screaming how he was going to kill them all and destroy the cure. Bonnie made some motion with her hand nearest Klaus. For a few seconds, he could not speak. It startled Klaus to be toyed with thusly. Bonnie motioned for the others to join her outside. They moved far enough away so as not to be overheard. But they could still hear Klaus who was once again screaming to be let out.

Finally, Tyler broke the silence. "Holy shit." The group all chuckled and collectively breathed a sigh of relief. "Bonnie, how did you do that?" Tyler asked.

"It's just like any barrier spell except that it's focused on a room. It will last as long as the moon is in its current phase, three maybe four days. But I can only get him to shut up for short bits. It's like I temporarily steal his words," Bonnie explained. "What I need to know is why I had to dagger Rebecca?" She looked pointedly at Stefan.

"Yeah, sorry I couldn't say anything earlier. Kol found me at the Grill with Rebecca." The group gasped. "Before he could compel me, Rebecca beat him to it. She compelled me to not succumb to any compulsion but hers and thankfully that I should feel no pain."

"Why?" Damon asked.

"Because she's known her family for 1000 years and must have realized how Kol would test if he was able to compel me. He told me to break my fingers without feeling it. So I broke them but didn't feel pain as Rebecca had taken that away. Thankfully, she kicked me under the table so that I would pretend to be in pain when Kol smashed my hand himself. She's pretty quick, that one."

"Then why did you make me dagger her?" Bonnie asked. "She was helping us."

"To break her compulsion," Elena deduced.

"Yes, but the main reason is I didn't trust Rebecca to not interfere with staking Kol. We didn't count on her showing up with the dagger in the middle of facing Kol. Did anyone else flashback to Elijah when he double-crossed us at the sacrifice? Besides, in the moment I could see Kol hadn't come around to us yet. Daggering her, in effect protecting Kol from being daggered, made him believe we were telling him the truth. Whether or not that would have made him try to reverse his attempted compulsion for me to kill Jeremy, we'll never know."

"I doubt it. He was all smiles when he heard Jeremy show up. Why didn't you tell us you were faking the compulsion?" Damon asked a little perturbed.

"Becca texted that Kol was following me. I had to play along in case he heard anything. Thankfully, someone was two steps ahead and had the stereo and TV going when I walked in…"

"That'd be me," Caroline chimed in. "At the time, to be honest, I had no idea why I thought of that. But I'm wondering if it was because my subconscious mind knew I was supposed to take over if Stefan failed to kill Jeremy." They all looked at her surprised, all except Tyler who suddenly remembered Kol interrupting him and Carolyn earlier but little else. He gasped as it came back to him. Caroline answered his confusion. "He compelled you to go to sleep."

"Man, no wonder where Katherine learned to have plan b, plan c, plan z…" Damon commented sharing a glance to Stefan and Elena. "Frickin' Originals…"

"Do you all realize there are three of them in our house right now?" Jeremy asked with heavy irony. "Granted one is dead. Another is temporarily dead. The last is, well, an asswipe." The group collectively smirked.

"Yes, now what do we do?" Elena asked the group.

Bonnie answered. "We wait for the map."

"I have to un-dagger Rebecca," Stefan said quietly.

"What? Why?" Damon howled.

"She has the headstone. We need it. She wants the cure too. She's on our side, Damon," Stefan answered.

"You are out of your mind if you think she still will be after tonight!"

"Bonnie, can you do another spell to hold Rebecca while we explain?" Stefan asked.

"I guess so, yes, I could keep her in the living room. But I don't know what will happen when the spell is dropped. She's not been invited in."

"I do. At least I know what happened when I woke Elijah. He couldn't breathe or control his movement very well. He had to get out and fast."

"Ok," Bonnie said, "So yes I could trap her. It would be like a bubble within a bubble…but then she'll have to leave when I drop the spell. Regardless, that doesn't mean we _should_ un-dagger her." It was quiet for a moment as they all considered their next steps.

"Stefan's right." It was Jeremy who spoke. In a way, he had the most to lose. Hopefully he was only temporarily spelled and could go back to a human life sometime soon. He was the easiest target although getting stronger. Even he thought Rebecca might be of some use. "She wants the cure. She's stronger than all of us. We could use the help of an Original against Silas. I don't trust them, but if I had to bet on one helping, I'd take Rebecca over Klaus any day. Worst case, we take her out too." Jeremy held up the indestructible white oak stake. His confidence had definitely grown now that he'd taken out Kol, with help of course. "That said, while she's still daggered, let's see if we get the whole map or not. If we need another Original to get the complete map, we have her." He'd spoken so calmly, rationally.

They all looked at Jeremy with a mix of pride and concern, not to mention the anticipation of Jeremy telling them if more of the map appeared. He was the younger tag-along brother growing up before their eyes. But it was a little scary too, seeing this previously quiet soul suggesting a plan and how easy he could flip between allowing Rebecca to live or to kill her. The stronger Jeremy got, the more at risk any vampire, including his friends, would be.

Caroline chimed in with her support, but added, "I'm ok with Rebecca helping but I want us all back on vervain before we wake her."

"Good point, Car," Tyler added sliding his arm around her waist in solidarity.

Elena summed up for everyone. "We're agreed then? We all get vervain, we wait for the map, if it doesn't work or if we get the whole map, we wake Rebecca. But if we only get some of the map, we stake Rebecca." Her eyes landed on Stefan for that last bit. His compassion and past history with Rebecca would make this harder on him than others. While she loved this about him, she internally chastised her twinge of jealousy. She held Stefan's gaze until he nodded yes. The others all concurred, even Damon.

Heading back to the Gilbert house for vervain-laced bourbon for all the vamps, Jeremy suddenly stopped. Tyler and Caroline had been behind him as they walked. Tyler ran into Jeremy lightly, stopping just a second too late. "Dude?" he said wondering why Jeremy had just stopped cold. Jeremy seemed confused. Where Tyler touched his back to keep from falling over, Jeremy felt hot. Caroline was just in front of Jeremy since she hadn't been slowed by the sudden stopping of anyone in front of her.

"Jeremy? Are you ok?" She reached out for his arm and too felt how hot Jeremy was to the touch.

"Fire, fire, I'm burning…Aaaaagghhhhh!" he screamed and tore his shirt off overhead like it was on fire. But it was his own flesh he wanted to tear off. Suddenly he stopped screaming. The pain was gone and ink began to appear as if someone invisible was drawing on him. By now, the rest of the group had come back to circle around Jeremy and help. Quickly everyone realized it was the tattoo being written broadly across Jeremy. It seemed he was getting the complete map all at once which initially caused pain but now they all just watched amazed.

Jeremy heard the gasps and comments of the group. "You can see it too?" They all nodded.

Elena came forward, concern and fear for her brother etched into her face. She gently touched his arm. "Are you ok?" He nodded. He glanced at Bonnie, to ground his feelings, since Elena was so near. Bonnie came forward to help him focus just in case the appearance of the complete map made it harder for him to control his hunter instincts surrounded as he was by vampires. Jeremy seemed fine, good in fact.

Bonnie took his arm and said, "Come on, let's get you inside but put on your shirt. Neither the neighbors nor the Originals need to see this right now." Caroline handed Jeremy his shirt and they led him back in the house. Everyone followed, anxious to get vervain and decode the map.

Stefan lingered just outside the door. Elena noticed and held back. "You ok?"

"Relieved."

"Yes, we got the map." She watched his sad nod of agreement. "And…we don't have to stake Rebecca, which is really what you are relieved about…" she added realizing the real meaning behind the relief.

"Sorry. But I am glad for both."

"Don't apologize. I love you and your compassion for others."

"Even for her?"

"I'll always have a little green monster when it comes to her, but that's my problem, not yours."

Stefan softly smiled at her and touched her cheek. "You have nothing to worry about."

"Sure I do, she compelled you. She wants you. What if she solves that problem some day with compulsion?"

"She won't. She wouldn't want it that way. I know her."

"Don't remind me…" Elena said inferring the other way he knew the Original sister.

"I didn't mean it like that," he said pulling her into his arms.

"I know…it was the little green monster who said it," she said sheepishly into his chest. He chuckled at her and held her tight. "I miss you, being alone, just you and me, like the last few days." He held her tighter for just a bit longer. Both of them were wondering when they'd get to be alone again without a major strategy taking them away from coupling.

Soon they joined the others who were already drinking in the kitchen trying to ignore Klaus. Jeremy begged Bonnie to steal Klaus' words again. He thought that was awesome. The team poured drinks for a toast to the reunited couple but stopped short when they realized they didn't want to piss off Damon. Elena got a few private winks toasting her homecoming from the land of the sired. Caroline even got an arm around both Stefan and Elena at different times and squeezed her silent Team Stefan cheer to both of them.

After a couple of cough-inducing rounds of vervain-laced shots, the group could finally look in Klaus' direction if they so desired. None did. They decided it was time to wake Rebecca. Bonnie and Stefan shared a look. He followed her to the living room. Bonnie got situated and was going to start the spell. Stefan came closer. Bonnie stopped her internal prep but didn't open her eyes. "Move away Stefan. I just need Rebecca."

"I want you to trap me too," Stefan said quietly.

"What?!"

Elena and Caroline came flying around the corner echoing Bonnie's question. "Are you crazy?" Caroline wailed. Elena simply sped between Stefan and Bonnie as if blocking the spell from Stefan.

"What are you doing?" Elena said fiercely yet quietly. She looked so angry, she was so angry. "It's one thing to be compassionate, Stefan…but this…Rebecca could wake in a fit of rage and take you out."

"She won't. Elena, it will help her to trust us if I'm trapped as well. She'll know we trust her to work with us soon as she gets past Kol being gone."

Klaus laughed from the other room. "You overestimate my sister yet again, dear Stefan."

"Shut up, Klaus," Stefan hissed quietly. "Elena, don't listen to him. I know what I'm doing, please trust me." Elena gave him that look, the look that said I know what you are doing. He was reminding her of the lack of trust she had in him as the sire bond took hold. "Don't guilt me into this, Stefan. You know I trust you but I can disagree with you."

"I know, I'm sorry, but I really need to do this," Stefan said taking her face between his palms. "Please understand."

"It'll be ok, Elena," Bonnie chimed in. "I can help if needed." She gave an encouraging nod to Elena and Caroline. In the kitchen, Damon just rolled his eyes and Tyler chuckled as they took another shot and took turns flipping off Klaus.

Bonnie worked the spell and pulled the dagger from Rebecca. She joined the other girls and backed away to watch from the hall. Stefan sat next to Rebecca, took her hand, and waited. It didn't take long for the Original to stir having been daggered so recently. She gasped awake in a panic. "What happened? Was I daggered? Why?" She sat up facing Stefan and didn't see the others. She noticed Stefan holding her hand. While she liked that, it was certainly concerning.

"I'm sorry, Rebecca."

"For what? You didn't dagger me. You can't use the dagger without dying, Stefan. Did Kol do it? Where is the bastard?"

"Rebecca, Kol didn't believe that we were going to stop searching for the cure. We needed to get him to trust us. So, I earned his trust by daggering you and telling him we were supposed to dagger him. I made someone wield the dagger for me."

Rebecca pulled her hand away from Stefan violently. She whisked away from him so fast that he slipped down to his knees and off the sofa before he could try to catch up to her. Rebecca ran into the invisible barrier. Just beyond the barrier stood the girls, anxiously watching. All three of them jumped a bit at Rebecca's approach despite knowing she could not escape. "What is this? What have you done, witch? Dagger me then trap me…What is going on, someone tell me right now!"

Klaus chimed in. "Welcome to my world, Rebecca. They've trapped me, now you, and they've killed Kol. I presume you are next."

"No you aren't. Klaus, shut up," Stefan jibed right back. "Becca listen to me, plea…" Before he could finish, Rebecca had spun around and wrapped her hand around his throat crushing his windpipe as she choked him.

"Stefan!" Elena cried out.

"Rebecca, stop or I'll drop this barrier spell. Remember, you have not been invited into this home." Bonnie spoke quickly. Rebecca must have understood what would happen if she was suddenly subjected to the pain of not having been invited in. She relaxed her hold on Stefan's throat and pushed him down to the floor. She also realized she could continue to leverage access to Stefan if she needed so she decided to behave as requested for now. Staring down at Stefan, she waited expectantly for his explanation. After gasping a bit and trying to swallow, he started to explain again.

"We had to do it. We'd already used the dagger on you. Kol was acting like he was coming around but he didn't try to undo his attempted compulsion on me, or the real compulsion of Caroline and Tyler. He'd gotten to them before me. They'd have killed Jeremy. We took him down with the only weapon we had left. We got the stake and finished what we'd started."

Klaus chimed in again. "Oh, come on, tell her the real reason. You knew damned well that you were going to stake our brother. You wanted to get the map and you got it when Kol's entire line was sacrificed."

Stefan fessed up. "We knew it would be an option, yes. He wouldn't stop going for Jeremy. None of us would have gotten the map or the cure, ever, not even you." By now he was standing face to face with Rebecca hoping she'd see reason beyond any anguish over the loss of a brother. It all hinged on how badly she wanted that cure. Stefan believed she wanted it desperately and was gambling with lives, primarily his, that he was right.

"There was probably another way you know, without killing him. I know he was a crazy bastard but he was still my brother."

"I get it. Believe me, I do. I really am sorry."

Rebecca stared at him, pondering next steps. "So, let's see this map…," Rebecca announced as if she was moving on. No one moved. "Come on, chop-chop. I'm the one trapped." Stefan gave a nod to the girls to go ahead. He was fine staying in the trap for now. Elena called to Jeremy to come forward. He came to stand just outside the barrier. "I don't have X-ray vision, Hunter," she snarled.

"Why are we showing it to her anyway? You can't decode it, can you?"

"Can you?" she asked sardonically, turning her look to Stefan behind her. "Trust works both ways you know."

Stefan looked back to Jeremy, pleading mildly for Jeremy to understand. Bonnie came to Jeremy's side touching his arm. "It's ok Jeremy. She's on our side." Everyone knew he'd concede but he made a show of begrudgingly removing his shirt. Rebecca studied the markings but said little.

"We are going to need the sword to sort this out," Stefan said softly behind her.

Rebecca kept studying the markings but answered knowingly. She'd been waiting for this next topic. "True. It's only too bad I wasn't the one you chose to trust in obtaining the sword or we'd have it now." Stefan smirked knowing he deserved that dig, but it made more sense to the others why Stefan felt he'd needed to be trapped with Rebecca. He'd betrayed her and needed to make it up to her.

Klaus was sitting, looking like the cat that ate the canary. His arms were behind him, fingers laced, supporting his head as he cockily watched for anyone to step his way. He couldn't wait for someone to ask him for the sword. He had leverage once again.

_(So, how'd I do on more plot/action writing with my alternate way of moving through season 4? Maybe a more believable way to get Jeremy to kill an original…?)_


	13. Chapter 13

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 14**_

_A/N - As usual, I only own the story, my ideas, but the characters and TVD belong to others – But I'm borrowing some plot points to drive the story forward…Thank you so much for all the feedback and reviews! I really appreciate it! MMMM section annotated per usual…_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 14**_

Klaus wouldn't talk. He had no plans to divulge the hiding place of the sword. He only hoped the _Scooby gang_ didn't get any smarter than they had already. He just had to wait out this spell. The witch couldn't keep him in the Gilbert family room forever. At least that's what he chose to believe. They would cave, negotiate, they'd need him for something…Or Rebekah would help him eventually,…certainly he still meant more to her than this lot…didn't he?

His face would never give any hint of this conversation in his head. Klaus was very careful about his ever-present mask of bravado, only removing it if it suited his motives. His thoughts turned to Caroline. He believed, despite her protests, that there was something there, something that Caroline could not admit but that she was drawn to him. She'd likely never act on it, not without a compelling event, no pun intended. He would continue to work her in the hope that someday she just might show a crack in her refusal to consider him. Someday…

The front door brought him out of his daydream of what someday might be like, a loving Caroline, in his bed, on the floor, even better in the shower... Damon sauntered in, a cocky grin across his mug and headed straight to the kitchen for a shot. Elena entered slowly, slipping casually out of her jacket and resting it on the banister. Stefan followed looking ever so relaxed, stopped next to Elena, and leaned and elbow on top of Elena's jacket. Then…he held up his left hand and someone tossed him the sword…._Ta daa_…He smiled at Klaus, flicking the weapon up and toward Klaus' direction. Rebekah was standing outside the front door having set up this little scene just to rub it in Klaus' face, even though she couldn't really see Klaus...

It was less than two hours ago that the team had decided they knew the top places to search for the sword. Rebekah used her knowledge as leverage to be trusted and set free of the living room trap. In trade, she would take the Salvatores to what she suspected were the most likely hiding places of the sword. Elena joined them because she didn't like Rebekah getting any closer to Stefan than she already was. As it was, Stefan had already told Rebekah that he'd get her out the door the second the spell was lifted so that she wouldn't have to endure the pain of not having been invited in the Gilbert home.

When the time came, Bonnie told them she was ready. Rebekah and Stefan made their way to the closest edge of the trap. Then, much to Elena's chagrin, Stefan bent slightly and hoisted Rebekah over his shoulder, ready to run out the front door. "Nice view, Salvatore," Rebekah teased for Elena's benefit, no doubt. "Wouldn't it be a lot easier if you just had the hunter invite me in?"

Stefan grimaced while catching Elena's eye, neither enjoying Rebekah's flirtatious teasing. "We don't know if that would work, Rebekah, since you are already inside. Besides, Jeremy is not here at the moment."

"You need to keep better tabs on him. Fine, let's go." Stefan squeezed her thighs tighter to him so if she started to flail uncontrollably, he would hopefully not lose his grip on her. It was a short little jaunt but he had to get her around the front door and quickly and without damage to her or the house. Bonnie nodded at Stefan, closed her eyes, and in just a second or two, Rebekah's body began to stiffen awkwardly. Stefan charged out the front door as fast as possible but not before Rebekah had to experience just a hint the agony of being inside without an invitation.

Stefan set her down gently, more gently than an Original really needed. He held on to her sides to ensure she was stable. That was Stefan, always the gentleman with the ladies. Rebecca stood, looked slightly disoriented, swallowed and said quietly, "That was really strange. Thank you." Stefan just gave her a nod and let go since she was seemingly settled on her own two feet. Elena had watch the whole exchange, half taking it in, and half monitoring her heightened emotions. Vampire heightened jealousy could be a very dangerous thing she reasoned with the rational part of her mind.

When the four, Elena, Stefan, Damon, and Rebekah, had left the Gilbert home, Klaus had been cocky and snarling, admonishing them for even trying to go against him. Now, with the sword in their hands, Klaus sat looking moderately angry and disappointed that his efforts had been undone so swiftly.

From outside the front door, they all heard Rebekah clear her throat. "We didn't think you would be back so soon. Jeremy is out getting something to eat." It was Caroline coming around the corner from the kitchen. She and Tyler were keeping watch at the Gilbert's while Bonnie and Jeremy were out.

Sighing, Rebekah said, "Fine. I'll go break Shane out and start on the travel plans."

"And we'll work on the tattoo once Jeremy comes back." Stefan gave Rebekah a smile and a nod goodbye, closing the door as she left.

"That was convenient," Stefan said with a grimace.

"We don't need another one invited in even if we are partners in this," Caroline answered returning to the kitchen with Stefan and Elena.

They studied the sword and when Jeremy arrived they compared symbols from the sword to the tattoo. It was making very little sense. Klaus snickered at their efforts. Caroline ventured closer. "You know, even you still want the cure found. We only trapped you here because of you wanting revenge over Kol."

"You don't say," he said facetiously coming forward as he mocked her.

"The point, Klaus, is that if you want the cure found, you could at least help us, maybe show us you are ready to play nice in this," Caroline pleaded.

"My brother was murdered by you lot within hours of this conversation and you want my help."

"Klaus," Elena chimed in, getting angrier with every word, and looking like she would charge Klaus at any second. "You know darn well we couldn't let him alone. He was going to kill Jeremy and there would go the map…"

Stefan joined in putting a hand on Elena's shoulder to help calm her down. "And another hunter would have been triggered that we wouldn't have line of sight to…"

"And stop being such a dick…You hated Kol," Damon tagged in last. The others gave him a "you are not helping" look.

Caroline came closer again and tried more softly. "Klaus, show us, show me you can be trusted."

Tyler was not comfortable and called to her. "Caroline, you are too close. Step back." But it was too late. Klaus used the closest thing in his reach to pull Caroline into his trap. She was only slightly hurt but he held her so tight it caused more discomfort. Her back was against his chest in his favorite biting and feeding position, his mouth poised to bite her neck. He'd have much preferred to do something else to her in this position, but he was getting desperate to be set free.

Tyler and Stefan were at the ready just outside the trap and everyone voiced their outrage. "Let her go, Klaus!" "Don't hurt her!" At that moment, Bonnie and Jeremy walked in the front door.

"What's going on?" Bonnie asked eyeing Klaus angrily.

"Witch, you will get me out of here, now!"

"No," Bonnie sneered back.

"You will or I'll bite lovely Caroline leaving her to die without my blood to cure her. It's a miserable way to die, remember darling?" He said it into Caroline's ear but his eyes were on Damon and Elena as they both remembered the agony of being poisoned by wolf venom, as did Caroline.

"No," Bonnie said again, steel in her veins. Bonnie closed her eyes and began working her magic. Jeremy had an evil smile on his face as he stayed at Bonnie's side to watch. The lighting flickered as she held up her hand and suddenly the indestructible white oak stake flew from its hiding place to her hand. Not just Klaus, everyone present was a bit more worried at what Bonnie was intending. But Damon seemed a little calmer.

Elena was about to run for Bonnie but Damon grabbed her and held her back. "Bonnie, no! You'll kill us all! Damon, let me go!" He held her tight against him as if protecting her from doing something stupid.

Then he whispered to her so quietly, "_Call of the Wild"_. She looked at him confused but then remembered. He was reminding her of Bonnie's last parlor trick summoning his favorite book. That's all Bonnie was doing, a parlor trick to get Klaus to back down. Elena caught on and gruffly pulled out of his grip to play up being disgruntled that he had stopped her.

Jeremy chimed in. "Sorry, Elena, enough of this. You all are better off dead, really dead."

Klaus thought for sure they were bluffing, but this witch did seem a bit out of control and the hunter looked ready to kill. "You'll have to get a lot closer to use that on me witch." Bonnie let the stake seemingly float in the air.

"No, I won't," she sneered.

Klaus started to chuckle, whether or not it was a cover or in earnest, he caved. "Ok, ok, Caroline is fine. There you go sweetheart." He prodded her toward Tyler and put his hands up in defeat. "All is well, no worries, everyone's just fine…" He was speaking soothingly and with humor to deflate the heated situation. "I just get a little claustrophobic, no pun intended, when I'm trapped." He turned toward the gang in the kitchen. "So you were saying you needed a little help deciphering the sword and such."

Bonnie disengaged and Jeremy caught the stake. They joined the gang in the kitchen working their next steps to finding the cure. They spent a few hours decoding and making plans. Klaus actually was a great help in this as he'd had experience with ciphers and figured out the dials and settings in the hilt of the sword. Elena was stressed out despite the progress. Why was it with all the pieces of the puzzle in hand that only Shane seemed to know everything? Why weren't they able to get everything from the sword. It was the key to the map, a map they now had. Something was rubbing her the wrong way but she just couldn't put a finger on it. They were missing something.

Rebekah had called having acquired Shane but instead of bringing him to the others, she'd secured him for the night. Caroline and Tyler went to her aid to both plan their travel and to get supplies ready for their trip. They would meet again in the early morning hours to set out for the cure. That meant no Shane until morning for Elena and crew. Elena was again on edge. When Stefan tried a hand on hers, or her shoulder, or lightly on her back, she moved away but never letting it look like anything but being frustrated with their progress.

It was getting late. Jeremy and Bonnie needed rest. He packed a backpack and left with Bonnie so she could pack. They'd crash at the Bennett's for the night. Damon followed them out saying, "Jack London again, huh?" Bonnie's answer started with, "It worked didn't it?" The door closed and they were gone.

Klaus was resting on a couch quietly, playing along for now. Elena gave Stefan a look to come upstairs. As they ascended, Klaus called out to them, "You two lovebirds don't mind me. I promise to only listen a little." They both ignored him as best they could but it was still an icky thought, knowing how well Klaus could hear.

Upon entering her room, Elena closed the door behind Stefan and leaned against it. She was giving him quite the heated look. "What?" he asked innocently but feeling her desire. When she didn't answer, he asked, "What's wrong?"

She mouthed her words, "I want you." He smiled lightly. "I need you." He looked at her serious gaze. He was hers. She could have him any time. "I won't be able to be quiet." Ah, now he understood. He smiled softly, coming closer, but she sidestepped him shaking her head. If he so much as kissed her, she'd be immediately in high gear. "Not with him here."

"Ok, pack your bags and let's go." She shook her head. "Then what?" She walked to the window, looked back at him, then jumped out to the ground below. He smiled to himself, excited that she couldn't wait to have him and followed her out. She'd run as soon as she hit the ground. He had to track her scent but she let him catch up. They were behind a house down the street that was for sale, the owners having moved on already. It had a big backyard and pool. She led him to a small pool house which was used to store the cushions for lawn furniture which they were leaving behind for the new owners. Elena was already shedding layers when he sped in and shut the door.

_MMMMMMMMmmmmmm_

"How did you know about this place?"

"Used to babysit here," she panted shedding the last of her clothing. He was not far behind, down to his jeans when she came forward and started kissing his chest. "I've wanted you all day." Her hands dipped into his open jeans effectively distracting him from finishing removing them. "Every time you touched me, I thought I'd lose it." She fondled him and stroked him more aggressively than usual making him hiss but enjoying it all the same. "I could hardly even look your way without wanting to tackle you." Suddenly she pushed him backwards so he fell into the pile of cushions. She was on top of him in a flash. She pinned his wrists above his head and leaned down to kiss him ferociously. She couldn't get enough of him, the taste of him, his lips, his tongue, she savored it all. His hips ground upward pressing his hardness between her legs. She moaned at the feel of him.

Ending the kiss abruptly, they stared at each other so heatedly. "Tell me you are mine," she commanded.

"Yours, all yours," he panted hungry for her next move.

She closed the gap between them again, kissing him fervently. She released one of his hands but he behaved staying where she'd left him. With one hand she turned his head to the side to glide her nails in a long line down his neck to his chest. She followed the same motion with her kisses until she was toying sharply with his nipples. He moaned at her rough play as she nipped and sucked his skin. After marking one side of his chest, she whispered, "Mine." She moved to the other side again toying and teasing his sensitive chest. He flinched a little when she bit a little too hard. "Sorry, but still mine," she whispered.

Her hand slid between her legs to cup his hardness and coax him even harder. She gave a hum of appreciation as she stroked him over his jeans. "Let me guess…," he said.

But she still said it first, "Mine." He chuckled in answer. "Say it," she goaded with a firmer squeeze.

"Yes, yes, yours…" he said flinching but still enjoying this playfulness and commanding side of Elena. She tugged at his clothes but before she could move to remove his jeans, he flipped her over, pinning her down. He smiled sexily down at her surprised but smiling face. "And you are mine…" He kissed her hungrily and sloppily before suddenly standing. She gave a moan of disappointment at the sudden lack of contact. "What? I'm right here," he teased and slowly started to slip his jeans and boxers off. He stood back upright when he tossed aside the last of his clothes. He watched her eye him up and down. Her eyes lingered on his sculpted form, from chest to abs, to yes, even his arousal. It never ceased to amaze her, the beauty and grace of her Stefan. Her eyes came back up to his, a siren call for him to take her. She let her legs slip open for him. In a flash he was on top of her and poised between her legs.

There was a slight pause as their eyes refocused on each other's eyes and lips now so close. "No more teasing tonight, Stefan. Just take me. I need you. Make me yours." He saw the want and need in her eyes but it was deeper than that. There was desperateness in her tonight; she could have been close to tears now but still she smiled lightly. He searched her eyes for the answer to his question. Finding none, he could only do as she asked, give her what she needed, what she said she needed.

She wrapped legs around him as he readied to join with her. Her hands swept into his hair as she pulled him into kissing her. Slowly, he eased inside. She moaned as every inch pressed further inside. They both opened their eyes when he was completely immersed in her world. "I love you," he said low and soft, simply. "I am yours." She smiled softly yet aching for him to move. "And you are mine." She nodded as he pressed a deep kiss to her waiting mouth. He felt her clench her inner muscles around him. He groaned at the intensity. _Message received_, he thought, _moving now_…

He began to work them in an easy pace. She rocked her hips and used her legs to pull him tighter into her warmth if it were even possible for him to be any more inside. They enjoyed this level and stayed savoring the pleasure radiating between them. Their eyes would find the other and longingly gaze. Silent questions were asked and answered. "Feel that?" he asked her in a hushed whisper. She nodded and repeated her movement as did he, both making little O's with their mouth as they felt each heightening sensation.

Faster now, her hips were saying. He was more than happy to oblige. She began to lightly squeeze him on each thrust. "Feel that?" she asked in barely a whisper. He closed his eyes as the intensity increased. As he sped up, she squeezed harder, harder. He opened his eyes with a groan, his mouth agape. Damn, her strength and control were almost blinding him with pleasure. He closed his eyes again, it was so intense. He didn't want this to end too quickly and she was making that difficult. He felt her hands on his face soothing, stroking him. Her fingers slipped from hair to face, over his eyes, his lips, his brow, his jaw, his eyes again, so he opened them to see her watching him. They were both somewhere between their two selves, not quite human, not quite vampire. "I love you, Stefan. So beautiful…" She leaned up to close the distance between them and kissed him. Then softer than a feather she mouthed, "Let me watch you cum."

He groaned at her words, her want, her desire to see him reach that moment of ecstasy. He began a new pace, faster, so good, so good, oh so good…He drove hard and fast into her, pleasing her as much as him. "Your hand," he got out between his groans. "Touch…" She understood despite his inability to speak coherently in the moment. He did not want to finish without her. She slipped a hand between them and worked her pleasure and fast. It didn't take very long. She didn't want to prolong it. She wanted to be fully present when he finished so she could take it all in.

He felt her spasms and it only increased his pleasure and quickened his pace. He reached an inhuman pace now. She slipped her hand back to his face to join the other. She trailed her moistened fingers across his lower lip. His eyes flew open at the taste on his lips and he growled louder than usual. He sucked her fingers into his mouth almost biting. She toyed with his tongue while watching his face. When he leaned slightly to the side, she could see just past him to his gorgeous muscular back, his taut rounded ass pumping into her faster than humanly possible. It was too much. He was too beautiful. He was overwhelming.

A sound from him brought her eyes back to his. He tried to keep his eyes open and on her as much as possible. His face, so beautiful, was contorted somewhere between ecstasy and need. "I love you, Stefan." And he was gone…uncontrolled thrusts, spasms of sheer pleasure and release. He let out a guttural roar. My god she loved that sound. Then he collapsed.

_End of MMMMmmmm section_

Her arms were around him, holding on as tightly as the vice grip of her legs. "I love you so much, Stefan. I want to make you so happy, as happy as you make me." She let a few tears fall.

Coming back to earth, Stefan pressed up to rest on his elbows, but only after Elena would release her hold on him. He smiled lightly down at her hoping he was seeing happy tears. "You make me happier than you can imagine." He watched her, hopeful and yet curious if he'd given her what she needed tonight, if he'd helped her through that desperation he'd sensed earlier.

"Stop it," she said smiling. "I know what you are thinking. Is mind-reading a vampire thing, cuz I swear we had a conversation tonight without words." He gave her a smirk. "I know, but I'm not just talking about body language."

"So what was I thinking?"

"You were asking what was up with me tonight and if I am ok now…" He smiled and conceded she was right with a look. "Well first, I was jealous of Rebekah. I know. I have nothing to worry about. But these dang emotional extremes. I was very aware of what I was feeling. I analyzed it. Decided the little green monster in me was not going to get the best of me. Instead I focused on wanting to, well…do this…"

Stefan looked satisfied with this answer and laid his head back down in the crook of her neck. By the feel of her legs around him, she wasn't letting him leave her any time soon. She was more the talker than he, so he patiently rested against her body waiting for the rest. "Then this whole drama with Klaus, the cure, Jeremy's in danger, it's just so stressful, it's too much. I want to scream half the time. But I can't, so I squelch it, I stuff down the feelings, trying to control them, but it's like there's a pressure cooker inside and I'm just going to lose it. Then you touch me, to help me, but all I want to do is explode and jump you at the same time. Frick, it's all just so overwhelming!"

More tears streamed as she half-sobbed, half-laughed at the mood swings she was experiencing. Stefan picked up his head to look at her again. "Then there's you. You are so overwhelming. So good. So kind. So loving. So gorgeous. So perfect…Overwhelming…I want to go back to just you and me, alone, but I can't, we can't, I have to protect Jeremy…Stefan if anything happens to Jeremy, I just don't know what I'll do." She sniffed and wiped at the tears trailing down into her hair. "God, I'm just all over the place. I'm a mess," she laughed through her tears.

Stefan softly smiled but was concerned with her instability. He wondered if she should make the trip in the morning. "I'm not perfect, Elena, far from it…but thank you. Its ok, it will all be ok. There's a lot going on all while you are healing and changing at the same time. But it will be ok." He wanted to lean down and kiss her softly, to sooth her.

"We don't know that. Stefan, I can't lose Jeremy too. I just can't…if it comes down to his life or the cure…"

"I know. We'll protect him, together." He stole a soft kiss, saying without words how much he was in this with her. It was quiet for a minute or two, as they each touched the other's face and gave light kisses. She started to smile looking like she was about to laugh.

"I don't know how you read me so easily. I mean, I get that you understand me, but, I had every intention of riding the heck out of you tonight, making sure to please you to the moon and back, to outdo what anyone else may have ever done to you before, but somehow, you turned the tables on my feelings and made me truly feel I had nothing to worry about. How you can seem to make all things right, it just amazes me."

"You're the one that's so intuitive, Elena. You read me like a book. You know things about me before I even know them…" he leaned down to kiss her neck and then mumbled into her shoulder. "But what was that you said about riding the heck out of me…"

She gave a low laugh. It was quiet for a moment. "There was something else too…"

"Yes?" he asked continuing to softly kiss and nuzzle into her neck.

"Dealing with jealousy…It made me think about…you know,…"

"Not wanting to make love when Damon might hear."

"At least not right now, ok? I don't want it to be that way, like right in his face."

"I get it." Again it was quiet. "Does that mean I get my ride here tonight?"

She just laughed. He was too cute. He was right of course, but she had to release her emotional laughter before they started up again.


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N – Sorry for the delay in continuing this story. Work always gets crazy insane for me this time of year (March through June). Now that it's over and the dog days of summer are here, I'll have more time for updates to my stories. This one continues on as my alternate Season 4. As always, I do not own the CW/TVD characters or story. I'm simply using some for fun and a stepping stone for my ideas and my story. Enjoy and please do review. I value each and everyone one especially those that go beyond saying I like it and update soon! ;-)**_

_**Reminder since it's been a while…Previously on Bonded for Life, The map was revealed in full when the "Scooby gang" helped Jeremy stake Kol. Klaus is trapped at the Gilberts' but despite this, when threatened by Bonnie and the white oak stake, he helped decipher the map and sword. Rebekah seems fully on board with the gang despite the treatment of her siblings. And our lovebirds, Stefan and Elena have had another fun night somewhat instigated by Elena managing her vampire heightened emotion of jealousy. Enjoy!**_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 14**_

No one got very much sleep that night. Some didn't even bother trying to sleep thinking an all-nighter with making preparations was better than tossing and turning, or better yet, having great sex was the best option with the few hours left before their early departure. Besides, it might make sleeping en route easier. As a group, they decided Tyler and Caroline would stay behind to look after Klaus and Mystic Falls, just in case something came up or if the traveling party needed something. The rest would leave early in order to arrive on the island by early afternoon. That way, they could hike for the rest of daylight, camp overnight, and get to the cure the next day by noon.

The tedium of traveling for hours, anxiously hoping to find a miracle amidst life threatening danger, made for a quietly tense group. Normally bantering here and there, tossing jibes and sarcasm at frenemies, everyone seemed lost in their own thoughts. Perhaps fantasies of being human again, perhaps worries of impending injury and possible deaths,…whatever kept them each preoccupied probably kept any one of them from lashing out at anyone else too much.

Bonnie and Jeremy seemed rather cozy. Not like they'd had sex but there was a spark there again. No doubt the others all thought Bonnie had continued to study Jeremy's mystical ink along with his physique into the wee hours. In truth, she'd left Jeremy be when he finally dozed off. She had covered his naked chest with a blanket having stared seemingly endlessly at the tattoo spread across his muscular body. His body, she could barely admit to herself without blushing, was increasingly calling to her and it was for purposes unrelated to deciphering the tattoo. The blanket helped her focus her attention elsewhere once it blocked her view. "Out of sight, out of mind", she goaded at herself.

Being too anxious to sleep, Bonnie used the rest of the time to meditate on controlling her new magic. She almost feared it and yet relished it just a bit. It felt different than her first magic. She felt this magic more deeply, arousing her feelings of strength and purpose as it also stirred very strong physical reactions. She knew she could leverage incredible power but still worried about her limited ability to manage it without Shane talking her down. Eventually, after tiring both mentally and physically, she dozed off leaning against Jeremy's shoulder. She repeated this modest intimacy again en route to the island just hours later.

Jeremy on the other hand, stayed on high alert the entire trip. A side benefit of becoming a Hunter meant tons of energy and less need for sleep. He'd gotten enough rest in the few hours the night before and was raring to go after raiding Bonnie's fridge for breakfast. He sat protectively still as they travelled hoping Bonnie would catch up on sleep as she leaned warm and soft against him. Jeremy enjoyed his role as protector to Bonnie after his perceived failure at keeping Elena alive and human. He was determined to not fail Bonnie in this along with getting that damned cure for his sister.

Shane appeared to be asleep most of the trip but likely was also making plans in that devious mind of his. No one put it past him to be feigning sleep just to keep his secrets a while longer. He had to protect himself at all costs in order to complete his goal. He was so close. If he could just continue to slowly reveal his unrealized value to the others, he could protect himself until the critical moment. Once achieved, his life would be secured by Silas.

If the others had known Shane better, they would have noticed that Shane was more anxious than ever and visibly less confident about surviving the trip since Damon and the others had mostly figured out how to read the map. But, he kept his stoic if false bravado and continued to play up his knowledge of what to do when they were on the island. He especially touted his knowledge of Silas' headstone and the role it would play in getting the cure as a sure reason to keep Damon from rashly snapping his neck. Shane had another card or two up his sleeve but they would be played in due time.

Rebekah wished she could sleep but ended up giving envious, sidelong glances to Stefan and Elena for nearly the entire trip. It was just so annoying to watch the happy couple sleep and drool the entire way obviously spent from a night without sleep. She remembered the feeling well, the sheer exhaustion from a night a glorious sex with Stefan Salvatore…

While it was true that the happy couple spent nearly two hours entwined in each other, they had ended up on a hunt concerned about being a little weak for their trip and possibly not being able to replenish while on the island. They would have been ok without the hunt if they had not expended so much of their energy in passion in the neighbor's pool house. Despite their mutual fatigue, they agreed that the energy was well spent. So they hunted together, shared a six-point buck, and slept en route. Klaus had never seen them leave the Gilbert home, neither for their romp down the street nor when Elena snuck back inside through her window for a quick pack. Stefan caught her on her jump from the window, quieting her landing. They shared a smile at leaving Klaus to wonder when and where they'd gone and sped to the boarding house so Stefan could grab his things.

Damon simply drank the entire way.

The last leg of the journey required two small skiffs Rebekah had arranged to get the band of frenemies from the mainland to the uninhabited island. In the second skiff, Rebekah was nearly knocked overboard when Elena stood at an inopportune moment. Despite Elena's apologies for being a klutz, Rebekah got in a few jibes setting the tone between them for the rest of the trip. Rebekah realized she was taking out her jealousy on Elena more than being mad about almost going for an unplanned swim, but she didn't care. Stefan had reached for Elena to sit her down and to ensure she didn't fall in, but hadn't lifted a finger to ensure Rebekah, the one that was really at risk of falling in, didn't take the plunge. If she had to watch those two be any more wrapped up in each other, she was entitled to let out her feelings in any way she chose.

Jeremy, Bonnie, Shane, and Damon went over in the first skiff and arrived uneventfully just ahead of the others. All had stayed dry and a long day of hiking began. A mile or two into the unknown, Shane called out for all to stop. He then proceeded to strategically release a trap so that none in the hiking party were injured by it. He warned there would be more. Damon couldn't resist getting in his digs at Shane. "I thought you said this island was uninhabited except by Silas' corpse.

"I did. It is, or is mostly." Shady Shane once again was on display. "But that doesn't mean that mainlanders or even hunters over the years might not have set traps for search parties trying to find Silas and the cure." Shane moved onward, leading the way and advising the others to be on the lookout for more traps. "Remember, if Quetsiyah's hunters set any of the traps, they are bound to be dangerous and maybe contain vervain, and most likely, _sharp wooden objects_," he called back over his shoulder, again keeping himself in the _needed alive_ column due to his knowledge of the island and all things Silas. Shane smiled an evil smile enjoying how he was able to taunt Damon and crew without it seeming that he was. The rest of the party looked cautiously about before following in Shane's footsteps.

Another mile or so passed uneventfully. Shane continued to tell the story of miners who used to work on the island, specifically those who were excavating the well near where Silas was buried. The miners had gone mad. They were rumored to believe if they'd given of their blood in the well, they'd be reunited with their lost loved ones. Whether it was magic or illness, Shane believed that something was going on in that well and it had something to do with Silas. He came to learn how Silas could help him see his dead wife and son again if he set Silas free. This was the most disclosure he'd yet to share with the group making it seem as if he was being more forthcoming than before.

Later, as darkness came, Jeremy and Elena were bringing up the rear, stopping briefly to trade water bottles. Elena didn't really need hers but Jeremy's was empty and he was thirsty. As Elena turned to walk on, Jeremy took a swig and heard someone behind him. Spinning around, a spooky looking archer was about to shoot him but was stopped by a hatchet to the back. Elena ran back yelling to the others to help with Jeremy's safety. No one had any idea why someone would try to kill Jeremy other than trying to warn off the group. There was no evidence that anyone would target the Hunter specifically. But it was almost more concerning that someone unknown to them had stopped the archer and it wasn't someone in their party. Did Jeremy's secret guardian know what Jeremy was? Was it another Vampire Hunter? The group was now even more on edge. They stayed closer together, eyes scanning for trouble from all directions.

As the dark of night took over, Shane chose the spot to stop for the night. There was a cabin the miners had used many years ago with some open spaces for the tents and a ring of stones that looked like it was once a fire pit. "Why? Why don't we keep going and get this over and done with?" Rebekah prodded, not wanting to spend time around a campfire and sharing a cabin or a tent with, well, anyone here. Jeremy hated to admit it, but he agreed, and wanted to keep moving. Shane would have none of it.

"We need Bonnie rested. Heck, we need all of you rested. Do none of you remember how powerful Silas is? We have no room for anything to go wrong. We need rest and planning and caution. Trust me. We all want this over and done but not over and lost. We brought the tents and sleeping bags, right? This is the plan…" He turned away, his body language saying this conversation is over.

Bonnie agreed. She was fatigued physically which would make it all that much harder to control this very powerful magic she only recently began to wield. She wanted some time to clear her head and ensure she was ready for anything she may have to magically fight or conjure. She also wanted Jeremy to get some rest. Hunter or not, he was still human. The last thing they needed was for Jeremy to be overconfident in his abilities and end up getting killed, never mind if he got fatigued and reverted to wanting to harm one of the vampires he had trained himself not to kill.

Camp was set up. The humans ate. Damon and Rebekah shared a blood bag. Despite their excellent vision, neither Stefan nor Elena wanted to hunt and end up finding more traps or other assailants accidentally in the dark. Their recent hunt would tide them over. Still, Damon offered Elena the last of the blood bag with a smirk. "Want it? Wait, No, no human? What's on the menu for you now? I'd offer my hand again but I don't think that would go down well…"

"No thank you, Damon," Elena replied with just a hint of stiffness. Her initial instinct was to snap at him but she thought better of it and swallowed it down not wanting to start something here and now. Stefan would have had her back but she didn't want to start something between the brothers now either. It wasn't the time or the place. She'd expected Damon to revert to his sarcasm and bitterness at some point after losing her post sire bond. Her only surprise was that it took until now for the first relatively subtle barb, subtle relative to Damon, to be aimed directly at her.

After that, Damon kept his distance mostly, not wanting to engage with Elena further, nor his brother. Instead, he decided to confront Shane about what his real plan was. Damon still didn't trust the professor at all. While the elder Salvatore appeared to be completely focused on his scotch during their travels, he had covertly watched the professor. He could tell by breathing patterns all the various times Shane was not really asleep though he looked like he was completely out of it leaning sloppily against a window. Damon also had watched closely as a few more traps were uncovered by the professor late in the day and close to the camp. How convenient that Shane seemed indispensable when they had arrived on the island and again just before they made camp. Damon couldn't help but feel that something was wrong about each situation but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. Was Shane truly spying the traps as they were encountered or did Shane know about them in advance somehow…? Why weren't there any traps spotted by anyone else in the group? Why not a trap off to the side spied by vampire eyes? No it seemed to Damon that each time Shane had found a trap, he walked right to it.

Damon confronted Shane in the miners' cabin. "Who are you trying to call?"

"What?"

"You just had your phone out…Thought you said there wasn't any signal out here…?"

"Yes, and there still isn't. I just checked."

"Uh huh. So, these traps, did you set any off when you were here the last time?"

"No. At least not accidentally." Shane went back to searching else in his backpack.

"You must have been quite the boy scout." Shane felt the mocking almost physically so he gave Damon his full attention. He set down his bag as he turned toward Damon with a questioning look. "It's just that you seemed to be able to disable those traps, three different kinds of traps, without much hesitation…Almost like you knew them…" Damon suggested.

"No, Damon, I didn't know them specifically. But I did my homework," he smiled.

"Yes, the _professor_ would do his homework," Damon smirked sarcastically. "Which means you know very well that it's not that much further to the well, to the cure…and yet…You still haven't told us how the headstone fits into this little island jaunt, nor what we have to do to get the cure."

"All in good time, Damon, all in g…" Shane choked on his last words as Damon's hand closed around his throat.

"I think now is a good time, Professor Shady." Damon forced Shane into an old rickety chair and squeezed Shane's throat harder for good measure. Releasing Shane with a push further back into the chair left him gasping and sputtering. When the vampire's back was turned, Shane slipped a wooden stake from a pocket along his calf distracting from any noise he made with his coughing.

Turning back with rope to secure Shane for an interrogation, Damon was surprised to feel a stake just barely pierce his chest, well below his heart. Shane had missed and Damon caught him before any serious damage could be inflicted. Damon smirked at the startled look from Shane. "What, am I getting too close in my suspicions of the good teacher? Whatever secrets you are keeping must be really good to try to end _me_," Damon leered in closer and continued in a genuinely disturbing sneer. "You try that again and we'll really have some fun."

"Come on, Damon, I have to at least try to defend myself, don't I?" Shane said in his nervous justification of his actions.

Damon secured Shane's wrists and ankles to the chair as he answered. "Oh, I give you credit for that, I do, I didn't think you had it in you. But, you are a good teacher…and now I know not to turn my back…" He finished tying the ropes and stood back, toying with the stake now in his possession. "So, forget about the traps. Tell me about the cure. Where will it be, exactly?" Shane didn't answer. Damon backhanded Shane hard enough to leave a welt and cause a chair leg to splinter and give way. The remaining three legs creaked and left Shane sitting precariously askew. "What was that? I don't think I heard your answer," Damon asked mockingly, a hand to his ear. Shane spit some blood onto the ground and regretted it as soon as Damon's eyes travelled to the reddish liquid pooled on the sandy ground. Damon brought his eyes slowly back up to Shane's. Spying fear in Shane's eyes, and a quickening of Shane's pulse, an evil and possibly thirsty smile grew on Damon's lips. Fangs descended and pulsing veins turned bright blue eyes to blood red. It was all for show and elicited even more signs of fears from the teacher. In a flash, Damon was behind Shane, whispering at his ear as he torqued Shane's head to expose more of his neck. It was prime feeding position for Damon with the carotid artery just below the surface.

"You can't kill me, Damon! You need me," Shane hissed in panic.

"Really, why is that?"

"I know what to do with the headstone."

"I don't care about the headstone. That's for waking Silas. I just want the cure."

"You won't be able to get it. It's trapped with Silas."

"Why not? Why can't I just grab the cure and leave?" Damon eased the strain on Shane's neck but at the same time just barely touched fangs to skin.

Quickly Shane spit out, "Because the two are together. You can't get the cure without moving Silas. You can't move Silas without waking Silas." Still displaying his vampire self, Damon slowly came around to face Shane. Shane continued. "They are bound like stone."

"We're vampires. We can break through stone."

"Even if you could, which you can't, you still need me for another reason." Here it comes, Damon thought. He could smell the professor getting desperate. The fact that Shane was offering another reason meant he thought the first reason to keep him alive wasn't working and it probably meant that the first reason was a lie. Shane continued. "You need me to keep Bonnie under control. The magic she's using, it's called Expression." Damon took a couple steps back, retracting his fangs and listening carefully. Damon knew what Expression was, at least on the surface. Shane continued again as Damon turned back to face him. "I need to keep her in check, only I can do it. She could easily kill us all without even trying or realizing it if she were to lose control."

"Then, I guess, I'll just have to kill you and her."

Shane tried to sound just as cocky and mocking as Damon. "You wouldn't! You wouldn't kill her. Everyone would hate you, Damon, _Elena_ would hate you. Everything you've tried to overcome to find love and have a family would be gone!"

Leaning in on the arms of the chair, Damon applied more than enough pressure to hint at breaking Shane's wrists. He hissed disarmingly at Shane's attempted manipulation. "I guess you haven't noticed that I no longer have that family anymore, Professor not so smarty-pants." Damon stalked behind Shane once more and growled sinisterly and slowly into his ear. Shane could hear fangs descend just next to his ear. Once again, Damon bent Shane's head to the side exposing his neck. "Elena is with Stefan once again. I no longer have to keep any promises to that bitch to protect her friends." Damon dragged his fangs along the soft skin causing just a hint of blood from the scraping. He toyed with the stake, ready to drive it into Shane's stomach. "Now, let's see how much fun we both can have watching you bleed out…while I have dessert." Shane gasped in fear and made a kind of squealing cry to stop. Damon was sure he was about to provide more valuable information with the threat of death looming so near.

"Damon! No!" Elena flew in without warning, knocking the stake from Damon's hand. "What is wrong with you?"

"Elena!" Damon growled in frustration. If he was going to learn anything really important from Shane it was in that moment. Shane would have been reaching the point of caving or at least giving Damon some tidbit of truth in his desperation to stay alive but Elena had ruined the moment. "He's a liar, Elena. He's not telling us everything and you know it." Damon tried to salvage the moment and bit down on Shane's neck.

"Stop!" Elena cried out nearly tackling both Shane and Damon. The chair further caved, moving Shane out of position and Damon stumbled backwards. Instantly back upright, he snarled at Elena looking as is he might come after her but then he turned stalked out unbelievably pissed off.

Elena untied Shane and made sure he was well before leaving to confront Damon about his actions. _He's lost it_ is all she could think. She was able to trail his scent. He wasn't far but was away from the others.

"Damon, have you lost your mind?"

He knew she'd come looking for him so he hadn't bothered to hide. She'd probably have kept looking for him and gotten injured or killed if she stumbled into a trap so he didn't make it difficult to find him. He turned to face her. "No, Elena, I haven't lost my mind. Maybe something else, but not my mind," he said pointedly. It was awkward for a moment as she wondered if he was implying about how he'd lost her.

"Damon, we need Shane to help get the cure. It's what this whole crazy quest is about. Have you forgotten that?"

"He's lying, Elena. He's not telling us something and it's big, whatever it is. I almost had him, he was right there, I could smell it…and _you_ had to come and play _hero_ like your _boyfriend_ and screw it all up!" He was in her face by the end of his outburst. Elena tried to stay strong but internally cringed at his words. She wanted to scream back at him but refrained from losing it completely. It wouldn't do any good to escalate this by being louder and angrier.

"You were about to stab him, Damon. I thought you were going to kill him."

"And so what if I had, Elena?"

"Damon,…"

"Elena,…He's playing us, all of us, and you know I'm right," he said pointing at her accusingly.

"No, I don't, Damon…" she said a little more quietly reaching for his arm.

"Don't you dare, Elena, don't you _dare_ touch my arm and say it! You don't get to tell me to be the better man anymore."

It was quiet. That wasn't what she was about to say, but it was a good point and she knew it. Whatever words she'd used would have led to a similar conversation more than likely. If he really was just trying to get information, she felt guilty for putting the kibosh on Damon's plan, however misguided.

"Did he tell you anything new?"

"Nothing worth mentioning, but he was about to…," Damon said, withholding the comments on Bonnie's magic and the limited knowledge he had of Expression. It wasn't worth mentioning until he could verify it was an issue.

"You should have said something and we'd have helped. I'm sorry. I'll go back to camp." Elena turned to leave regretting that she'd foiled Damon's attempt at getting information from Shane. She hoped it was all true, that Damon wouldn't have killed Shane unless he was a real danger to their lives.

"Running away now? Now that we've finally said more than two words to each other?"

She stopped and turned back to Damon. She could see the angry stance, the cold blue eyes, and the tension in every muscle. But still, she could see the pain behind the anger. It wouldn't have surprised her to know, now that she knew him better, that Damon may have shed a tear over losing her. The sire bond and all its trappings hadn't kept her from learning ever more about Damon and his well secreted-away humanity. She swallowed, trying to steady herself for the conversation they both had been avoiding.

He looked at her, waiting. He'd gotten her to stay but he knew better than to really start the conversation. He'd only be able to instigate with jibes. When it became apparent he wasn't going to start, she ventured in with the question that had been haunting her from the first day, her first day of not being under the control of the sire bond.

"Did you know?" He looked confused and waited for more. "Did you even wonder what might have been going on with me,…before we…?" Her voice caught in her throat. He understood her question, she could tell, so she didn't even try to continue.

"No." That's all he said. Now she looked confused.

"No suspicions at all?" she asked a bit incredulously. "I choose Stefan and then suddenly I'm with you?"

"It didn't seem sudden to me. I just thought, well I wondered if your transition helped, if it made you more like me." She didn't look like she completely believed him and it ticked him off. "I said _no_, Elena, I did not know. I'm not lying. I've no reason to now. It's abundantly clear once and for all that I don't get to be with you so why would I lie." She looked at him, considering his answer and not sure what to believe. He stepped just a bit closer to her, closing the distance between them but still keeping about six feet from her. "Look, if a man in the desert is dying of thirst and is given water, does he question if it's really for him? It's everything he's hoped for, struggled to find, desperate for just a drop…do you really think this man would question when it is given to him freely?"

Damon's stance eased and his voice drew quieter. "But I did question it, later, that first morning, I woke up thinking that there is no way I deserved it,…no way I deserved you…" Damon looked down, unable to look at the pain mixed with empathy exuding from her beautiful face. It struck too close to home knowing all the emotion was intended for him. Damon didn't do pity, giving or receiving.

"Now, my question," he said turning the tables on her and veering away from the emotions he wanted to rein in. "Was any part of it real? Can you even tell, you know, now that you are free?"

"I'm still working it all out. Mostly, I've just been really angry, angry with you, because I couldn't understand how you didn't know and how you,…how _we_ slept together," she looked down, kicking at some debris with her boot, "so soon after Stefan and I…" She trailed off not needing to explain the slutty guilt she was working through. "I know a lot of the anger should just be anger at the situation. But it gets directed at me and well, mostly you."

"Elena, if down deep I knew, in any way, I was in complete denial. I did not suspect the sire bond until Stefan brought it up and that I freely admit was the moment I semi-consciously headed into denial." He paused, hoping to let it all sink in and hoping to ease her guilt just a bit since it would ease his as well. "So, you don't know the answer to my question then?"

"Damon…you know the answer, I think we both do." Her eyes pleaded gently with him to not push this further. It would mean rehashing what she's told him before.

"I know, I know,…It's always gonna be…" She silenced him with her fingers against his lips having quickly stepped forward.

"Stop. Stop this. I'm not a prize to be won. You don't have to prove anything. Just find some happiness all your own, Damon." Sensing his reaction to her touch, she dropped her hand away from his lips. She turned to leave, cursing herself for the intimate move.

Despite everything they had said, he wished she'd stay touching his mouth just a bit longer. "Wait," he called. She sighed quietly and pursed her lips. Slowly she relaxed and turned around awaiting his question. "Can I just kiss you once more?"

If she was still sweet, innocent, human Elena, she might have let him. It would have been out of compassion, at least on the surface. The part that human Elena wouldn't admit to herself would have been that there was a side of her that wanted him to kiss her back then. She was weak when it came to his advances and it had nearly ruined her more than once.

But she wasn't human anymore. She was vampire. She hardened inside at his request, not that anyone else could see. She was a victim of a sire bond and used for sex. Blameless or not though he might be, her body repulsed at the thought of him kissing her now.

"No, Damon, you can't. I should have been more insistent about that long ago. But I was weak and young and naïve." He smirked slightly, knowing that this meant he could still affect her but mostly to hide his disappointment. She turned on her heel and left him there in the woods.

Before she even got back to camp, a cry from Bonnie stopped everyone in their tracks to listen and gauge the direction from which the cries came. "Jeremy?!" And again, "Jeremy?!" Everyone came running to Bonnie's side asking what happened. Bonnie explained that Jeremy had excused himself to relieve himself behind a tree but never came back. Bonnie had heard a noise, a scuffle, and he was gone.

"Maybe he just needed to, you know, get more privacy…?" someone offered.

"No, he's gone. Something's wrong. I can feel it." Bonnie was adamant.

They searched for an hour or so, carving the surrounding area into quadrants and splitting up to search. Elena took the North. Stefan took the south. Rebekah took the West. Damon took the East. Bonnie said she and Shane would stay back in case Jeremy returned on his own. By the time the four vampires returned, each without Jeremy, Bonnie was in quite a state. She'd gone to the miners' shack and seen the broken chair, broken ropes, and no sign of the good professor. Now, both Jeremy and Shane were not to be found. She cried out to her remaining companions. "What do we do now?"

"We'll find them, Bonnie," Damon said, uncharacteristic concern for her in his voice. "Let's all just stay calm and think this through. Did you see Shane at all after we left? Is the headstone still here?" Bonnie shook her head no to both questions. Damon grimaced and looked to Rebekah who vamp-sped to her tent to check. The headstone was confirmed gone by the Rebekah's one utterance of _shit!_

Elena crossed to Bonnie to support her friend by wrapping an arm around her. "We'll find them, Bonnie. Maybe they're with the person who saved Jeremy today so we know they won't be harmed. Maybe we just have some more competition for the cure, or something. We'll figure it out."

Bonnie looked into Elena's eyes, tears still falling down her face. "We have to find them. We just have to…" Bonnie sniffled before completing the embrace Elena had started.

Damon shared a look with the vampires. He wasn't looking too happy about Bonnie's emotional state. Would she be controllable without Shane? Were the forewarnings about Bonnie's use of Expression now suddenly all too possible? Only time would tell.


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N – As always, I do not own the CW/TVD characters or canon story. I'm simply using some for fun and a stepping stone for my ideas and my story. Enjoy and please do review. I value each and everyone one especially those that go beyond saying I like it and update soon! ;-) **_

_**I'm bumming…last chapter, lots of views/hits, very few reviews… (does guilt work? ;-) Thanks to those few I received. **_

_**TVD – Bonded for Life, Chapter 15 (a little light M, but could be hard T…)**_

Damon shared a look amongst his vampire companions. He wasn't looking too happy about Bonnie's emotional state. Would she be controllable without Shane? Were the forewarnings about Bonnie's use of Expression now suddenly all too probable? Only time would tell.

Bonnie's remaining protectors, four vampires of varying ages and loyalties, each took note of Bonnie's frantic emotional state. Her heartbeat was quick and her vocal inflections panicky. Her hands were tense and rigid as she tried to express her fears over Jeremy and Shane being missing. Her fingers moved, tightening and easing, back and forth, like the claws of a large bird of prey with strange black veins surfacing, fading, and resurfacing again. It was a disturbing site from the typically quiet and calm Bonnie Bennett. She seemed unaware of her movements and the odd colorations running through her hands. As severe as she could be with vampires who caused harm to humans, she never looked this strained before. Her physical embodiment of power and energy appeared to be on the verge of exploding like an unstable powder keg. If only they all knew how accurate this description just might be. Bonnie was capable of wielding more power than any of them knew, even Bonnie herself.

Glancing from one to the other, the team of four each recognized that Bonnie needed rest before they searched further, maybe more than just a few hours if it took longer for her to get a grip. They took care to make it sound as if they all needed sleep but really they just wanted Bonnie to calm down and rest. No one had seen her in quite this state before, even Elena. She took Bonnie to her tent to bundle her up in a sleeping bag for the night. She stayed with Bonnie, calming and consoling her, in the process convincing herself that this must be about Bonnie's emotional attachment to Jeremy and maybe to Shane. To Elena's knowledge, Bonnie had never been in love before. Maybe it had finally happened and thus the heightened level of panic Elena had just witnessed.

After some time just breathing, Bonnie eventually confided in Elena that it wasn't just Jeremy she was worrying about. It was Shane and not having him near. Elena probed to understand why Bonnie seemed so shaken by Shane being missing more so than Jeremy.

"Bon, do you have _feelings_ for Shane?" Bonnie looked at Elena like she had a purple head and orange hair. "I mean, it's alright if you do," Elena quickly added hoping the question wasn't too much pressure. Elena was Jeremy's sister after all. Maybe Bonnie didn't feel right confiding in Elena about feelings for Shane.

"No, that's not it." Bonnie put her hand to her forehead in frustration. "It's that Shane helps me with my magic. He keeps me centered."

"I don't get it. You are a witch. How does he help? Is he a witch too?"

"No, no, he just gets how it works. This is all so new for me and it's, well, it's just really challenging to work with this kind of magic. I can't use nature anymore, you know, the magic I lost? This is different and powerful and not subject to the rules of nature. I have to manage it all on my own if Shane's not here." She could still see confusion in Elena's eyes as her friend tried to understand. Maybe she was making it worse by over-sharing with Elena. Maybe she should just deal with it and focus on helping find Shane in the morning. Bonnie regrouped, trying to look like she was bucking up after a momentary freak out. "It's hard to explain, I know. Look, I don't want to make you worry." Bonnie took a deep, cleansing breath for show. She put a sort of smile on her weary face and continued. "We'll find them in daylight. I'll work a spell. We'll track them. It will be fine."

Elena could tell her friend was holding back. "Bonnie, I've known you forever. I know you can do this. You have so much strength, more than any of us. You know what's right and what's wrong and you'll make the right decisions. You'll be fine, with or without Shane's help. Besides, you have the rest of us to help you. Just tell us what we can do."

Bonnie knew she hadn't fully explained, at least not enough to really get Elena to understand but she didn't want to worry her friend by continuing to try. Bonnie resigned herself to managing through the time away from Shane. "You're right. I just need to focus. We'll talk about what you can do to help tomorrow. Right now, I just need sleep. Gosh, I'm just being all high maintenance, aren't I?" She ended with a light smile and a sleepy sigh to show she was calming down. She scooted further down into the sleeping bag and settled in to sleep. Elena stayed a few more minutes until a semi-serious, semi-sarcastic Bonnie told Elena she couldn't fall asleep with someone hovering over her. She made Elena leave under threat of magically flying her out of the tent like those feathers from so long ago. So Elena left, noting for the record that her departure was under protest and that they would talk in the morning.

The others had moved off a bit to keep out of earshot from Bonnie. Damon had already shared Shane's concerns about Bonnie's magic with Stefan and Rebekah. Stefan reminded Damon of what the bayou witch in New Orleans had said about her mother's failed attempt at managing Expression. Rebekah had some knowledge from her days in New Orleans as well. She also shared cursory comments from the Original Witch. All up, they determined they should be worried but if anyone could manage Expression, it was Bonnie Bennett, or so they hoped.

Elena made her way back to the group. She didn't need to share her talk with Bonnie as the other vampires had heard it all. Elena was brought up to speed and now better understood what Bonnie was trying to tell her. She agreed that Bonnie would be someone that would better handle Expression than perhaps others. However, she felt the need to further explain where Bonnie's strength came from. "I'd normally be in total agreement on this, but things have changed for Bonnie. Losing her magic, her first magic, it really shook Bonnie to her core. Probably more than it would have if she hadn't already lost her Grams, her mother basically twice, Caroline's transition, mine…and all the other drama. She's lost her footing in a way. Now, she's vested so much of her new magic abilities in Shane's help. I didn't realize how much until tonight. I'm not sure she really believes she can handle it without Shane."

"She seemed to be coming around when you were talking her down," Rebekah offered, almost as if she was complimenting Elena.

"She was just trying to convince me that she was ok. She didn't want me to worry. I guess now I understand why. I think I should stay with her tonight. Maybe we all should stay close. The last thing we need is for any more of us to go missing."

"I'm not sleeping with all of you," Rebekah remarked, back on form.

"Nor I…" Damon snarked. "But I'm not letting Bonnie out of my sight."

"Nor I…" Rebekah chimed in. Both of them obviously didn't want to sleep near Stefan and Elena but they used hanging on to their last bit of leverage with Bonnie as the reason each wanted to keep watch over the witch. Stefan and Elena would have to make do on their own.

Stefan was ok with this but never dreamed that Elena would leave Bonnie with those two. But, she did. "Fine," Elena said rolling her eyes. She understood the awkwardness of this four-way partnership. Exes were bound to make for awkward pairings now and then due to the various hook-ups across the group.

Elena left to check in on Bonnie. Since Bonnie was still awake, Elena let her know to expect Damon and Rebekah keeping close watch while she and Stefan kept watch from across the way. Bonnie wanted to interject that she'd prefer Stefan and Elena but then again, Rebekah and Damon had better control of their bloodlust. Besides, she figured if she needed someone to attack an intruder, it might as well be the strongest two vampires.

By the time Elena left Bonnie's side, Damon and Rebekah were happily ensconced next to Bonnie like guardian bookends. Bonnie reminded them both with a smile that she could start fires with her mind so they shouldn't get too close. Damon snarked right back about how picking a fight with her bodyguards was probably not the wisest decision.

Elena left them, rolling her eyes yet again. Most times she was so happy to see the spark between Bonnie and her brother, Jeremy. Other times, she just wanted to tell Damon and Bonnie to _get a room_. She didn't really want them together. It was just the bickering and bantering that was annoying and yet comical. It made Elena wonder if down deep those two might just be what the other needed for very different reasons. Then again, she wouldn't wish Damon on her best friend, not really.

Stefan noticed the ironic little smile on Elena's face as she walked back toward him with her hands in her pockets. He watched the sway of her hips as she lazily walked toward him. He'd found a spot just away from the others where they could talk and hopefully be unheard, but still close enough to come to the rescue if needed. He smiled softly back at her as he leaned against a strong low hanging tree branch. "I know what you are thinking…" he said soft as air. Of course she could still hear him.

"I doubt that," she said giving him a knowing look as she got closer.

"Never gonna happen." Elena looked at him wondering if he did really know what she was thinking.

"Why is that?" she asked, testing him, as she walked into his embrace.

Stefan whispered ever so quietly in her ear. "Because he'd be too afraid of her wrath, before, during, and afterwards." Elena giggled softly and held on tightly to the strength she felt in his arms. "The wrong spell at the wrong time and poof, there goes his head..."

She giggled again. "Hhmm, so you did know what I was thinking…but it was only a joke….like, get over it already…you know? Besides, I think she and Jeremy might…maybe…" She stopped short, once again focused on her missing brother. "Stefan, what if we can't find them?" He held her tighter against him.

"We will. It will be fine. Someone wanted him alive and needed him here probably for the same reason we did."

"For the map," Elena mumbled into his shoulder.

"Mm hm," Stefan hummed in the affirmative. "But, they don't have the sword to decipher it."

"But they probably have Shane…" she said worriedly pulling back to see the concern on his face as well. They shared a look. It was probably true that whoever took Jeremy likely had something to do with Shane's disappearance. They just didn't know if Shane being gone was voluntary or coerced.

"Damon doesn't trust Shane," Stefan chimed in.

"Nooo, he does not," Elena said broadly, agreeing whole-heartedly. "You should have seen him today trying to torture information from him."

"I wondered what was going on. I was setting up a tent and talking with Rebekah so I didn't quite hear," Stefan said catching Elena's distaste for Rebekah. Elena scrunched her nose so he gave it a quick nip and kiss bringing back Elena's smile.

"Damon said I came in all _heroic_ like my _boyfriend_ before he could get the real truth from Shane."

"That part I actually kind of heard," he said sheepishly smiling.

"Kind of heard? What else did you hear?" Elena asked with a sly smile. He answered with his lips and pressing her firmly against his body. After really laying one on her, they both came up for unneeded air, reeling from the instantly overwhelming nature of the kiss.

"What was that for?" Elena asked smiling and nearly dizzy from the sudden spike in her arousal.

"You. You are amazing." She raised one eyebrow mockingly questioning his sanity. She pretended to take his temperature, her hands on his forehead and cheeks before then checking his eyes and mouth. He just chuckled at her pulling his chin away playfully while she held on trying to peer down his throat. "I'm fine." He pretended to try to nip her fingers to get her to stop. "I have to tell you though... I didn't mean to but I heard you earlier, with Damon."

"Oh?"

"I really wasn't trying to but you two got a little loud so it was hard _not_ to hear. Rebekah heard you too. Everyone is on high alert so…"

"I guess it wasn't necessarily the best time for _that_ conversation."

"But you handled it beautifully."

"I did?" she asked a little surprised at his assessment.

"I think so, don't you?"

"I don't want to hurt anyone, even him, but…"

"It's kinder in the long run…" Stefan said quietly.

"Yes,…exactly." It was just that simple. She looked at him and thought he must be the most compassionate person in the world. She was finally getting it, how much it was her decisions, or rather indecision that kept the triangle in play. Not that Damon was blameless, but she realized once and for all how much pain she triggered for all three of them. "I guess it took me a while to learn that. I'm so sorry, Stefan."

"Hey, no, we aren't having this conversation for you to apologize to me. I'm complimenting you. You are wonderful and I love you." He kissed her again. Her initial sorrow eased and she began to respond to his kiss, fully enjoying the taste of his mouth on hers. The forest contributed the aroma of pine, fir, grass, earth and more. Stefan's scent combined with the overwhelming manliness surrounding her made for a truly heady fragrance as she melted into him.

Elena felt Stefan press more firmly to her body and noticed a certain hardness pressing against her. She pulled back from the kiss. "Hey now, we need to cool it. Too many super ears..."

"I know, I know. I didn't mean to...you know." He adjusted his stance a little to reduce possible friction of her body on his as well as relieve a little pressure of his now tighter jeans. Still, he looked happy and yet sweetly sad. "I've just wanted to kiss you since you finished that conversation, before Bonnie started yelling for help."

"It meant that much to you?"

"It meant that much to _you_ and to me, for you to finally address the questions you've wanted to ask. And, it was unexpected, but, it meant a lot to see how you handled Damon's last request."

"I'm so sorry it took me so long to get that right. But you know, early on, I had said no over and over…I'm just sorry that I…"

"No, no, stop apologizing. It's not about me or before. You know, we do what we can do. And when we are ready to do more or better, we do. That's all. He's not the last guy that's going to come on to you. And you care about him. And you don't want to hurt him by rejecting him…"

"But it's kinder in the long run…" she said with a soft smile. He smiled softly right back. They moved back into a tight embrace and stayed there for quite some time. Stefan reveled in the smell of her as ne nuzzled into her hair. An owl called into the night. Stefan spotted it and pointed it out to Elena. They could see some stars due to the clearing of the campsite but the rest of the sky was hidden by the forest.

After enjoying the quiet, Elena mumbled into Stefan's neck. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep."

"Because of Jeremy?" Stefan guessed.

"Mm hm."

"So maybe we should find a way to relax you…?" Stefan said seductively, easing his hips forward just a bit as his mouth found that sensitive spot on her neck.

"How can you even joke about having sex here? It's the middle of a crisis and we are on duty!" she said half in jest.

"I guess it's kind of like you yesterday in the pool house," he teased her.

"Oh really? How's that?"

"I'm focusing all my heightened vampire emotions on you." Again he was nuzzling into her sensitive neck just under her ear."

"Then start focusing on how much sleep we need to get through this, Mr. Salvatore, and how we should conserve energy to protect Bonnie," she said trying to be stern but failing to keep her hips from pressing forward as he nibbled and kissed.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am," he said as if he was going to listen to her order but went right back to kissing her neck. Then in barely a whisper, as he nuzzled into her hair, "Is that your final answer, Miss Gilbert?" His hands slid from her waist to the back pockets of her jeans.

She giggled and pulled his hair where her fingers had been lazily twirling. "Yes, final answer. Don't tease the newbie vampire. She doesn't have complete control over her heightened…mmm…everything…mmm ….Stefan…ok, but a quickie." He growled softly into her neck before taking her mouth again with his. His hands began to massage and caress all the right places as they made their move to distance themselves from the others. They drifted further away from camp, careful to not make too much noise as their make-out continued to escalate into full on groping. Once they were far enough away, clothing was shifted but not completely removed. Jeans were lowered and shirts pushed higher.

Soon they were joined together with Elena bracing her hands against a tree and turning her face into her jacket collar to muffle her moans. Behind her, Stefan was intensely driving them both higher. His hands were everywhere, reaching around to fondle and squeeze then moving lower to circle her center faster and faster, harder and harder in answer to her muted cries.

It was over too soon but he'd kept it quick per her request. He helped her lean back against his chest and held her there as both came back down to earth all too soon. As he nuzzled her neck, she sighed, happy she gave in to his desires.

The next morning, Bonnie was the first to wake. She was perfectly still, on her back when suddenly she awoke with a gasp. She'd been dreaming. She knew that fire had been involved as well as a dark stone-like figure and perhaps blood. She thought she'd seen Jeremy but it wasn't clear. She wasn't sure what to make of it but knew she wouldn't be going back to sleep. The sun was up although it barely lit the camp as the trees blocked the low angled rays. She turned to look toward Rebekah who appeared to still be asleep, then to Damon who was watching her. Bonnie was a little startled at his closeness and staring. Damon smirked at her reaction but let her off the hook. "Hey, _you_ woke _me_," he said as he turned his head the other direction and continued to lounge as if to fall asleep again.

Bonnie left to relieve herself but didn't go far. She knew that meant the others would hear her but she didn't care. She wasn't going to give any foes a better shot at kidnapping her because of being shy. Coming back into camp, Bonnie went to the rusted old water pump that the miners must have used as their primary water source. It looked to be ancient, rusted, and in complete disrepair. She tried the pump handle but it was rusted tight, stuck in the position she found it.

She heard a voice behind her. "Need some help? Better yet, we have water." Bonnie shook her head no as Damon approached, passed her, and started to put his hands on the handle.

"Don't," she said, instructing him not to touch the pump. "You'll just break it." He turned back to see her with her eyes closed and lips still moving though she was no longer speaking, at least not to him. Something, instinct perhaps, told him to back away from the pump. Sure enough, water started to drip from the spout without even pumping the handle.

Bonnie's eyes opened and she smiled. Damon caught her eye. "You can pump it now, if you want to, or not," she taunted lightly. Damon looked at her a little wary of what she may have spelled the pump to do. With one hand on the pump but his body prepping like a runner getting ready to steal home base, he got ready to pump then run. "It's just water, Damon," Bonnie said laughing a bit at his reticence.

"I've seen what you can do with water, thank you fiery much," he sneered at her and yet smiled a bit thinking he probably looked a little comical. He cranked the handle a couple times and it screeched loudly like it needed oiling. He stepped back as water flowed from the spout for a few seconds. He gave her an impressed smirk. "Nicely done, witch." The screeching subsided as he leaned in to pump the handle a couple more times, allowing Bonnie to rinse her hands and step back. Before Damon could rinse his hands and splash his face, Bonnie did it for him, magically of course. She was now laughing at him truly amused, as were Elena and Stefan. They had stepped out of their tent upon hearing the pump. Damon just smirked and shook the water off saying, "Thanks, I could have done it all on my own."

"You're welcome, _vampire_." Bonnie called over her shoulder as she went to get water bottles in order to refill them.

Sharing a smile with Bonnie as they passed each other, Stefan and Elena joined Damon at the water pump. "She seems in good spirits this morning, no pun intended," Elena commented as they approached. "Where's Rebekah?"

"She's probably doing her make-up, Elena, how do I know?" Damon snarked, still a little miffed about the water incident drenching the front of his shirt and mussing his hair.

"You're the one that slept with the Original sister, Damon," prodded Stefan teasingly. Again Damon smirked at Stefan's double meaning.

"Do you really want to go there, Stefan?" Damon jibed right back.

"Boys, boys, I'm right here," Rebekah said emerging from the tent behind Bonnie, both with water bottles. "Goodness, you don't need to fight over little old me!" she cooed like a southern belle. Elena just rolled her eyes. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately in her efforts to deal with her predecessor's presence. Stefan just smiled to himself having seen her coping mechanism more than once.

While filling water bottles, they made plans to head out in the next twenty minutes. That would give Bonnie time to get ready, eat something, and the others to decamp. They filled water bottles not just for themselves but possibly for Jeremy and Shane. Injured or not, hostages or not, they figured extra water couldn't hurt in case the missing parties needed it. Bonnie cleared her things from the tent, packed her backpack and headed back to the stone fire ring to wait while the others were focused on rolling sleeping bags and disassembling tents. They didn't need to bring all the gear with them today as they would come back by the site on their return but they wanted it packed up and ready to go. There was no need to lug it further.

When they were busy going back and forth to the miners' shack, Bonnie began to work a locater spell. She held some of Jeremy's belongings she'd taken from his backpack. She was using her new magic and wasn't sure how to proceed. She didn't have any living family member's blood to find him. Essentially she was experimenting; at least it's what she would have called it if she'd done this with her first magic. Focusing on her intention, on Jeremy, and Shane, she began to speak quietly, almost in tongues, unsure of what exactly she was going to say until she said it.

Her breathing began to shorten into quick panting. A feeling she could only equate to electricity ghosted through her body making her tremble and shudder. Dark veins rose and flowed, coursing through her body, then back up to the surface or her skin, and then moved deeper inside. She shivered almost in pleasure and opened her eyes with a gasp.

She hadn't notice, but the weather had become unstable around the campsite. The wind was whipping up the sandy dirt from the remaining worn paths, and the trees were bending to the will of the currents. The quartet of vampires was positioned in a semi-circle behind Bonnie, but too concerned for safety to come any closer to an active Expression spell and a witch seemingly in a cyclone of power.

When Bonnie's eyes opened, the weather calmed almost immediately. The black veins that had travelled her skin were gone. Bonnie knew exactly where the four were standing. She'd seen it. She'd seen everything. She'd even seen the stone figure from her dream and knew what it was.

"I know where they are," she said quietly, knowing the vampires could hear her.

Elena came forward quickly as the others slowly followed. "Bonnie, are you ok? What happened?"

Bonnie was eerily calm. She didn't turn to look at Elena by her side. "They are in the woods going north just as we will be. There are three, Jeremy and Shane and another that follows them. An archer, I think." Bonnie's face took on an angry grimace and nearly growled her next statement. "Jeremy is bound to the Archer like a dog on a leash."

"What about Shane? Did it look like he was a prisoner too?" Damon asked.

Bonnie considered the question and reviewed what she'd seen. "He was side by side with Jeremy, but not bound." Stefan and Damon shared a look.

"That could mean anything. Jeremy's the big hunter – I'd bind him too if I was taking him prisoner," Stefan said worriedly. They still didn't know if Shane was taken or left of his own free will.

"Bonnie, they were all right, right?" Elena asked quietly, placing a hand on Bonnie's arm. Bonnie finally turned to look at Elena. Her eyes were still far away but came back into focus to take in Elena's anxious expression. Bonnie softened her appearance and nodded that yes, they were ok. Elena sighed as she gave a soft smile in relief and caught Stefan's eye.

"We'll finish packing up and be ready to go in just a few minutes, ok, Bonnie?" Elena said quietly. "You rest here. You probably want a minute to, ah, regroup, right?" Bonnie again nodded solemnly and turned facing forward again, eyes closed, presumably meditating.

Damon and Rebekah split a blood bag again, sucking it down quickly, each then tucked an extra in their coat pockets and stowed the rest in the shack. Elena and Stefan finished up stowing their belongings, and Jeremy's, in the shack as well. Checking over their lightened packs for everything they needed for this last leg of the journey, the four emerged energized and ready to be on their way.

"Do you smell that?" Rebekah asked as they strolled back to Bonnie and she tightened the straps on her pack.

"Smells like smoke," Damon guessed. "Probably a little witchy woo-woo going on at the fire pit."

Stefan and Elena followed, enjoying a bit of hand-holding without jealous eyes interfering. Stefan carried the one backpack between them to which they'd add some water bottles.

As the four approached, there was no fire in the old stone fire ring. Bonnie was not in sight. Her backpack was gone as were two of the four refilled water bottles. The two water bottles that remained were once again empty and strewn about, open and now dirty, almost blackened. Stefan picked up a bottle and sniffed at it. It smelled like smoke, as if its contents had been on fire moments before.

Seconds of disbelief seemed to pass interminably. They all spun around to scan the area and listen for any signs. Frantically they looked for any other indication of their friend and ally and what direction she may have gone, alone or not.

"Bonnie!" Elena yelled. Her only answer was terrible silence driving her to scream yet again. "Baaaaaaaahhhhhhnneeeee!"


End file.
